I'm doing the exact opposite. I'm totally justifying why every month would be a GREAT month for a newborn. Right now I'm all 'December! Festive! Cozy! Tiny little Christmas sleepers!'
It really hurts my heart to see a sad face emoji about a December baby. I would be absolutely ecstatic about a December baby, or any baby.
Seriously. After 23 failed cycles, an IF diagnosis, and now going through fertility treatments, I can't imagine feeling sad about a December baby. Someone else compared this question to walking into a room full of starving kids and asking about eating cake and they hit the nail on the head. Pretty insensitive question to ask in this forum, but that's just my perspective.
Me: 29 DH: 28 Together since 2008, married Sept 2013 ttc #1 since July 2014 DX: unexplained infertility Sept, Oct, Nov Clomid 50 mg: BFN Feb 2016 IUI w/ 50mg Clomid, Ovidrel, Prometrium: BFN March 2016 IUI w/ 50mg Clomid, Ovidrel, Prometrium: BFN June 2016 IVF: BFP 6/28!!! beta #1: 358, beta #2: 1428, beta #3: 3742
I'm doing the exact opposite. I'm totally justifying why every month would be a GREAT month for a newborn. Right now I'm all 'December! Festive! Cozy! Tiny little Christmas sleepers!'
So, no.
Andplusalso:
Me:27 DH: 28 Married May 2012 TTC#1 July 2013 - July 2015 (no success) Again TTC#1: Dec 2015 First RE visit: Feb 2016 BFP: 9/16/16 EDD:5/26/17
As NOT ONLY a December baby, BUT A CHRISTMAS EVE BABY myself- my mother thought of me AS THE BEST PRESENT SHE EVER GOT- NOT A FUCKING INTERRUPTION TO HER LIFE.
Most of us on here would give anything for our BFP and a healthy/happy baby any day any time EVER.
ME: 31 | DH: 31
Married: April 2015
TTC (BBT & FF) #1: April 2015 (Off BC: January 2015)
It really hurts my heart to see a sad face emoji about a December baby. I would be absolutely ecstatic about a December baby, or any baby.
Seriously. After 23 failed cycles, an IF diagnosis, and now going through fertility treatments, I can't imagine feeling sad about a December baby. Someone else compared this question to walking into a room full of starving kids and asking about eating cake and they hit the nail on the head. Pretty insensitive question to ask in this forum, but that's just my perspective.
Thats the first time I've heard that comparison to this insensitive question and that is 100% accurate. Same applies to the posters who come here asking how to have a better chance of having a boy vs. girl or vice versa. I'll take ANY baby, ANY month.
Married 2011
TTC #1 since April 2015
Fur child: One awesome Golden Retriever IUI August 2016 : Cancelled due to polyp September 2016: Polyp removal/hysteroscopy October 2016: IUI #1- BFN November 2016: IUI #2- BFN December 2016: IUI #3 - BFN January/February 2017 - IVF + ICSI + PGD March 2017 - FET
ETA: I'm very sorry for your loss OP. I meant to put this in my original post and got a little sidetracked. I have the attention span of a goldfish today.
When I first started TTC I hadn't honestly really thought about when would be the best months to have a baby. I hadn't really considered that certain months would make for an easier pregnancy in one way or another. I just wanted a baby and figured pregnancy would be uncomfortable during any 9 months of the year.
**TW: Loss mentioned** When I got pregnant back in October I was absolutely over the moon. It wasn't till I made it to my BMB that I realized people put way too much thought into which 9 months they'll be pregnant and what baby's EDD is. Like seriously I ever heard ladies complain about things like "I really wanted to be very visibly pregnant for Halloween so I could dress my bump up as a pumpkin/do a bun in the oven costume/ etc." I heard ladies complain about how difficult it was going to be to be very pregnant during the heat of the summer. I heard ladies complain about how fall is their favorite time of year and now they'll have morning sickness through part of it so they won't be able to enjoy it. I heard complaints about how it would be hard to hide a pregnancy while visiting family for the holidays. The list goes on and on and on... I remember I started to become ever so slightly concerned that these are all things I didn't think about before hand but then decided "ya know what, I'm just glad I'm pregnant." And then I have the absolutely soul-crushing experience that is a MC. ****************
OK! It's safe again. You can start back reading if you were skipping the TW. Welcome back
At this point, after having been TTC for 14 months, I'd take a baby whenever. Like someone else said: if you start looking for reasons to pick another month you'll find endless amounts of reasons. Maybe you don't want morning sickness during the your favorite season. Maybe you don't want to be very pregnant in the heat of the summer. Maybe you don't want to be very pregnant during the icy winter. Maybe you don't want to be pregnant around a certain holiday or certain birthdays. Perhaps you have your heart set of dressing up your bump in a pregnancy Halloween costume (although, if we're being honest, if you admit to this I'll have a good laugh about it.) The list just goes on and on when it comes to "reasons."
First of all @Everycol0r that is the most terrifying/disturbing gif I have ever seen. I can't unsee it.
Second, I'm with all these lovely ladies...IDGAF about due date/month. DH was born a month early because his mom had to be induced for preeclampsia. I decided to join the world two weeks early. On my dad's 29th birthday. Babies do things on their own schedule, as do our bodies and the sooner you realize that and give up on micromanaging, the happier you're likely to be.
First of all @Everycol0r that is the most terrifying/disturbing gif I have ever seen. I can't unsee it.
Second, I'm with all these lovely ladies...IDGAF about due date/month. DH was born a month early because his mom had to be induced for preeclampsia. I decided to join the world two weeks early. On my dad's 29th birthday. Babies do things on their own schedule, as do our bodies and the sooner you realize that and give up on micromanaging, the happier you're likely to be.
*lurker out*
I've got more where that came from. Just ask around
LFAF February Siggy Challenge - "Favorite TV/Movie Couple"
I'll bite on this one OP - I have an interesting work situation. I work 60 hrs/week on average for 1/2 the year and then 30 on average the rest. There is talk about bumping our summer hours down to 16. We haven't hit the time in this TTC cycle where we need to make a decision yet, but there would have to be a discussion between DH and myself if we hit a window where I would give birth, say, in June. It would really, really suck to use my entire maternity leave over the summer when I work much, much less (potentially only 2 days starting this year). With that said, I would never TTA based on having a "holiday baby", same month as "X" person's birthday, etc.
If your maternity leave is FMLA, you can use that whenever you want. Just so you know. You can go back to work and then take the 12 weeks off later.
Yep, I know, but there's no way I wouldn't take 12 weeks with an infant. No way. I breastfeed and I think 12 weeks is the bare minimum to solidify that relationship/ensure a good supply. I also 100% agree with the "4th trimester" and the benefits for both mom and baby of uninterrupted time. 12 weeks is pitiful.
In fact, a pregnancy for me this month would have birth falling around thanksgiving and next month would mean Christmas, getting me out of holidays with my in laws...
Yes this! Totally sitting here thinking that if we get pregnant this month or in the next few I totally won't have to travel up north for any holidays next year. I really don't like spending Christmas at my I laws (we alternate years for now)
***TW: Loss mentioned*** I was pregnant and suffered a MC in January for what would have been an August baby. I just remember when we told my mom about the baby and loss she was sad because a summer baby would've been so nice (obviously she was upset in general too). Everyone in my immediate family and DH's family has fall/winter birthdays. But seriously, at that time I couldn't gaf about when it was due. If we would conceive this cycle it would put us right around early December. Both my mom and MIL have the same birthday in early December. Should it be that same day as well, IDGAF. That would actually be kinda cool in my opinion.
Me: 26 & DH: 25
Married: August 2014 TTC since November 2015 BFP #1 12/17/15 - MC 1/28/16 BFP #2 4/22/16 - EDD 12/30/16
I'll bite on this one OP - I have an interesting work situation. I work 60 hrs/week on average for 1/2 the year and then 30 on average the rest. There is talk about bumping our summer hours down to 16. We haven't hit the time in this TTC cycle where we need to make a decision yet, but there would have to be a discussion between DH and myself if we hit a window where I would give birth, say, in June. It would really, really suck to use my entire maternity leave over the summer when I work much, much less (potentially only 2 days starting this year). With that said, I would never TTA based on having a "holiday baby", same month as "X" person's birthday, etc.
If your maternity leave is FMLA, you can use that whenever you want. Just so you know. You can go back to work and then take the 12 weeks off later.
Yep, I know, but there's no way I wouldn't take 12 weeks with an infant. No way. I breastfeed and I think 12 weeks is the bare minimum to solidify that relationship/ensure a good supply. I also 100% agree with the "4th trimester" and the benefits for both mom and baby of uninterrupted time. 12 weeks is pitiful.
Alrighty then
LFAF February Siggy Challenge - "Favorite TV/Movie Couple"
Sorry for your loss, OP. In theory, I get some people trying to plan a general time frame because of work/school/travel etc. But, theres comes a point, at different times for different people, that you just don't care anymore and you just want to have a H&H ANY 9 months.
**TW-child mentioned** my son's birthday is in March. I never thought I would say this but I'm actually a little offended that people would consider that a potentially bad thing. that's not on you, OP, but on many people I guess. **TW over **
Its kind of like when an old co-worker told me that her daughter, who was about 2 at the time, was leaning toward being left handed and how disappointed she was about it... I'm a lefty, am I flawed or something? My MIL actually forced DH and our DNe (who she is basically raising) to be right-handed when they were naturally lefties. Its wrong and it ticks me off.
My point is, no, most people are not going to be planning their projected/hoped-for birth month. As most people do not see being born during a certain time of year to be a flaw.
I recommend lurking more and asking questions like this over on the trimester boards. It will be much better received there.
Angel Babies 1&2 2/14/09 DS born 3/11 Angel Baby 3 6/28/11 9/5/17 BFP!! divorced October 2014 9/6/17 hCG 88 progesterone 9.1 (prometrium started) Married DH 10/15 DH's DS born 6/09 9/8/17 hCG 242!!! Not preventing since 11/15 EDD 5/8/18 Adjusted 5/15/18 TTC since 1/1/16 9/27/17 we have a heart beat!
If I got pregnant this cycle I'd be due right around Thanksgiving, my sister's birthday, and the time DH's company will hopefully start shipping product FOR THE FIRST TIME. And you know what, I'll be happy as FUCK about that due date.
**TW: recent birth discussed** Andplusalso, my niece was just born on December 26. It looked like she'd be a Christmas baby for a while there. You know who is upset about that? Exactly no one. In fact, we're all thrilled, especially my sister who had to go through over 6 years of crap to get to that point.
Me: 30 DH: 32 ~~ TTC #1: Sep 2015 ~~ BFP: Mar 2016 ~~ Daughter: Nov 2016 TTC #2: April 2018 ~~ BFP: May 2018 ~~ EDD: January 2019
Will fully admit that I thought about it (I'm a December baby and have always complained). But, DH asked if we were going to TTA this month and I said "hell no." I'm happy for a healthy and happy baby no matter what the month. August babies get to have summer birthdays, but anecdotally, I've heard from relatives and friends that they sometimes have a harder time in school at the beginning because they are younger whereas winter babies have more time to mature before school but are more susceptible to RSV and other cold weather issues in Northern climates. Not trying to stir the pot here, but pointing out that really there are pros and cons to every birth month.
Early December baby here and no complaints about it being in the same month as Christmas. Actually, I wasn't even supposed to be born in December, my original DD was Valentines Day but apparently I was impatient and decided to show up a few days shy of 30 weeks.
Babies...bodies....mother nature...can't be controlled.
Together 2007 | Married 2011 | Me: 36 | DH: 38 Adopted Furbaby: 2014 TTC#1 : 1/2016 | IUI #2 - BFP 12/24/16 -- born 9/8/17 TTC#2: 11/2019 | Dx DOR (AMH 0.3), AMA IUI #2 - BFP 7/1/20 -- EDD 3/14/21
OP, sorry for your loss. I too am recently trying again.
@littlemisstimelord, you are a genius! How did I not think to just put the whole year of conception/due date combos on my phone?! I know that's not what you were trying to get across there, but that's a pro tip.
I'll weigh in with this....
If I got pregnant this month/next month, I would probably spend an entire two weeks on THE most expensive trip I have ever planned puking my guts up. Long flights, layovers, cruise motion and all. I would have a newborn around Thanksgiving or Christmas, which means I will probably get stuck having to see MORE family than I want to. I would be pregnant over summer and the deathly August heat in Florida.... My travel towards the end of the year would be restricted at my all time favorite part of the year to go and see mountains.
And I would be SO FREAKING HAPPY that I don't care about any of that. Obviously we are all different, but I will take "good problems" any day of the week if it means I get a healthy baby at the end.
I agree with PP's but for the sake of answering the question in an objective way, i'll say that DH is really weirded out about the possibility of a Christmas baby because hes convinced it would hate us for making it share a birthday with a holiday. Of course thats irrational and i'll take a baby any time of the year but DH is wortied about stuff like that. Me, ive always been irrationally freaked out about having an August baby because my very abusive ex was a Leo and my irrational self was convinced it has something to do with it. However, my very swe brother is a Leo and is an absolute doll. So yes DH and I both had bizzare reservations about certain months for no good reason but we desperately want a baby regardless of the birth month.
Met DH - 9/2003
Dating - 9/18/2012
Married - 8/16/2014
NTNP - 7/2014-5/2015
TTC #1 - 5/2015 (CP October @ 4w2d)
*PCOS/Hypothyroid/Ectopic Kidney/High DHEA-S* HSG - All clear, ectopic kidney didn't affect uterus (yay!) CT Adrenal Scan - no tumors! SA - sperm count excellent, 2% Morphology March/April IUI scheduled - surprise BFP w/ help of Progesterone - 3/18/2016 Beta #1 @ 11dpo - 45.7 #2 @ 14dpo - 163 #3 @ 18dpo - 997 #4 @ 21dpo - 3799 EDD 12/1 based on O, 11/28 per Ob/Gyn (but he's wrong lol).
Our ideal birthmonth is actually December/January for a few reasons (obviously we're happy whenever, but these would be best case scenario):
We live 8 hours from my folks (and get to see my fam quite often) but 22 hours from his (and only get to see his fam for Christmas). If baby is born around Christmas, that means baby gets to spend their birthday with my partner's family each year instead of maybe once every few years.
Bonus, we get to skip out on Thanksgiving and/or Christmas for a year. Love our families, but that season is exhausting for the amount of travel we have to do.
I work in a software company that specializes in education. Due to the nature of our product, we are DEAD in Dec/Jan. I send my team home early almost every day in the winter. I'm at the point in my career where it's much better to be absent on slow days than miss the busy season.
He works in nonprofit development, and his busy time of year ends in November.
Saves me from having to commute to work in the snowy Midwest for 12 weeks.
Super cute little newborn Christmas sweaters and outfits.
I'm a winter baby and I turned out great!
That being said, whenever we hopefully get knocked up, I will find an additional list of 7 reasons why our due month and the months surrounding it are the best case scenario for our baby to be born.
Oh yeah I forgot to mention that if I were to get pregnant this month (which, let's be honest that isn't happening because we totally failed timing BD this month) I'd be due within a week of Thanksgiving, our wedding anniversary and DH's birthday. So that's a lot going on and I'd still love to add a baby birthday to that list.
Me: 28 Husband: 31 TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016 Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
Naive me wanted a summer baby and thought we'd totes get KTFU on the first try. Aaaand, here we are six months later. Like everyone else, I will be happy with a healthy boy or girl, born on any day of the year.
My question is, have you thought about the month, and skipped trying a month because of an undesirable birth date?
DH and I had a conversation about this a couple months ago because he was set to deploy next summer through winter. We wondered if we should TTA and time things so that EDD would be after he would get back from deployment. The conversation didn't last long, as we're having TTTC, and decided that it would suck if he wouldn't be able to be there for the birth and newborn phase, but at least we would have a healthy child to love. *Goes back to lurking*
Honorable mentions: Biggest IF support sister, sweetest bumpie, most genuine, LFAFer you'd most like to visit, great things come in small packages, pocket sized babe
Another lurker here. I have a lot of experience with winter/holiday birthdays.
*TW: loss and children mentioned*
My first pregnancy I was due a couple weeks before Thanksgiving. Unfortunately that ended with an early MC. I ended up pregnant again with a due date of January 11, but DS showed up unexpectedly 3 days before Christmas. I left the hospital Christmas Eve morning. A couple years later I ended up pregnant again, due on Thanksgiving. My DD was 5 days late, but her birthday was on Thanksgiving when she turned 2. I am a December baby myself, with a birthday a week before Christmas and my older brother is Christmas day baby. I never minded it at all and it's really not that big a deal with my kids. You just make sure to keep birthdays and Christmas separate. Even for my brother, we would do Christmas in the morning and his birthday celebration, with presents in birthday paper and birthday cake, in the afternoon. You make it work. With two kids now with birthdays at the holidays it would be nice to time our 3rd child to a different time of year. It's expensive to have so many gifts to buy at once, and it is extra stuff to do at a busy time of year.
That said we decided to start TTC this month because we are ready and really, why wait? I'm only getting older and I know too well that it simply is not in my control. If I end up pregnant this cycle or next I will be thrilled, even though that means 3 kids with holiday birthdays.
In the end, all I really want is a baby. Can you imagine yourself with a baby in your arms, upset that they were born at the wrong time? No, because it's ridiculous. And it's ridiculous really to worry about it when TTC
I'm doing the exact opposite. I'm totally justifying why every month would be a GREAT month for a newborn. Right now I'm all 'December! Festive! Cozy! Tiny little Christmas sleepers!'
So, no.
Andplusalso:
Ermagherd.
Me: 32 DH: 33 Married: October 2015 TTC #1: October 2015 EDD #1: June/July 2017
My daughter was born in November. 11/12/13. Cool birthday, right? Well, her birth was extremely traumatic. She came out not breathing. I had a placental abruption and almost bled out. Turned out my newborn baby was born with a critical heart defect. She needed emergency care and needed an emergency balloon catheterization to open up her aortic valve that was completely shut when she was born. She spent her first 12 days in the hospital. I quickly developed PPD. I cried all day, everyday. I was stuck at home with a baby, whose future was (still is) so uncertain. It was too cold to ever take her anywhere and my PPD was so bad I didn't feel like going anywhere but outside. It was the worst winter of my life.
@HeartMama2013 First, I'm so sorry to hear about what you went through. Second, I'm a little confused about your post. Are you considering TTA to avoid another November/Devember baby because of your last experience?
me . early 30's | h . mid 30's | < 3 . 2013
ntnp #2 . summer 2018
*siggy warning*
ttc#1 . jul 2015
mmc . mar 2016 | 6w2d
dx PCOS (non-IR) / subclinical hypothyroidism . summer 2016
tx metformin, levothyroxine, LP progesterone, femara + trigger + ti . fall/winter 2016 BFP! . jan 2017 DD . oct 2017
My daughter was born in November. 11/12/13. Cool birthday, right? Well, her birth was extremely traumatic. She came out not breathing. I had a placental abruption and almost bled out. Turned out my newborn baby was born with a critical heart defect. She needed emergency care and needed an emergency balloon catheterization to open up her aortic valve that was completely shut when she was born. She spent her first 12 days in the hospital. I quickly developed PPD. I cried all day, everyday. I was stuck at home with a baby, whose future was (still is) so uncertain. It was too cold to ever take her anywhere and my PPD was so bad I didn't feel like going anywhere but outside. It was the worst winter of my life.
*** End of TW ***
I'm also wondering what exactly this has to do with tta for birth months. Eta. I'm very sorry it was so tough and you had such a rough go of it. I hope your daughter is okay.
TTC1: May 2015
Primary IF May 2016; Failed HSG; Scheduled Lap Sept. 2016
OP. As you can see this isn't a well received topic and for a variety of reasons. I do think though that it's a natural thought when first venturing into the thoughts of ttc. When we first started, we considered when to go off the pill based on a few topics. With living overseas, my maternity leave not being "movable" (it's 45 days from date of birth period), and wanting my mom here as well as being able to travel home while on maternity leave if I could, we planned our ttc month perfectly. Assuming of course it would happen right away. Based on that, I'd have had my perfectly timed baby a month ago. We are still ttc. We then considered tta based on a trip to South Africa in August. We decided against tta and continued ttc. We're still ttc and still going to South Africa. Don't base your ttc on specific months. At this point, I don't care if I have my final trimester in the 120 degrees of summer with zero maternity leave (because it'd be summer holiday anyway) and no one in my family could come. (I'd be sad about my mom not coming) but I'd just be happy to get pregnant. Nothing wrong with preferring a certain time of year, but don't base everything around that
TTC1: May 2015
Primary IF May 2016; Failed HSG; Scheduled Lap Sept. 2016
@HeartMama2013 First, I'm so sorry to hear about what you went through. Second, I'm a little confused about your post. Are you considering TTA to avoid another November/Devember baby because of your last experience?
I'm sorry! Yes. We are TTA having another November/December baby because of my experience.
My daughter was born in November. 11/12/13. Cool birthday, right? Well, her birth was extremely traumatic. She came out not breathing. I had a placental abruption and almost bled out. Turned out my newborn baby was born with a critical heart defect. She needed emergency care and needed an emergency balloon catheterization to open up her aortic valve that was completely shut when she was born. She spent her first 12 days in the hospital. I quickly developed PPD. I cried all day, everyday. I was stuck at home with a baby, whose future was (still is) so uncertain. It was too cold to ever take her anywhere and my PPD was so bad I didn't feel like going anywhere but outside. It was the worst winter of my life.
*** End of TW ***
I'm also wondering what exactly this has to do with tta for birth months. Eta. I'm very sorry it was so tough and you had such a rough go of it. I hope your daughter is okay.
Because of my last experience, we are TTA having another winter baby. We live in Mn and not being able to go for walks when I was crawling out of my skin indoors made my PPD SO much worse. The first time I was able to bring her outside for more than just going to the store or the mall or someone's house, I cried from relief. I literally felt like I had been set free.
Thank you. Overall, she is doing well. Her heart is still in poor shape. Her cardiologist has been dropping the "T" word (transplant) at her last few appts. It does not function well.
This is a crazy post, clearly from a person who hasn't been trying for long. I am surprised that OP would still feel this way after a loss, but I don't know her life I guess.
I got pregnant at a pretty bad time with #1...my due date was 10 days after my sister's out of state wedding date, which was scheduled before I started TTC. I gave no fucks. And my pregnant ass still made it to the wedding.
Even if you get a "desirable" due date, it kind of means nothing...babies can come several weeks early or even two weeks late. Let go of your need to plan anything before having kids. I laugh at my prior self in that regard almost daily now. DD thinks schedules are hilarious and has never dealt with having a schedule of any kind. Other than the fact that she was born the day before she was due, you can't plan a damn thing with her. And I still wouldn't change a thing.
We are trying to avoid having a baby until after September 2017 because of my work schedule and me finishing my masters degree. After that, we are very flexible with when we have a baby. I don't really care about other things because life will always happen and some thing will come up.
I agree with PP's but for the sake of answering the question in an objective way, i'll say that DH is really weirded out about the possibility of a Christmas baby because hes convinced it would hate us for making it share a birthday with a holiday. Of course thats irrational and i'll take a baby any time of the year but DH is wortied about stuff like that.
--snipped--
The good thing is if the child does resent you over it, you can just calmly explain that if you would have TTA this month, that would have meant different egg and different sperm, therefore different child.
The good thing is if the child does resent you over it, you can just calmly explain that if you would have TTA this month, that would have meant different egg and different sperm, therefore different child.
Ahhhhhhh, you just trudged up a forgotten memory of me talking to my dad about some sort of timing thing like that when I was a kid. When he explained the different egg + different sperm = I don't exist, I was all
@TheJerilu@e=mc21 - My mother had a miscarriage about a year before I was born. She used to always tell me that it was a terrible thing, but it gave her the best gift ever: me. And as I child I used to think, "no, I'd still exist, I'd just be a year older"....yeah...that's not how things work.
** December BMB Siggy Challenge - Animals in Pools **
Me: 31+ H: 32 TTC Since 11/2015 #1 - MMC 6.5 weeks (2/16); #2 - MC due to cystic hygroma at 20 weeks (10/16); #3 CP (2/17); #4 - Due 12.16.17
Re: Planning Birth Month - Yes or No?
Andplusalso:
perspective.
Together since 2008, married Sept 2013
ttc #1 since July 2014
DX: unexplained infertility
Sept, Oct, Nov Clomid 50 mg: BFN
Feb 2016 IUI w/ 50mg Clomid, Ovidrel, Prometrium: BFN
March 2016 IUI w/ 50mg Clomid, Ovidrel, Prometrium: BFN
June 2016 IVF: BFP 6/28!!! beta #1: 358, beta #2: 1428, beta #3: 3742
Married May 2012
TTC#1 July 2013 - July 2015 (no success)
Again TTC#1: Dec 2015
First RE visit: Feb 2016
BFP: 9/16/16 EDD:5/26/17
Most of us on here would give anything for our BFP and a healthy/happy baby any day any time EVER.
ME: 31 | DH: 31
Married: April 2015
TTC (BBT & FF) #1: April 2015 (Off BC: January 2015)
Fur Baby: 1 English Mastiff (Rupert)
I'll take ANY baby, ANY month.
IUI August 2016 : Cancelled due to polyp
September 2016: Polyp removal/hysteroscopy
October 2016: IUI #1- BFN
November 2016: IUI #2- BFN
December 2016: IUI #3 - BFN
January/February 2017 - IVF + ICSI + PGD
March 2017 - FET
When I first started TTC I hadn't honestly really thought about when would be the best months to have a baby. I hadn't really considered that certain months would make for an easier pregnancy in one way or another. I just wanted a baby and figured pregnancy would be uncomfortable during any 9 months of the year.
**TW: Loss mentioned**
When I got pregnant back in October I was absolutely over the moon. It wasn't till I made it to my BMB that I realized people put way too much thought into which 9 months they'll be pregnant and what baby's EDD is. Like seriously I ever heard ladies complain about things like "I really wanted to be very visibly pregnant for Halloween so I could dress my bump up as a pumpkin/do a bun in the oven costume/ etc." I heard ladies complain about how difficult it was going to be to be very pregnant during the heat of the summer. I heard ladies complain about how fall is their favorite time of year and now they'll have morning sickness through part of it so they won't be able to enjoy it. I heard complaints about how it would be hard to hide a pregnancy while visiting family for the holidays. The list goes on and on and on... I remember I started to become ever so slightly concerned that these are all things I didn't think about before hand but then decided "ya know what, I'm just glad I'm pregnant." And then I have the absolutely soul-crushing experience that is a MC.
****************
OK! It's safe again. You can start back reading if you were skipping the TW. Welcome back
At this point, after having been TTC for 14 months, I'd take a baby whenever. Like someone else said: if you start looking for reasons to pick another month you'll find endless amounts of reasons. Maybe you don't want morning sickness during the your favorite season. Maybe you don't want to be very pregnant in the heat of the summer. Maybe you don't want to be very pregnant during the icy winter. Maybe you don't want to be pregnant around a certain holiday or certain birthdays. Perhaps you have your heart set of dressing up your bump in a pregnancy Halloween costume (although, if we're being honest, if you admit to this I'll have a good laugh about it.) The list just goes on and on when it comes to "reasons."
Basically I can't say this any better than @LittleMissTimeLord did:
TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016
Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss
Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
Baby #2 due June 12, 2018
First of all @Everycol0r that is the most terrifying/disturbing gif I have ever seen. I can't unsee it.
Second, I'm with all these lovely ladies...IDGAF about due date/month. DH was born a month early because his mom had to be induced for preeclampsia. I decided to join the world two weeks early. On my dad's 29th birthday. Babies do things on their own schedule, as do our bodies and the sooner you realize that and give up on micromanaging, the happier you're likely to be.
*lurker out*
LFAF February Siggy Challenge - "Favorite TV/Movie Couple"
DD: 10/17/13
TTC#2 Actively: 10/14, NTNP: 01/14
Left-Sided Hydrosalpinx (cause: genetic abnormality, TREATED 11/16)
http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/396b04
edited for autocorrect mishaps
I was pregnant and suffered a MC in January for what would have been an August baby. I just remember when we told my mom about the baby and loss she was sad because a summer baby would've been so nice (obviously she was upset in general too). Everyone in my immediate family and DH's family has fall/winter birthdays. But seriously, at that time I couldn't gaf about when it was due. If we would conceive this cycle it would put us right around early December. Both my mom and MIL have the same birthday in early December. Should it be that same day as well, IDGAF. That would actually be kinda cool in my opinion.
TTC since November 2015
BFP #1 12/17/15 - MC 1/28/16
BFP #2 4/22/16 - EDD 12/30/16
That is all.
TTC since January 2016
BFP - 3/12/16 - MC 4/5/16
BFP - 6/11/16
LFAF February Siggy Challenge - "Favorite TV/Movie Couple"
DD: 10/17/13
TTC#2 Actively: 10/14, NTNP: 01/14
Left-Sided Hydrosalpinx (cause: genetic abnormality, TREATED 11/16)
http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/396b04
**TW-child mentioned** my son's birthday is in March. I never thought I would say this but I'm actually a little offended that people would consider that a potentially bad thing. that's not on you, OP, but on many people I guess.
**TW over **
Its kind of like when an old co-worker told me that her daughter, who was about 2 at the time, was leaning toward being left handed and how disappointed she was about it... I'm a lefty, am I flawed or something? My MIL actually forced DH and our DNe (who she is basically raising) to be right-handed when they were naturally lefties. Its wrong and it ticks me off.
My point is, no, most people are not going to be planning their projected/hoped-for birth month. As most people do not see being born during a certain time of year to be a flaw.
I recommend lurking more and asking questions like this over on the trimester boards. It will be much better received there.
DS born 3/11
Angel Baby 3 6/28/11 9/5/17 BFP!!
divorced October 2014 9/6/17 hCG 88 progesterone 9.1 (prometrium started)
Married DH 10/15 DH's DS born 6/09 9/8/17 hCG 242!!!
Not preventing since 11/15 EDD 5/8/18 Adjusted 5/15/18
TTC since 1/1/16 9/27/17 we have a heart beat!
If I got pregnant this cycle I'd be due right around Thanksgiving, my sister's birthday, and the time DH's company will hopefully start shipping product FOR THE FIRST TIME. And you know what, I'll be happy as FUCK about that due date.
**TW: recent birth discussed**
Andplusalso, my niece was just born on December 26. It looked like she'd be a Christmas baby for a while there. You know who is upset about that? Exactly no one. In fact, we're all thrilled, especially my sister who had to go through over 6 years of crap to get to that point.
TTC #2: April 2018 ~~ BFP: May 2018 ~~ EDD: January 2019
Babies...bodies....mother nature...can't be controlled.
Adopted Furbaby: 2014
TTC#1 : 1/2016 | IUI #2 - BFP 12/24/16 -- born 9/8/17
TTC#2: 11/2019 | Dx DOR (AMH 0.3), AMA
IUI #2 - BFP 7/1/20 -- EDD 3/14/21
@littlemisstimelord, you are a genius! How did I not think to just put the whole year of conception/due date combos on my phone?! I know that's not what you were trying to get across there, but that's a pro tip.
I'll weigh in with this....
If I got pregnant this month/next month, I would probably spend an entire two weeks on THE most expensive trip I have ever planned puking my guts up. Long flights, layovers, cruise motion and all.
I would have a newborn around Thanksgiving or Christmas, which means I will probably get stuck having to see MORE family than I want to.
I would be pregnant over summer and the deathly August heat in Florida....
My travel towards the end of the year would be restricted at my all time favorite part of the year to go and see mountains.
And I would be SO FREAKING HAPPY that I don't care about any of that. Obviously we are all different, but I will take "good problems" any day of the week if it means I get a healthy baby at the end.
HSG - All clear, ectopic kidney didn't affect uterus (yay!)
CT Adrenal Scan - no tumors!
SA - sperm count excellent, 2% Morphology
March/April IUI scheduled - surprise BFP w/ help of Progesterone - 3/18/2016
Beta #1 @ 11dpo - 45.7 #2 @ 14dpo - 163 #3 @ 18dpo - 997 #4 @ 21dpo - 3799
EDD 12/1 based on O, 11/28 per Ob/Gyn (but he's wrong lol).
*TEAM BLUE!*
TEAM: PINK!!
Our ideal birthmonth is actually December/January for a few reasons (obviously we're happy whenever, but these would be best case scenario):
- We live 8 hours from my folks (and get to see my fam quite often) but 22 hours from his (and only get to see his fam for Christmas). If baby is born around Christmas, that means baby gets to spend their birthday with my partner's family each year instead of maybe once every few years.
- Bonus, we get to skip out on Thanksgiving and/or Christmas for a year. Love our families, but that season is exhausting for the amount of travel we have to do.
- I work in a software company that specializes in education. Due to the nature of our product, we are DEAD in Dec/Jan. I send my team home early almost every day in the winter. I'm at the point in my career where it's much better to be absent on slow days than miss the busy season.
- He works in nonprofit development, and his busy time of year ends in November.
- Saves me from having to commute to work in the snowy Midwest for 12 weeks.
- Super cute little newborn Christmas sweaters and outfits.
- I'm a winter baby and I turned out great!
That being said, whenever we hopefully get knocked up, I will find an additional list of 7 reasons why our due month and the months surrounding it are the best case scenario for our baby to be born.Me: 28 & Partner: 32 | Married 2014
BFP 7/29 EDD 4/11
Ds1 was born Jan 2nd. So right after xmas and day after NYD.
DS2 was born Nov 24. 2 days before thanksgiving. Some years his birthday will land ON thanksgiving.
My kids being born in the heart of the holiday season simply made the holidays even more special and we have some wonderful memories because of it.
TTC#1: January 2015- September 2016
Infertility, Recurrent Pregnancy Loss
Rainbow baby born June 6, 2017 ❤️
Baby #2 due June 12, 2018
I would love a healthy, happy baby any day of the year.
then 3 failed IUIs, and finally a successful IVF FET.
Due with #2 5/2/19 after HIO once in my FW,
because apparently that's how life works now. Team Blue!
Naive me wanted a summer baby and thought we'd totes get KTFU on the first try. Aaaand, here we are six months later. Like everyone else, I will be happy with a healthy boy or girl, born on any day of the year.
*Goes back to lurking*
3/2015: Start TTC
8/2015: PCOS Dx
4/2016: BFP, Loss (4+5)
2/2017: BFP
Honorable mentions: Biggest IF support sister, sweetest bumpie, most genuine, LFAFer you'd most like to visit, great things come in small packages, pocket sized babe
*TW: loss and children mentioned*
My first pregnancy I was due a couple weeks before Thanksgiving. Unfortunately that ended with an early MC. I ended up pregnant again with a due date of January 11, but DS showed up unexpectedly 3 days before Christmas. I left the hospital Christmas Eve morning. A couple years later I ended up pregnant again, due on Thanksgiving. My DD was 5 days late, but her birthday was on Thanksgiving when she turned 2.
I am a December baby myself, with a birthday a week before Christmas and my older brother is Christmas day baby. I never minded it at all and it's really not that big a deal with my kids. You just make sure to keep birthdays and Christmas separate. Even for my brother, we would do Christmas in the morning and his birthday celebration, with presents in birthday paper and birthday cake, in the afternoon. You make it work.
With two kids now with birthdays at the holidays it would be nice to time our 3rd child to a different time of year. It's expensive to have so many gifts to buy at once, and it is extra stuff to do at a busy time of year.
That said we decided to start TTC this month because we are ready and really, why wait? I'm only getting older and I know too well that it simply is not in my control. If I end up pregnant this cycle or next I will be thrilled, even though that means 3 kids with holiday birthdays.
In the end, all I really want is a baby. Can you imagine yourself with a baby in your arms, upset that they were born at the wrong time? No, because it's ridiculous. And it's ridiculous really to worry about it when TTC
DH: 33
Married: October 2015
TTC #1: October 2015
EDD #1: June/July 2017
***TW Warning: DD anPPD***
My daughter was born in November. 11/12/13. Cool birthday, right? Well, her birth was extremely traumatic. She came out not breathing. I had a placental abruption and almost bled out. Turned out my newborn baby was born with a critical heart defect. She needed emergency care and needed an emergency balloon catheterization to open up her aortic valve that was completely shut when she was born. She spent her first 12 days in the hospital. I quickly developed PPD. I cried all day, everyday. I was stuck at home with a baby, whose future was (still is) so uncertain. It was too cold to ever take her anywhere and my PPD was so bad I didn't feel like going anywhere but outside. It was the worst winter of my life.
*** End of TW ***
ntnp #2 . summer 2018
*siggy warning*
ttc#1 . jul 2015
mmc . mar 2016 | 6w2d
dx PCOS (non-IR) / subclinical hypothyroidism . summer 2016
tx metformin, levothyroxine, LP progesterone, femara + trigger + ti . fall/winter 2016
BFP! . jan 2017
DD . oct 2017
Eta. I'm very sorry it was so tough and you had such a rough go of it. I hope your daughter is okay.
When we first started, we considered when to go off the pill based on a few topics. With living overseas, my maternity leave not being "movable" (it's 45 days from date of birth period), and wanting my mom here as well as being able to travel home while on maternity leave if I could, we planned our ttc month perfectly. Assuming of course it would happen right away. Based on that, I'd have had my perfectly timed baby a month ago. We are still ttc.
We then considered tta based on a trip to South Africa in August. We decided against tta and continued ttc. We're still ttc and still going to South Africa. Don't base your ttc on specific months.
At this point, I don't care if I have my final trimester in the 120 degrees of summer with zero maternity leave (because it'd be summer holiday anyway) and no one in my family could come. (I'd be sad about my mom not coming) but I'd just be happy to get pregnant.
Nothing wrong with preferring a certain time of year, but don't base everything around that
I'm sorry! Yes. We are TTA having another November/December baby because of my experience.
Because of my last experience, we are TTA having another winter baby. We live in Mn and not being able to go for walks when I was crawling out of my skin indoors made my PPD SO much worse. The first time I was able to bring her outside for more than just going to the store or the mall or someone's house, I cried from relief. I literally felt like I had been set free.
Thank you. Overall, she is doing well. Her heart is still in poor shape. Her cardiologist has been dropping the "T" word (transplant) at her last few appts. It does not function well.
I got pregnant at a pretty bad time with #1...my due date was 10 days after my sister's out of state wedding date, which was scheduled before I started TTC. I gave no fucks. And my pregnant ass still made it to the wedding.
Even if you get a "desirable" due date, it kind of means nothing...babies can come several weeks early or even two weeks late. Let go of your need to plan anything before having kids. I laugh at my prior self in that regard almost daily now. DD thinks schedules are hilarious and has never dealt with having a schedule of any kind. Other than the fact that she was born the day before she was due, you can't plan a damn thing with her. And I still wouldn't change a thing.
I haven't been at this long, but it took me just a hot minute to realize that would be stupid.
Me - 33 DH - 30
Married May 2015
TTC #1 since January 2016
BFP 03/14/16
EDD 11/22/16
Ahhhhhhh, you just trudged up a forgotten memory of me talking to my dad about some sort of timing thing like that when I was a kid. When he explained the different egg + different sperm = I don't exist, I was all
Me: 28 & Partner: 32 | Married 2014
BFP 7/29 EDD 4/11
** December BMB Siggy Challenge - Animals in Pools **
Me: 31+ H: 32
TTC Since 11/2015
#1 - MMC 6.5 weeks (2/16); #2 - MC due to cystic hygroma at 20 weeks (10/16); #3 CP (2/17); #4 - Due 12.16.17