2nd Trimester

Anyone else struggling with feeling fat?!

this might make me sound like a bad mum to be, and I know growing a human is a miracle and a wondrous thing - but am I the only one struggling with the belly and not feeling comfortable / good in anything ?! I can't seem to get wheel maternity style down and it frustrates me every day 

Re: Anyone else struggling with feeling fat?!

  • I'm right there with you! I went to a waterpark resort a few weeks ago and I felt soooo self-conscious in my swim suit, and pretty much in general. I feel like I'm still at that point where I don't really look pregnant; I just sort of look fat. I'm pretty sure most women go through this phase in their pregnancies. My advice is to try to find loose-fitting, flowy tops and some good maternity jeans/leggings, as well as looser dresses. After you have the baby, your body might go back to about where it's at now, so it's good to get some clothes figured out that work with your body now. 
    Me: 25  DH: 28

    Hubby's little boy - my wonderful step-son - born 5/23/10
    BFP#1: 06/2010...my beautiful baby girl born 3/7/2011
    BFP #2: 10/24/15...mc on 10/31/15
    BFP #3: 11/27/15. EDD 8/6/16

    "Success is going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm." -Winston Churchill
  • I felt like that at first but I feel like once I finally popped and I went from looking 'chubby' to obviously 'pregnant' I felt soooo much better about myself.  Now I'm 35 weeks pregnant and I actually like my baby belly.  It sucks seeing the number go up on the scale and knowing that after delivery I'm going to go back to looking chubby, but I think once you get to that phase where you're actually round and bubbly you'll feel better about it.
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  • I'm right there with you! I went to a waterpark resort a few weeks ago and I felt soooo self-conscious in my swim suit, and pretty much in general. I feel like I'm still at that point where I don't really look pregnant; I just sort of look fat. I'm pretty sure most women go through this phase in their pregnancies. My advice is to try to find loose-fitting, flowy tops and some good maternity jeans/leggings, as well as looser dresses. After you have the baby, your body might go back to about where it's at now, so it's good to get some clothes figured out that work with your body now. 
    Yes, I hate that phase. Once I really look pregnant, I don't mind at all, but I hate people thinking I'm just really out of shape in the meantime. I have felt like I lookreally pregnant for the past few weeks and then I ran into someone who didn't know I was. When I told her, she said I didn't look pregnant at all. (19 weeks, STM, in maternity pants for over a month now). Maybe people still do think I'm just fat? Bugs me some, but what can you do?
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  • charmedlifex3charmedlifex3 member
    edited March 2016

    I am apparently the exception that proves the rule that FTM's don't "show." It's been BA-BOOM belly. I guess I am lucky I haven't yet really gained anything else, any where else, but to some degree that just emphasizes the beach ball on my front. I'm starting to adjust to it (and grow my maternity wardrobe.) but the suddenness of getting so much belly has been a mental shock. People (perfect strangers!) keep asking me how far along I am, then acting surprised when I tell them August. Thanks.

    I started saying "This summer!" instead.




  • I definitely feel like I just look fat, not pregnant, and I have a lot of bump jealousy! I used to be overweight and I feel like I just look like I did then. DH says I look pregnant to him, but he didn't know me when I was overweight. Really looking forward to actually looking pregnant. Hopefully only a few more weeks of this. 

    Married May 2014
    DD born August 2016
    Baby #2 due December 2017
  • I felt like this at the doctors office this week, they have a mirror right by the exam table, why would that ever be a good place for a pregnant woman to lean over and look at her self. I will say my "looking fat and not pregnant", kind of ended right around 20-21 weeks, belly just showed up but I still get those feelings of feeling like a healthy over-weight person. 
  • I was kind of self conscious till I had an actual belly. Now, as much as I hate lugging this thing around, I actually feel like I look cute. My belly is MASSIVE, but the rest of me looks perfectly normal.

    Wait till you get to the cuter stage, you will feel better about yourself. 

    And if you skip that stage- you are MAKING A HUMAN!! Cut yourself a break. Shit is hard. :)
  • I am struggling with it this time for sure. The funny thing is, last time I was heavier. This time, I was in the best shape of my life when I got pregnant, and I'm really struggling with gaining weight. I've gained a lot too, despite working out every day and still eating pretty damn good. I'm trying to stay positive, but it's hard. I think it is important to know though, that it is only temporary! I heard so many stories that once you have a baby, you never go back. Well, yes, my boobs are a little bit more saggy and I have a few very faint stretch marks near my belly button, but like I said, I got in the best shape of my life after my son. I plan to get back to it! Will it take time? Yes... Will it take hard work? Yes... But telling myself this is only temporary, and once the baby is out, it is back in MY control really helps me. Because right now, I try to keep it healthy and I've still gained 20 lbs at 22 weeks. I'm certainly not in control!
  • Yes, but I was fat prior to pregnancy, so now I am fat with a baby bump.
  • I struggle with this daily! I've always been in pretty good shape and never had much of a belly so to go from that to now not being able to fit my pants was a little shocking to say the least. Prior to 16 weeks I just looked like I was getting fat, after I hit 16w it seems like my belly popped out overnight and bye bye all pants with the hair tie trick. The good thing is I think I actually look pregnant but DH said Im still in an awkward stage of ppl might be thinking I'm preggo but scared to ask lol. Regardless after switching to maternity pants I feel better about my belly and have started to embrace it.
    Expecting baby #1 August 2016 
    Already have three furbabies- Blake, Sydney, and Chester 


  • Yes, but I was fat prior to pregnancy, so now I am fat with a baby bump.
    This. I felt fat before. Now I feel fat and pregnant. 
  • I feel the same way! I'm overweight, so it all just looks like fat. Obviously everyone is different, but it seems like every pregnant woman I know or run into just looks so cute, like she's growing a little beach ball under her shirt. Me? I get pregnant all over. 
  • We are our own worst critics.  The likelihood that we are really being 'sized' up as much as we think we are is slim.  As long as your doctor thinks you're healthy and baby is growing, you shouldn't be too hard on yourself.  Our bodies are morphing, forever changing.  And that's a good thing because it means we are some of the luckiest people on the planet because we're successfully carrying beautiful little babies.


    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers

    Married: October 23, 2010

    DS: 8/7/2013

    #2 EDD: 6/29/2016, C Section: 6/22/2016



  • I find that REALLY trying to show off your bump helps. Even if it's still a little smaller. I have worn tighter tops since 16 weeks (im 17w3d now), and my coworkers say I look pregnant. Haha. Which, I like to hear because I don't want to just look fat. I have some maternity tops and pants and it really helps show it off. I am slowly loving the bump!
    Me: 32 | DH: 33
    Met: 2005 | Started Dating: 2009 | Married: 2013

    TTC#1: 06.2014;   BFP: 12.2015; DS Born: August 16, 2016
    TTC#2: 12.2017; BFP: 02.26.2018; CP 03.02.2018
                                BFP: 04.26.2018 DD Born: December 26, 2018
    Surprise Pregnancy #3; BFP: 01.11.2020; Due Date: September 19, 2021




  • My supervisor at work kept making jokes on how i look fat and not pregnant.  Being the only overweight person on our 10 person staff it was super uncomfortable. 
    I don't feel like i look pregnant at all just bloated.
    I can't wait to "pop".
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  • Agreed, that's horrid behaviour! 18 weeks now and still no 'pop' - trying the tight tops trick though x
  • Switching to maternity shirts always makes me feel more confident. I prefer the ones that are obviously maternity (ties above the bump) so it's obvious to everyone why my belly is getting so big.
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  • I feel the same. I'm 16 weeks, and it looks like I have eaten 2 chipotle burritos! BUT! I have increased my arm workouts since I have to relax on abs, and having toned arms helps especially with the warmer weather coming up! We gotta remember this is all temporary! :)


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  • I have been trying to get back in to the gym, however struggle because im
    hypermobile and so have to be careful. I don't seem to have put weight on anywhere else yet, and the scales haven't rocketed, however I'm SO hungry all the time and a few comments have made me think maybe I need to start holding back! Oops xx
  • I popped a few weeks ago (FTM 19 Wks 5 days now). I feel fat more than anything. Escprically when my grandmother told me yesterday that I am "not on the skinny side" and should go on a diet. (Yes she knows im
    pregnant. Her comments caused ALOT of crap to go down. Long time coming though) 

    Im looking forward to looking pregnant, but also not wanting to look pregnant too early.. Still have 20 weeks to go!! 
    34 Mother of 4 year old and 2 Labs. Happily Married to my Hubs of 6 years.
  • jenkar01jenkar01 member
    edited March 2016
    I'm right there with you. I feel bloated and fat not pregnant. Think, like others have said, once I pop and have the actual pregnant belly I'll feel better. Luckily I get to wear scrubs for my job so I don't feel as self conscious at work. I think we'll all feel better once we actually look pregnant :).
  • Although I am within the recommended weight gain, I have been gaining all over  (hips, butt, thighs)...at 23 weeks I still feel like I look like I have just gotten fat. I wish I was one of the lucky ladies that only gains in the belly area....I am nervous that losing the baby weight afterwards will be a struggle, as I heard it is harder for mamas to lose the baby weight if it is distributed all over, compared to just the belly..
  • I was doing pretty well, UNTIL I went to try on bathing suits for an upcoming girls trip. Fluorescent lighting in dressing rooms should be outlawed! 
  • @mgarvich I agree, Fluorescent lighting in dressing rooms should never be allowed -- pregnant or not!! 

    We just talked a lot about this in my BMB too -- I think a lot of us are going through this right now. I had a complete breakdown after taking photos for our announcement, for some reason that's when it really hit me that I just look "different", but not pregnant yet at all. I don't have any great advice since I'm kind of struggling with this myself right now, but I do feel like I'll feel much better about everything once I start to actually have a cute bump!

     I think for now I just have to try extra hard at self acceptance each day, doing things for myself that make me feel good (like finally going to get my hair highlighted, nails done, etc), and try to take the best care of myself that I can! 
  • Still kind of feel like I'm in this weird stage even though my bump is finally starting to look like a bump... I struggle most when I see pics of myself. It hit me when I saw pics of my sis and I at her wedding... I just looked so "wide". 
    What's been helping me the last couple weeks is wearing tighter shirts and sometimes a cute thin belt above my bump. My regular shirts still fit so that helps. But trying to show off my " bump" has helped me feel more preggo than chub. I also pulled out some of my more summery clothes cause its finally warm enough to wear them and it felt nice to have "new" outfits to wear too!
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