New to the board... overwhelmed...

mwendell24 · March 2016

Hello all! New to the board. I'm from the DC area. Likely PCOS (still getting some testing done to confirm) and DH has MFI as well. Had our first appointment with an RE yesterday and it's all very overwhelming... Who knew it would be so hard? Who knew it would be so expensive? The good news is we are still pretty young (I am 29 and DH is 34) so I'm hoping that ends up working in our favor. RE yesterday indicated that IVF is likely our only option because the chances for other options are too low. He gave us so much reading material... from "100 questions and answers about infertility" to all of our financial options... I assume everyone feels this overwhelmed at this stage? Anyways, sometimes we feel so alone in this, so we appreciate knowing there are others out there that know how we feel (that said, I wouldn't wish these feelings on anyone).

AandDM2014 · March 2016

Welcome @mwendell24. I am sorry that you've had to join us. I would agree with your doc that based on you having PCOS and your DH having MFI, IVF would be your best bet for conceiving. It is a bit overwhelming to begin with, but it should get easier. Just know that the ladies (and men) on this forum are awesome. Also, being young unfortunately does not guarantee success. I wish you all the best on your journey!

msirni0 · March 2016

Welcome and sorry you have to be here. I'm your neighbor, I live in the Baltimore area. Are you going through shady grove?

mwendell24 · March 2016

@msirni0 we are neighbors indeed! we are seeing Dr. Gordon at Dominion. how about you?

msirni0 · March 2016

I'm going to shady grove in bel air. Love them so far! GL with everything!

vssbrm · March 2016

Welcome and good luck! I do not share your experience with PCOS, but we share the MFI - low morph, no acrosomal caps. It is overwhelming, but the nice thing is that this process never goes as fast as you would like it to, so you should have plenty of time to read everything and digest it. Ask your doctor / nurse lots of questions, that is what you pay them all of those big bucks for! You can do it!!

kaityh1 · March 2016

Welcome! So sorry you have to be here but this group has been an amazing place to find support! IF can take a lot out of you. DH and I were very overwhelmed when we first started our journey and have since taken a short break to "regroup" before starting up again. I wish you the best of luck and hope you are not here long!

LizzieJ13 · March 2016

Welcome and good luck! I also have PCOS. It is definitely overwhelming, especially since PCOS can present in so many different ways and it feels like there is always another thing to test!

Tulips29 · March 2016

Welcome! You're definitely not alone. I also didn't realize how hard it would be and how many people are struggling with these issues until I joined this board. It's an amazing place to get support, asking questions and just generally talk to others who are in the same situation. I have PCOS and I went through clomid cycles, natural cycles and 3 IUI cycles. I went through 2 RE's before I ended up with my current 3rd one. He right away told me that with PCOS and the fact that I don't ovulate on my own, IVF would be my only option. Looking back at everything, I do wish I moved on to IVF sooner, but I'm only now in my first IVF cycle. It's still overwhelming to me, but the ladies here have been so super helpful. I hope that you find all the support you're looking for here and don't be shy to ask questions along the way. GL!

cocog26 · March 2016

Hi @mwendell24 -
I'm new too. Just wanted to extend support and positive energy your way. I never thought TTC would be so hard and it's turning into such a process (an unenjoyable one at that) - I wish so much things could be different, but in the end I always tell myself that the wait will be well worth the reward so keep your head up.

chicandbubbly · March 2016

Welcome @mwendell24! It is definitely an overwhelming process. Sorry you are dealing with this. We are dealing with MFI as well. For me, getting a "plan" at least a tentative one helped a lot. I wish you the best of luck. The ladies (and gents) on this board are wonderful and I have found a lot of support and have gained lots of knowledge so I hope you do as well!

mwendell24 · March 2016

Wow, already feeling the love and support from everyone! Thank you all so much!

@chicandbubbly I also am a planner, which on the one hand I've had to learn to let go with this, on the other hand there's a part of me that feels better having something I can do about it rather than being in the "wait and see" stage. I am not very patient but I guess I will have to learn to be!

@cocog26 we also are trying to focus on the end game... it may not be the way we imagined it happening, but hopefully now it is just a matter of how and when it happens.

@Tulips29 it is interesting to hear about your story, because I had wondered/hoped that IUI would work for us since it seems to be a simpler procedure, but am appreciative of the opportunity to make an informed decision and try what will (hopefully) work sooner in order to have our family grow that much sooner.

@LizzieJ13 I am curious to see how he diagnoses the PCOS formally. My GYN had said you couldn't see the cysts in an ultrasound, but RE seems to think otherwise. it will be nice to know and be able to make a more informed decision about what we will do going forward.

@kaityh1 we got married the same year as you guys did! I hope your break brings you the peace you are looking for.

@vssbrm both DH and I are engineers, so there is certainly no shortage of questions! do you have any advice on keeping DH's spirits up? he acts tough about his MFI ("I had a feeling" "didn't surprise me" "it is what it is" etc.), but he's pretty reserved in general, so I want to be sure I'm supporting him with his needs and feelings the same as he is for me.

@AandDM2014 thanks for including the link to your blog in your sig... it's really helpful reading more about what it might be like for us. I don't know anyone who has been through this before.

runfast · March 2016

It is overwhelming, but I've found it gets a little less so when you understand a bit more about what is happening and the process. Hopefully finding some others to talk with will be helpful in feeling less alone.

vssbrm · March 2016

@mwendell24 I can tell you what I do to keep hubby's spirits up, he can be pretty hard on himself about it. When ever it comes up I always use the words "we" or "ours". We are pretty open about it all, so when referencing either of our issues I always reference both of us, no matter if we are talking - eggs or sperm. We are in this together and I truely believe we are just extensions of each other. I reinforce this with him every chance I get. Engineers to ! My hubby is an engineer and I am in architecture. My dh's brain functions as the stereotypical engineer - very fact driven and full of questions. Which is very hard for this process because we will not always get answers...

srh18 · March 2016

Welcome to the community! Sorry that you're having to deal with this. I'm pretty new too and agree this is all pretty overwhelming, but I have found these boards really comforting and informative. I also have PCOS and I live in the Baltimore area-seems like there are a few of us that are neighbors!!

radmom27 · March 2016

Welcome! I've been going through infertility stuff since my early 20s (I'm 39 now) and it's still overwhelming at times. Just try to think of everything in small steps and small increments...sometimes the big picture is hard for me to wrap my head around especially since i'm an inpatient person. This is a great group of people who truly understand this whole process every step of the way.

Want a personalized experience?

New to the board... overwhelmed...

Re: New to the board... overwhelmed...

Choose Another Board

Search Boards