Sex Chit Chat

ShallowSeas · March 2016

I know that for the most part, sex is safe and healthy during the entire pregnancy, unless told otherwise by your doctor. I explained this to H because he was a little freaked out about the thought of sex while I'm so early in the first trimester. He finally warmed up to the idea last night (first time since we found out I was pregnant). Afterwards he admitted it was different knowing I was pregnant...and to be honest, I kind of felt the same. I'm just ready to not be so bloated and for my boobs to stop being so sensitive.

Is sex different for any of you while you're pregnant? Do your SO's have concerns/reservations about it?

whaat · March 2016

We haven't gotten to see each other as often (he's been away) but yeah. I'm really just too tired. It must be nice for him though since I used to have a much higher sex drive than he did. And I agree there was something really sexy about ttc. Now it's kind of lost its magic.

KilgraveMadeMeDoIt · March 2016

Honestly I've always had issues with sex in the first trimester setting off really horrific cramps so I just can't handle it. My care providers with prior pregnancies told me that I have an 'irritable uterus' though I now suspect it's connected to the Asherman's.

My husband is very patient and understanding and never says anything that might leave me feeling guilty or anything over it, which is much appreciated. He doesn't want to see me doubled over in pain either, obviously.

RiverSong15 · March 2016

H is a little concerned about it, and honestly, I am too. PGAL brain throws logic out the window. On top of that I'm prone to UTIs, and I'm worried about getting an infection this early.

TrulyBlessed22 · March 2016

We had sex last night and it was "different" but only because I was cramping and so not really into it. Normally I wouldn't of had any sex given how I was feeling but it was his Birthday sooo you know lol.

Anyway, to answer your question more specifically, with our 1st it was strange in the beginning...like you said it was more about just knowing there was a baby in there but then like with most things, we got used to it and for us it wasn't really too different. What did change were the positions due to comfort etc. Towards the end though, when I was pretty big, it tapered down a lot mostly due to comfort reasons. You'll see that as you get bigger and bigger the positions will be limited LOL

We were fortunate that sex wasn't a turn off for me or him while prego the first time but it can be for some and so that's something you have to work through with your SO. I hope it's the same this time around.

kristah2 · March 2016

My DH has been all about it but I've been so paranoid I refused to do it since we found out.
My Dr gave me a lot of reassurance today saying its healthy and great and I may as well go for it! She said the only time there is concern is if I'm spotting or bleeding and then it's better to hold off until seeing a dr to figure out what's going on.

NordyMN89 · March 2016

I'm so glad that DH and I aren't the only ones out there worried about having sex! We found out on Tuesday and have yet to do it. When I had my second beta yesterday I chatted with the Triage Nurse and asked her a bunch of newb questions and she reassured me sex is okay! And so is continuing my work outs, and using my seat heater in my car and ...

I'm sure it'll be different, but for so many reasons. After going through all the IF treatments and timed sex it will be nice to not have to perform on command, but who knows how I'll feel when I get bigger!

ShallowSeas · March 2016

@whaat I've feel like i've done nothing but sleep and pee for the last week and a half. Last night was the first night I didn't feel queasy so I went for it lol. Who knows when I'll feel good enough to do it again.

@KilgraveMadeMeDoIt I'm glad your H is so understanding. I put some pressure on myself to have sex since it had been so long but H reassured me last night that I don't need to feel pressured and if I wasn't into it this trimester he understood and was supportive. That was nice to hear.

@RiverSong15 I don't blame you. The UTI thought popped into my head. I'm not prone to them and have never even had one, but it would be my luck to get one in the first tri lol.

@TrulyBlessed22 Same here. I was into it but not as much as usual just because of the bloat and sore boobs $:\$

@kristah2 I was and still am paranoid about it. Everything went well last night; no cramping,spotting, or bleeding, but I can't shake the feeling of being anxious about it. I'll probably hold off again until after our u/s on 3/16. I have anxiety any way so this is really fueling the 'impending doom' part of anxiety.

hellopartyof5 · March 2016

All last pregnancy sex sucked. Ist tri I was so nauseas and 2nd tri and beyond my vag hurt like a bitch. I'm really hoping its not like that this time.

talkthewholetime · March 2016

Yeah, not worth it. I'm too crazy to enjoy it. I'll lighten up during the second tri, once I know I don't have a low lying placenta (bleeding would freak me the fuck out), but the door's probably shut on the third tri again. Everything about third tri vag is just gross.

XmomX · March 2016

Yeah we waited until the first ultrasound last time and probably will again. In the mean time I am (or will be once my cold goes away) providing some BJs I suppose so he doesn't get grumpy.

bellafirenze · March 2016

First pg I had an irritable/friable cervix (I also have pelvic prolapse so it's pretty low and easily agitated) and sex was really uncomfortable. I did it, but only for him- I got nothing from it (other than at the end trying to get labor going...)

second pg ended with a missed miscarriage at 10 weeks- I started bleeding almost immediately after sex and though I know it was not the cause, I can't shake that guilt or that flashback feeling.

This time NOTHING goes in until after the first ultrasound/first trimester. Hubs agrees. In the meantime I have ZERO drive myself, but have no problem taking care of him other ways.

comealongponds · March 2016

I'm with @RiverSong15 (I feel like I say this a lot haha) - my PGAL brain is nervous, as is DH...especially since sex caused some spotting last time. We've only had sex once, the day I got my BFP and I had some bright red blood which didn't help my nerves.

paintedtulips · March 2016

I am not having sex until the second trimester, same with last time. It just makes me too nervous! In second and third trimester my husband said he feels sex can be really awkward and uncomfortable. But, last time my libido shot way up at the end of pregnancy, so we'll see!

leilaquinn · March 2016

At this moment i feel like i could never have sex again and that would be fine. I feel sure that will change at some point. Also can anyone help me with my poor signature? Clearly i don't know what i'm doing.

NordyMN89 · March 2016

leilaquinn said:

At this moment i feel like i could never have sex again and that would be fine. I feel sure that will change at some point. Also can anyone help me with my poor signature? Clearly i don't know what i'm doing.

I spent an embarrassing amount of time trying to get mine right today! I think I used lilypie too. I used the image url and instead of inserting a link I did it like adding an image. Good luck, it was a lot of trial and error!

leilaquinn · March 2016

NordyMN89 said:

leilaquinn said:

At this moment i feel like i could never have sex again and that would be fine. I feel sure that will change at some point. Also can anyone help me with my poor signature? Clearly i don't know what i'm doing.

I spent an embarrassing amount of time trying to get mine right today! I think I used lilypie too. I used the image url and instead of inserting a link I did it like adding an image. Good luck, it was a lot of trial and error!

I am just seeing if i did what you suggested correctly...

honeybeewebb2424 · March 2016

Im a little skeptical/nervous about it because of the worry of personal guilt. I think we will probably wait until we are in the clear after the first ultrasound or possibly even first trimester.

beforeyou · March 2016

I'm with the majority of you ladies. DH and I are too nervous to do it before we have our U/S just because if I start spotting after I'll freak the eff out.

Ash9614 · March 2016

Our first time was this morning. I was definitely thinking, "OMG...please don't hit my baby." Hahaa! Nothing out of the ordinary though- all was well

carlatron · March 2016

With my son, I was way too sick during the first trimester. HG sick. Second and third tri, I still felt like crap but sex was awesome. twice per day still wouldn't have been enough. I was a machine. My poor husband. He finally cut me off at 39 weeks because he said things were all swollen and he swore he could feel the baby.

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