October 2016 Moms

New posts

Here goes. While I appreciate the reason behind the referrals to the symptoms thread and direction to search and find an existing thread, I think it's ruining our board. 

First, new people don't know about the symptoms thread. I've never seen one thread dedicated to all symptoms and no others allowed. I've been on the Bump for over 5 years. There are very few new threads, because symptoms are what people talk about at this stage in the game. I don't think it makes things more organized, I think it makes things boring.

Next, what if someone has a legitimate symptom worry that could be dangerous to her or her baby's life? If it gets buried in the symptoms thread, it could be really bad.

Finally, you don't get to decide what other people post. Like I said, I get the idea. No one likes 15 posts in a row about morning sickness. But posting about symptoms isn't against the TOU, so you don't really get to dictate that.

I realize this is likely an UO and no one will sit with me at lunch anymore, but I feel like it ha to be said.

Lilypie Maternity tickers

Re: New posts

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  • br0co1ii said:
    If someone has a life-threatening situation, they probably should seek medical advice, not ask the internet.
    Andplusalso... as much as we can't dictate how others post, neither can you. 
    And... if everyone posts a new discussion about something that's already been discussed on multiple threads, it will be very difficult to find because the board will be too cluttered. Which is ultimately the reason new people can't find threads in the first place.
    This.

    Also, if everyone starts a new thread for their symptoms, threads are so likely to get lost in the clutter. 

    Personally, I love the idea a consolidated weekly symptoms thread and the weekly randoms. Sure, a new thread here and there is fine, but I think people try to point new users to the weekly threads so they can participate in conversation.

    And ditto to the bolded, if it is a life threatening situation, your first thought should not be to post on a public forum.
    DH: 29 | Me: 29 
    Dating: 10/3/08 | Married: 12/27/14
    TTC #1: August 2015 | BFP: 2/3/16 | EDD: 10/7/16
    DD: 10/5/16
    TTC #2: September 2017 | BFP: 4/28/18 | EDD: 1/7/19
    DS: 1/9/19
    BabyFruit Ticker


  • nlane0723nlane0723 member
    edited March 2016
    .

    Me: 28  DH: 27
    TTC since 2011
    IVF #1 June 2013 DD born: 2/25/14
    IVF #2 January 2016 Double Transfer: 1/28/2016
    First Beta: 108 Second Beta: 360.3
    Twins EDD: 10/13/2016
  • Of course a life threatening situation shouldn't be posted on a message board instead of a doctor. That doesn't stop people from doing it.

    Ok, I get the point. People like the set up the way it is. I wanted to give my opinion on something that has been bugging me for a couple weeks, and I did. That's how a community works. 

    Lilypie Maternity tickers

  • nlane0723nlane0723 member
    edited March 2016
    I give up. Haha.

    Me: 28  DH: 27
    TTC since 2011
    IVF #1 June 2013 DD born: 2/25/14
    IVF #2 January 2016 Double Transfer: 1/28/2016
    First Beta: 108 Second Beta: 360.3
    Twins EDD: 10/13/2016
  • This would have been a good FFFC. 

    The PSA at the top, if people took time to read it, states that there's a symptoms thread and encourages people to use the search function (that way you don't have to search through 10 pages of posts). 

    Its frustrating because people aren't reading those pinned posts and aren't really interested in becoming members of our community. They ask a SS question, rarely come back and rarely contribute to others' posts. They're using us. Not cool. 

    LFAF April Siggy: TV/Movie BFFs








    BFP #1 12/2012, DS born 8/2013
    BFP #2 7/2015, MMC and D&C 9/2015
    BFP #3 11/2015, CP
    BFP #4 1/2016, DD born 10/2016




  • I could not agree more with this post! 
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  • I agree somewhat. I don't think multiple posts clutter the board; I think it keeps things interesting. I also feel like people are less likely to respond when you post on a thread that's been out there for a while. From what I've observed, if you post on the symptoms thread, you may get one or two responses. If you post an individual thread, you'll get ten or more. If we want to discourage individual posts, we should probably work on that.

    Anyway- I see both sides of it. I think if everyone used common sense and played my the rules, there could be a good balance of SS posts and regular posts, but that's never going to happen, so I guess I support the system, as it is. 


    Pregnancy Ticker
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I agree somewhat. I don't think multiple posts clutter the board; I think it keeps things interesting. I also feel like people are less likely to respond when you post on a thread that's been out there for a while. From what I've observed, if you post on the symptoms thread, you may get one or two responses. If you post an individual thread, you'll get ten or more. If we want to discourage individual posts, we should probably work on that.

    Anyway- I see both sides of it. I think if everyone used common sense and played my the rules, there could be a good balance of SS posts and regular posts, but that's never going to happen, so I guess I support the system, as it is. 


    THIS! It's just about common sense people. There is a happy balance, I'm sure of it :-)
  • I'm a special snowflake who gets a bit queasy after lunch, anyone else? I'm turning 8 weeks and HUGE, obviously I can't just have bloat. OMG has anyone else tried to poop lately?

    NO, those go in their dedicated threads. It's how we organize things and keep threads from getting buried. Check out any other board that is farther along, the system is here because it works. I'm sure you'll love it when everyone makes a personal thread about their 13 weeks scan and the u/s pics (and the numerous debates about why some of us skip it) and the 150 "it's a girl/boy" threads pop up because you think they shouldn't have a dedicated place.

    If someone has a legit concern, call your doctor or urgent care center. If you have something new to talk about post it, but if its obviously been gone over a hundred times then post where it goes. If someone redirects to something kindly "hey, over in symptoms there are a lot of people who have XYZ too, maybe they can help. Here is the link" isn't killing anyone.
    BFP: July 2013 M/C August 5, 2013
    BFP: October 22, 2013 EDD: June 21, 2014
    Baby boy arrived June 23, 2014

    BFP: February 2016 EDD: October 17, 2016
  • alysie89 said:
    The last time I was on the bump it was all snark, and there's a part of me that really enjoyed the snark, but I also was more of a lurker because I didn't want to be a recipient  of it.
    Yes! I was mostly a lurker on the TTGP board because the snark there is out of this world. Which is quite entertaining, until it happens to you lol. 
    Pregnancy Ticker
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I 100% understand the sentiment of this post. I am very new to the board and have at times felt a little bad for the new posters who are immediately reprimanded and told to post in the correct spot. But then I stop feeling bad when they continue to do it over and over and start to wonder what it is that they aren't understanding. I'll admit that i haven't read the pinned threads in their entirety, but i've lurked enough and seen enough mistakes made to know how things work. And it didn't take me months to figure that out either.

    Hopefully as everyone progresses the new threads will get more interesting and diverse.
    Me: 30  DH: 31
    Married 2010
    TTC since Nov. 2015
    BFP#1: 2/8/16
    MC: 3/19/16  :'(
    BFP#2: 9/3/16   EDD: 5/17/17

    mommy to the cutest rescue mutt ever.
    my chart
  • I see both sides of this coin and I appreciate both sides as well.  There always needs to be a balance.

    I think @Wishilivedinflorida said my main issue with all the new threads, and it's this.. not even regarding symptoms..this is a community, and I'm going to ignore those in the community that just take, take, take.. and post, post, post.. not contributing to other threads and posts.. I hate threads that come out of nowhere for a person, and you've never seen them post before and you never see them post again.  

    No one has to take responsibility in answering all those threads that are repetitive.  I just ignore them.  Don't waste the effort/time/aggravation.

    This post could totally be a part of UO and FFFC.
  • Interesting to who? The people who wind up answering the same question over and over and over again? Or the clueless newbies who don't care to take any time to look for their answer but demand support immediately without giving any first??

    It's a two way street.

    Having organization isn't the worst thing in the world.
    I just meant that I find it preferable to having nothing going on, at all. When it's boring around here, like on the weekends, I don't mind the SS posts because it curbs the boredom. 

    I don't think organization is the worst thing in the world. In the end, I said I supported the system as it stands. 
    Pregnancy Ticker
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • But how do you search for such posts as the symptoms post when you are mobile?  There's so many times I would like to join in on conversations but I'm on the mobile app 99% of the time so I only mainly see the posts on the main screen because I really don't want to have to page through all the pages of posts to find one certain one.  


    BabyFruit Ticker


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • @br0co1ii I completely understand those reasons. I just think it's going overboard when someone can't post about a symptom that's nowhere on the front page without being directed to post somewhere else. If I'm having a symptom I'm curious about, I'm not going to sift through 10 pages of thread to find what I'm looking for. 

    And you're absolutely right. I don't get to dictate what other people post. That's why I made a suggestion about how to make our board more dynamic. There's no demand there.
    The search tool is your friend :) You can search directly on Oct '16 or you can see when anyone at any time in the past experienced your super speshul, totes yoonique symptom
    You've never seen me post about symptoms, so I'm not sure what this is implying. This is my 5th pregnancy, 4th baby, so I know how things work. I've got no desire to be an attention seeking SS. 

    My point was about the over-regulation of what can be posted in a new thread. Who's on the committee that decides what can be posted? 

    Lilypie Maternity tickers

  • SuperKristy85SuperKristy85 member
    edited March 2016
    @sparklegrump I don't think she was implying that you had a SS symptom post but your post did mention about searching through pages of threads to get to the symptom board. You don't have to do that because of the search feature. 

    Also, I see the point in that you don't get a lot of individual responses on the symptom thread but there probably are discussions around that same symptom, even if its not directed to an individual. Additionally I think this goes to the point that if no one here knows you and you haven't made an effort to get to know others, we may be less inclined to answer your individual question. This just encourages participation and building relationships with everyone in the group. 

    Its great the concern was voiced and that we can discuss how we all like the board to run. I think the general consensus here is that the majority like the organization involved in the threads and want to stick with posting on  the symptoms thread. 
    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • @CopperBoom86 It's true that new threads may get more replies than posts to the symptoms thread... but a lot of those replies are redirections to the appropriate thread.


  • I can see the point you are making, OP, but it just doesn't work. I tend to not go back and re-check the symptoms thread unless I am tagged in it (I just forget after the first day or so), so yeah people would get more responses by making their own threads. However, the same question would be asked every single day and that would get really annoying. Having everything in one place is much more convenient.
    BabyGaga
  • @shrubbymango whether it's right or wrong, I think there are a lot of reasons that might be happening and I won't dare to explain my hypotheses haha. I don't think that should discourage anyone from participating or to get lost....it's not foolproof but after seeing which threads tend to lend themselves to more snark or disagreement, everyone can choose which ones to participate more or less in. That's how I'm trying to look at this anyway. I hope you stick around!
  • I have mixed feelings about this. I am sometimes unsure of whether to post in a weekly thread or start a new thread, and I don't think the guidelines are super clear about this. Generally I feel like if someone starts a thread that you don't want to read or post in, you don't have to read or post in it. If people are using the board as their own google and are just trying to get info, then those who want to engage with that question will reply and those that don't won't. My personal concern about posting in weekly threads is that sometimes not as many people read them, and/or posts get buried, so I don't always get my questions answered.

    I'm appreciative of the moderators and others that take time to help this board thrive.
  • I was a bit put off when I read through the guidelines because it seemed a little rigid. I haven't ever had issue with finding posts in groups that weren't moderated like this. I definitely agree that the same questions over and over are incredibly annoying. I think I explained false labor hundreds of times the last time I was on this. I have a feeling the only time I'm going to check the smyptoms thread is if I'm wanting to post. I would just assume it's constipation/fatigue/normal preggo stuff. honestly, how many other seasoned mommy's will bother to look through it? what about those experiencing abnormal stuff and are looking for encouragement/support? Will they get the response they need? what about the new preggos that could use the btdt knowledge?what is the solution to that? further divide the symptoms thread? everyone make a solid attempt to read and respond to posts? that is really the only thing that concerns me about this system. I'm.definitely enjoying the daily threads and think that it's a fun/great way to get to know everyone in this birth club :) thanks to the moderators!

    O16 April Siggy
  • If y'all think this is a snarky board/thread, you should review the BMB's from 2014 before TB started their "no snark" policy.  Also, for FTM's, wait 6 months and see how you feel about lurkers then.

    Me: 28  DH: 27
    TTC since 2011
    IVF #1 June 2013 DD born: 2/25/14
    IVF #2 January 2016 Double Transfer: 1/28/2016
    First Beta: 108 Second Beta: 360.3
    Twins EDD: 10/13/2016
  • Just blame it on hormones.
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