Omg, mil giving me grief about 'nipple toughening' lol

michellabanana · March 2016

So I was talking about BF class, and she's going on and on about how to toughen your nipples and I'm all like "what?!"

Well the lactation consultant said it was an old myth that really doesn't work, and can actually cause the baby stress.

But she 'had breastfeed 3 babies, with no soreness, so what does she know'. She's so passive aggressive lol.

I just dont want to hurt my nipples

I was just surprised I never heard that before

gampster · March 2016

My stepmom tells me every chance she gets to apply lanolin three weeks before the birth to help with soreness.

ayeshaohara · March 2016

I've heard it does more damage than good. Our boobs know what to do, just let them do it! Sure they might get sore or cracked or whatever but it's part of the process. I've had people recommend the same thing about trying to toughen them up...don't do it!!

2.red.heads · March 2016

I don't know much about it, but I remember my mom bringing that up too when I was pregnant with my first. I successfully bf'd two babies, but damn, my nipples did not seem very 'tough' that first month both times.

lalala2004 · March 2016

I've heard there is no point to "toughening them up" but it's a good idea to start using a nipple cream to moisturize a bit.

araecasey · March 2016

Gotta love grandma haha. They always have the "perfect" advice

I actually thought the idea of toughening up your nipples was total garbage, until my toddler (who I'm still nursing) decided she really only wants my right boob. Now anytime she latches on the left, it takes me right back to newborn nursing. Maybe there's something to it?? Who knows. You'll be just fine without putting your nips through the wringer before babe even gets here.

MrsKubley · March 2016

Omg my mil told me to have my husband (her son!!) toughen them up for me. Ewww just no.

TheThornBird · March 2016

Wait.....so how do you toughen up nipples?? I'm envisioning something with binder clips and sandpaper......*shudder*

MrsKubley · March 2016

TheThornBird said:

Wait.....so how do you toughen up nipples?? I'm envisioning something with binder clips and sandpaper......*shudder*

Mil said to let husband "be rough with them" um no?

JennyS86 · March 2016

a nail file?? agreed *shudder*

mcb2016 · March 2016

I haven't heard of this either.

lalala2004 · March 2016

I read about running them with a washcloth and walking around braless so they run against your shirt. Pretty sure it's unnecessary, though. I mean, your nipples are going to go through a lot, you can't exactly prepare them.

JRTWM · March 2016

My MIL said the same thing with my 1st. She said take a wash cloth and rub it.....never did and survived just fine!

doozer1345 · March 2016

I've heard it but was told it never worked and you couldn't convince me to do it even if it did. BFing is going to hurt initially. However, IME, it's a pain that doesn't bother you. I don't know if you've ever experienced anything like that. I didn't until BFing.. My nipples were cracked and rough for a couple weeks in the beginning and no it didn't feel great BUT it didn't bother me enough to stop BFing. Just get some Lanisoh and/or those icy/warm pads to soothe your nipples and you'll be fine

camillaandcarson · March 2016

Your LC told you the truth, LLL would too. I have nursed for years so far (and will add more when this baby comes) please do not do that to yourself.
Not only is what she saying not true it is really inappropriate. MIL never ever needs to be talking about your nipples with anyone. Not you, not her son. Not her husband.
https://community.babycenter.com/groups/a4725/dwil_nation

avidkeo · March 2016

What about perineal stretching? Lol. Thats another random one I heard before having DD.

JoMunson · March 2016

avidkeo said:

What about perineal stretching? Lol. Thats another random one I heard before having DD.

My midwife said she would tell me how to do it when I got to 37 weeks. I told DH about it- he's excited to try it! Maybe I should tell him about nipple toughening to get a little more action

KelleAlward · March 2016

I did some of the "nipple toughening" with my first and had very little soreness with breastfeeding. I will def do it again. Just little things like no bra, or dry rubbing them for a few minutes before going to sleep at night. I think it helped a lot, and def didn't hurt anything.

AdorkablePixie · March 2016

My mom also tells me I should toughen my nipples using the washcloth method. I've read it doesn't really help though, so I don't know that I see the point. I may do it, I may not. Who knows.

@avidkeo As far ad the perineal stretching, that's something I definitely plan on doing. It's supposed to help stretch things out and make you less likely to tear during birth. Definitely worth a shot if you ask me. There is actually a post about this on the 3rd tri board. https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12664692/alright-who-here-is-doing-perineal-massage-and-when-did-you-start-how-often-and-how-long#latest It might help with any questions you have.

kbrands7 · March 2016

Lol. Toughening is definitely not necessary; it will happen naturally. It doesn't always cause cracking or bleeding either.The only time I ever bled during bf was when DS got his top and bottom teeth in at the same time around 6 mo and nipped me. No biggie; it was pretty much healed by later that evening and didn't happen again. In terms of bad advice, I remember during my last pregnancy being told by someone at the grocery store to take a pumice stone to them. Really, people have no sense of boundaries when it comes to giving pregnant women or parents advice!

Bluejay3030 · March 2016

kbrands7 said:

Lol. Toughening is definitely not necessary; it will happen naturally. It doesn't always cause cracking or bleeding either.The only time I ever bled during bf was when DS got his top and bottom teeth in at the same time around 6 mo and nipped me. No biggie; it was pretty much healed by later that evening and didn't happen again. In terms of bad advice, I remember during my last pregnancy being told by someone at the grocery store to take a pumice stone to them. Really, people have no sense of boundaries when it comes to giving pregnant women or parents advice!

swflJD · March 2016

I'm relatively close with my MIL, but I couldn't imagine having a conversation like that with her. How awkward! The only thing my MIL has asked was whether I intend to bf. It's really none of her business or anyone else's, and I have zero patience for intrusive personal questions lately, so I just said, "Don't worry, I'll feed my kid." I think she got the hint because she hasn't brought it up again.

michellabanana · March 2016

Well in all honesty, I was the one that brought up the BF class. I was just shocked about when she brought up the toughening lol...I never heard of it! (No wonder my mother didn't breastfeed!). I jokingly told her I would have to pick up some Brillo pads! She even admitted her knowledge was decades old.

I was trying to keep my MIL in the loop as possible, she only had sons, and her youngest is my husband who is 47. She thought he would never get married, let alone have kids. She's just so excited.

dsmith211 · March 2016

Just reading some of these makes me hurt... LOL. I think I'll pass.

ayeshaohara · March 2016

JoMunson said:

avidkeo said:

What about perineal stretching? Lol. Thats another random one I heard before having DD.

My midwife said she would tell me how to do it when I got to 37 weeks. I told DH about it- he's excited to try it! Maybe I should tell him about nipple toughening to get a little more action

My husband told me he doesn't want to help with this at all...I think he finds the idea very unromantic. So I might be doing it on my own!!!

RMLandy · March 2016

I feel like perineum massage is in the same realm as nipple toughening and I won't be doing either. Didn't with my first and everything turned out fine with delivery and breastfeeding. Pregnancy is uncomfortable enough. I have no desire to add more discomfort!!

flemmon · March 2016

My OB told me that attempting to "toughen your nipples" before the baby comes can induce labor.

NB817 · March 2016

Oh my word. Please leave your nipples alone. Lol. BFing will hurt a little the first few days. The hospital will give you wonderful stuff to rub on them to help with it though. And the more often you put baby to breast the faster the pain goes away because that's the true toughening of your nipples. Lol. No matter how "roughly" your DH plays with them nothing compares to baby's latch.

CrystalBolte · March 2016

My mom keeps telling me to toughen up my nipples to BF. I looked at her and told her they've been pierced, and had nipple clamps on them before, and asked if there's anything else she would suggest. She had nothin'...

dcheard · March 2016

Oh my gosh!! My mil told me the exact same thing too!! She was like demonstrating what I should do while out shopping!!! It was soooo embarrassing! I was just like yeah sure thing and haven't done anything bout it!! Hahaha

pelicanesque · March 2016

JoMunson said:

avidkeo said:

What about perineal stretching? Lol. Thats another random one I heard before having DD.

My midwife said she would tell me how to do it when I got to 37 weeks. I told DH about it- he's excited to try it! Maybe I should tell him about nipple toughening to get a little more action

We started doing the perineal massage at 30 weeks (but not every day). DH was waaay more excited about than I thought he would be, ha!

Also, reading a book about BF right now ("So That's What They're For"), and it mentions that if you really want to prep your nipples, you can walk around without a bra to let your nipples rub against your shirt, but you don't really want to do anything more than that because of how sensitive our skin is there.

pelicanesque · March 2016

RMLandy said:

I feel like perineum massage is in the same realm as nipple toughening and I won't be doing either. Didn't with my first and everything turned out fine with delivery and breastfeeding. Pregnancy is uncomfortable enough. I have no desire to add more discomfort!!

They are not in the same realm. I've had several friends swear by perineal massage and kept them from tearing, and it is actually recommended by doctors, but hey, YMMV and if you didn't need it, you didn't need it.
Toughening nipples is an old wives thing and doctors/midwives do NOT recommend it. It's a generational thing because my mom also was told to do it in the 80's.

michellabanana · March 2016

I might have added a few steps for the perineal massage for my hubby lol

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Omg, mil giving me grief about 'nipple toughening' lol

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