Still in shock

SnobunnieMel · February 2016

i guess it's time to move on over here from October 2016. My husband and I got our BFP Jan 22 after 3 months of trying. Both beta draws and progesterone were great. Went in at 5w6d for a placement confirmation, had a yolk sac in place. The next week had a strong heartbeat of 113. Went back in today at 8w6d for my first full OB appointment. I have had no change in my strong pregnancy symptoms and no warnings, but ultrasound revealed no further heartbeat. Baby only measured 8w2d so they think it stopped growing only 3 days ago or so. I am scheduled for a d&c tomorrow. I know there will be no answers but we are really struggling right now. Especially since there was no warning and the baby had grown so much. This has been the hardest day of my life so far.

iceandsnowflakes29 · February 2016

@SnobunnieMel another former Oct 16 member here. I'm so sorry for your loss. I have a Blighted Ovum. I'm 7 weeks 3 days and am waiting to miscarry naturally. You probably don't remember me. I participated very sparingly in the beginning on the Oct board because I couldn't shake a "bad feeling". I'm so sorry for your loss

roxgibbons · February 2016

@SnobunnieMel I am so sorry for your loss and the pain you are going through. I was right in your situation just two weeks ago and shock is exactly what we felt too as we had gone through two early ultrasounds and blood draws and all was good. I know you are hurting right now,so please just know that this board has been very helpful in dealing with the grief process. Please reach out with any questions you may have. Sending you thoughts for comfort and peace during this difficult time. Hugs to you.

ladipale · February 2016

I'm so sorry. I'm just moving over from Aug 2016 board - I saw HB 3 times and it was gone by my 13 week appt. I also have D&C tomorrow. Totally in shock.

musicinmysoul17 · February 2016

I am so sorry for your loss. I was also on October 2016 but I miscarried at 5 weeks. Every day is hard in it's own way. Just rest, take care of yourself, and allow yourself time.

BrightenMySky · February 2016

I am so sorry. It really really sucks. I also had no warnings--no spotting, no change in pregnancy symptoms, etc.--and my betas were great (plus good hb at 7w5d). Do whatever you need to do to take care of yourself right now--crying, staying in bed, taking a bath, cuddling with your furkids (who sound awesome from your siggy).

Are you planning to have the remains tested after your d&c? I did--my OB said it was not standard for a first m/c, but if I was going to do the surgery, I wanted to get as much info as possible--and we found out that we had basically a catastrophic (always fatal) chromosomal abnormality. While not everyone will get an answer from the testing, we did, and knowing the cause of death helped me a bit. Although my OB just came out and told me my baby's sex, which I was not prepared for, and that made it feel even more real (somehow).

SnobunnieMel · February 2016

@BrightenMySky we are planning on having it tested and my husband has been so supportive of reminding me how if it was somethings terribly wrong this was best for all 3 of us. It hurts my heart that so many of us are in this position but just reading other people's stories I know will help as will the support. Thank you so much.

@iceandsnowflakes29 I do remember you and was so sorry when you had to leave. I hope you are doing ok in your journey

madamerwin · February 2016

I'm so sorry for your loss @SnobunnieMel... I had not joined the Oct 2016 board yet, but that is when I was due as well. I miscarried on 2/17 after seeing the heartbeat the day before. I definitely understand the shock.

Almost two weeks after my miscarriage, the shock has dulled, but it has been replaced by sadness. Some days are easier than others, but I know that with time, it will get easier - even if it never goes away completely.

We are waiting on the genetic testing results (I miscarried at home, but I was able to take the "product of conception", as they so sterilely call it, to the doc the next morning). I am hoping that the results will show that it was not viable to begin with - if offers me a glimmer of hope that next time everything will work out.

Sending you hugs.

yolandamunoz · March 2016

@madamerwin I also find this technical terms really harsh and not nice at all to read or hear about.

dear ladies I am sorry for your losses. I hope your D&C s go well. Do come back and tell us how are you doing.

hugs
-y

iceandsnowflakes29 · March 2016

@SnobunnieMel thinking of you! ((Hugs))

smazzaca · March 2016

I'm so sorry for your loss. I too am going through the same situation and can tell you that talking about to others that have gone through it and getting much needed hugs has somewhat helped. @SnobunnieMel

SnobunnieMel · March 2016

Thanks everyone. Just got the call from my dr that my d&c will be early tomorrow morning after being in limbo that it could be anytime as late as Friday. It hit me hard that our little teddy graham really will be gone after that. Hoping that eventually I may feel like something of my normal self again. Seems impossible right now.

BrightenMySky · March 2016

@SnobunnieMel I am so sorry and thinking of you. Sending you so many hugs. There are so many little moments that make it feel so painfully real, like for me, especially when the nurse put in my IV pre-surgery, it really hit me hard.

Stairbear · March 2016

@SnobunnieMel How awful. Absolutely brutal. I'm so sorry to hear this. I know this must feel like a bad dream now, but please know you are not alone in your grief and shock. I am also a former October 16 member (I was lurking, hadn't introduced myself yet), and I know it's tough to suddenly find yourself here instead of on that happy board. I'm glad that the d&c isn't something you have to wait too long for. I'm very very sorry this has happened.

AverageAsh · March 2016

I'm thinking of you today. I hope you are surrounded by comfort and support.

Spartanrd4 · March 2016

@SnobunnieMel I was also in the October 16 group, I think our due dates were pretty close to each other. Its nice to know that we are not alone in this and that hopefully we will have a happy outcome in the future. This is one of the hardest things I've had to go through but I'm just trying to be positive. This is not our fault. I'm here for you!

roxgibbons · March 2016

@SnobunnieMel- thinking of you. I hope your procedure goes smoothly and sending you positive thoughts for strength and comfort during this difficult time.

HLD3194 · March 2016

@SnobunnieMel- thinking of you and your family. I recently had a loss. Saw HB 3x and 4th apt nothing...we were absolutely shocked and devastated. I had a D&C 1 week ago and am eager to start trying again. People keep telling me it gets better but I honestly can't believe them. Sorry for your loss and sending you lots of hugs

Me: 30 DH: 32
Married: 11.12.11
BFP: 12/08/14 EDD 8/6/15

BFP: 1/1/16 EDD 9/15/16
Confirmed MC: 2/23/16 D&C 2/25/16

Still in shock

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