Great Big Thank You!

DinosaurJumper · February 2016

Got my hopes up too high on the day of my expected period, and when AF came I felt blindsided. I'm better now. Looking at the positive side and all that, but that day I just wanted to talk to someone, besides just DH, about how I felt. I texted two of my only friends, both live long distance, and tried to bring up the issue. Just was looking for consolment I think. Well, both were awkward, as expected, but each conversation quickly wound back to an issue they were having. (I have a knack for liking to help people, but in doing so no one thinks I need help) Before, this would have made me depressed, but now I'm fine with it. And I think it's because of this wonderful community

so what if none of my fleshy friends or family truly know how I feel or what I am going through! I have a great group of ladies online that are all experiencing the same thing in a different way. You ladies have all been so supporting and caring, and it feels great to be a part of this group. I just wanted to thank you all

zrain · February 2016

I second this!!! I have a couple coworkers who have been through TTC and loss, but I don't see them very often and they're not TTC right now so it feels one sided, and my non-work friends don't get it. It's so wonderful that we have each other here to commiserate and support each other

edited because use I can't type

CoonMom · February 2016

Well said. I am so grateful for this community. I don't post as often as I'd like but lurk daily/hourly. I'm so glad I have fiends (even if they are Internet strangers) who get me and what I'm going through.

cooaladoll · February 2016

So sweet @DinosaurJumper and I totally want to second that sentiment! I do have girlfriends that I've told, but it's very hard for them or DF to console me or understand my rush to get back to that pregnant state because they haven't been there or felt those emotions. They can sympathize, but it's only in the, "well that does happen and I am sorry for you" way, but they still can't feel the emotion.

The only friend I have who did have an MC just had her second child and is so wrapped up in the darling that I can't tell her yet. Similar for my very best friend who, strangely enough, I don't talk to very often. I want to tell her, in fact I plan to call her today, but she's pregnant now with her third (first two are twins) but I feel I could somehow jinx her pregnancy with the bad news. I know that's silly, but I feel like it's best to wait until she's had a happy healthy darling before I break the bad news to her, and hopefully I'll be KU'd again before I do.

So again, yes yes yes, you women are so amazing and comforting to be able to turn to in this painful phase of life and thank you all!

BornReady · February 2016

Could not agree more! I would be lost without all of you to vent to and mutually support through this process! I live in a small coastal community and we lost one of our young people a couple years ago. He was 22 and his parents at his funeral thanked everyone and said "It takes a village to raise a child, but nobody ever tells you it also takes a village to bury one". I think of that all the time in this process, not comparing the losses, but it truly does take a community of people in real life and/or online to cope with this grief.

fivetimesnoluck · February 2016

Yes! Grateful for this forum and all of you stranger friends. I have dear and caring friends in real life, but there are limits to how much they can relate... As we approach another effort at TTC, it is comforting to know I'm not alone.

And I must add I love your screen name, @dogmomwantinghuman!

roper2617 · February 2016

Beautifully said @DinosaurJumper

I was just telling one of my close friends about all the love and support from this community. My flesh people try but sometimes they just don't know what to say/do. It's such a good feeling to know that we are not alone in this

ps: I've changed my screen name from babyroper16 to this one. This new one is much more practical for me.

chloe97 · February 2016

Completely agree @DinosaurJumper. I've learned so much from you ladies and thank you all for responding me when I'm trying to figure out what's going on with my body! The physical and emotional healing process has take longer than I ever imagined. I'm so glad I have you ladies to go through this process with!!

catiecatp · February 2016

I love you gals!

I hope that when I get a BFP several of y'all do too - a) because I want all y'all to have the same success in TTC but b) because I don't want to go to the PGAL without people who've struggled along with me...

MamaCoffin · February 2016

You guys have quite literally saved my sanity. I'm a full time stay at home mom (I do seamstress work from home too) and the DH works from home. Dealing with loss and ttc is stressful enough... But I don't really have an outlet outside of these walls and I'm ALWAYS around hubby. Being able to just speak to other women freely and see that other people are dealing with ish too changes so much perspective.

silentP · February 2016

Thankful for this group! I always say that I hate for anyone else to have to go through this, but I am so grateful to have you all. There is something that you understand that not many in my life do. I love that I might feel crazy but then I come here and can breathe a sigh of relief that I am not all that crazy, after all.

Wishing you all the best and excited for what's to come!

mylittleversailles · February 2016

Yeah, totally. I feel like everyone else is kind of bored (not in a malicious way, rather just like @DinosaurJumper they're ready for me to help them again) with my experience with losing our baby. We went pubic with everything and people were wonderful and surprising, but that's over now. It's scary and it's been wonderful to be able to come here and talk about it freely. Absolutely tremendous people here.

chloe97 · February 2016

@reneeannemm I totally understand what you mean about people assuming you are passed your grief. I actually think I've felt worse the last month than I did the month after my MC. What's funny is that people have stopped being sensitive about it. They are chatting away about pregnant people due to same week as me, stopped checking in on me, etc. People who haven't been through it don't get it, but I think TTC after loss in some ways is more traumatic than the actual MC. The day after my MC, I felt pretty good about my chances having a live healthy baby, but since my body has started readjusting, I feel less and less good about my chances as my body does more and more weird, confusing things.

BornReady · February 2016

@chloe97 I completely agree with your sentiment that you felt better soon after your miscarriage. I thought I'd be pregnant and recovered soon after my MC. As the months tick by I'm feeling less and less optimistic as things slowly feel adjust.

cjs260 · February 2016

I'd be lost without this community. Like everyone has said, it's so awesome to be a part of a community where everyone understands what you're going through. Only a few people I know have had losses, but they are all in a different state from me, and where I am in my schooling/career, it's pretty uncommon to be TTC anyway. So all of you guys have kept me sane, calmed my fears, and let me know everything is going to be okay! Hugs to you all!

BooksForMe23 · February 2016

Yes, yes, yes! To all of it! Also @roper2617 I'm now going to refer to family and friends as "flesh people."

queenklau · March 2016

I love this thread! Thanks @DinosaurJumper for getting this started. You all are an amazing group of women, love you all! This forum has helped me tremendously. I agree let's all move to the PGAL group together

Great Big Thank You!

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