Nursing and pumping around visitors

srecupido · February 2016

Hi ladies! I'm 11 days pp and attempting to eventually ebf. We had some initial trouble with weight loss/ low production so we are supplementing right now. I'm attempting to nurse as much as possible to get LO comfortable with latching then pumping after- trying to do this at each day feed (at night I just pump). I'm struggling to balance feeding on demanding and getting us both better with bfing with the daily visitors. We limit visitors to two 'rounds' a day but predicting when LO wants to feed is impossible. I don't want to take him away from visitors especially when our nursing sessions can go for an hour so we'll skip and I'll give him a bottle right away.

Has anyone been in a similar situation and felt accommodating visitors hindered your success at bfing?

bellie1223 · February 2016

Honestly if you are set on ebf (for the record, we supplement with some formula and I have no problem with formula and/or bottle feeding) i think you either need to limit visitors, or get comfortable with breast feeding in front of people. Friends and family have the rest of their lives to get to know your lo; but you have a limited amount of time to establish breastfeeding.

I know newborns are cute and squishy, but seriously all they do is eat, cry and sleep, I'll never understand what the rush is for people to come over and invade a new mom's space. Babies are way more fun when they are a bit older, smiling, and you can play with them.

failuretofly · February 2016

I agree with PP, and also wanted to add you should really be putting baby to breast at night as well as they will stimulate your supply much better than a pump and my midwife told me our prolactin levels are highest between 1-6am so this is prime time.

marijaa333 · February 2016

Yes, nurse, nurse, nurse! The visitors will adapt, and so will you.

For a while there when he still took a long time to nurse, I would just sit with my son latched on while having tea with whomever was visiting.

I've gotten a lot of use out of one of these Bebe au Lait nursing covers: https://www.amazon.com/Bebe-Lait-Premium-Cotton-Nursing/dp/B00GXDFPNU/ref=sr_1_3_a_it

They provide great coverage and you can still see the baby, and they work especially well indoors and when you have a good sitting surface (like a couch in your living room); they also work on a windy day on a park bench, but then you have to hold down the sides a bit.

kdoak2015 · February 2016

I agree with PP if you want to ebf your baby needs to be on your breasts all the time for the next few days. My LC told me to go on a nursing vacation and just have my DD on my breasts all day. We still aren't able to ebf at 13 weeks but I'm ok with that because we get the best of both worlds.

wintersong · February 2016

Seriously, my H and I had a rule: no visitors except for grandparents in the first few weeks. Just tell people they can come visit later.

srecupido · February 2016

Thanks for all the feedback ladies. I did get a nursing cover but it never crossed my mind to use it at home

I do want to ebf but have been struggling to stay committed with the difficulties. I know I should stick it out for at least a few weeks to give it a fair chance. It's mainly my husbands family that wants to visit for hours so i will try to impress the importance on him as well.

wintersong · February 2016

srecupido said:

Thanks for all the feedback ladies. I did get a nursing cover but it never crossed my mind to use it at home I do want to ebf but have been struggling to stay committed with the difficulties. I know I should stick it out for at least a few weeks to give it a fair chance. It's mainly my husbands family that wants to visit for hours so i will try to impress the importance on him as well.

Or seriously just excuse yourself to feed the baby. Even for a long feed. If they are offended they are being ridiculous.

srecupido · February 2016

@longliveregina I can't say I disagree but with an old school stereotypical Italian family if we don't follow my father in laws wishes it causes more arguments so I try to pick and choose my battles

wintersong · February 2016

srecupido said:

@longliveregina I can't say I disagree but with an old school stereotypical Italian family if we don't follow my father in laws wishes it causes more arguments so I try to pick and choose my battles

Like, he would say no you can't go feed Your baby?

I wouldn't even ask, just do it. And ask you dh to run interference.

Eta you are the baby's parents. You decide what is best. Is this the first grandchild?

ETalsoA Breastfeeding is definitely a battle with picking.

krissyberb · February 2016

We had a tough time in the early days with pumping and nursing. My rules were 1) no visitors unless they were there to be helpful and 2) it's my house so I'm going to feed and pump where and how I feel comfortable. Those early days are critical to establishing supply and your breastfeeding relationship. If your goal is to EBF, you need to prioritize that over visitors.

ETA: @longliveregina is spot on. You're the mom. You get to make these decisions. This is just the beginning of your relationship with your parents and in laws as grandparents. There will be lots of other issues that come up. Setting healthy boundaries now will make a huge difference.

kristyn831 · February 2016

If you really want to establish your supply and not supplement, you need to nurse on demand. Limit visitors or nurse in front of them. Or go in another room and if it takes an hour, too bad. I learned very quickly that it was all about the baby and me and didn't allow
anyone but grandparents for at least 3 weeks.

I wasnt going to stress because people want to hold the baby. Breastfeeding is not always easy to establish and people need to back off.

shemmaemma · March 2016

Baby comes first! Breastfeeding and that bond between you two is waaaaay more important than entertaining visitors. People will understand, at least my visitors did. I was pretty much housebound for the first 3 months of my baby's life due to a few complications at delivery. So I got used to "peacing out" and going to a quiet room with my baby, actually looked forward to it!

srecupido · March 2016

Thanks again ladies. I've been standing my ground and we are making some progress. Also had an lc do a home visit to try and get us both better ( my low supply and his latching trouble ).

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