1st miscarriage

mommy2owl · February 2016

I have a lot of emotions going through my head right now, and I'm sure I'll post a full into later but one this is bothering me terribly right now. I miscarried naturally today after seeing baby with a heartbeat yesterday. I was at the grocery store and I can't quit thinking about how horrible it was to lose my baby in the toilet and have to flush her down. I just can't quit crying over that. I don't think I would've known where she even was with the amount of clots I passed but I feel terrible about it. Sorry to be graphic. I just can't stop thinking about it.

madamerwin · February 2016

I'm so sorry for your loss. I miscarried one week ago today - 24 hours after seeing and hearing the heartbeat, at 6w5d. I understand the shock of seeing a heartbeat one day, and then miscarrying the next. There had been some signs that I may miscarry - HSG levels were rising, but not doubling, and the ultrasound showed a smaller-than-normal gestational sac. But even with the doctor's warning that there was a possibility of miscarriage, there is nothing to prepare you for it, especially so soon after seeing a strong heartbeat.

Just wanted to let you know that I understand what you're going through, and I am so sorry.

danica01 · February 2016

My heart breaks for you my dear. Seeing our little ones and then loosing them so quickly leaves us no time to truly grasp what just happened. My miscarriage occurred on Friday and I saw the sac and the little tiny cord in the toilet. I was so devastated and could not just flush my child down the toilet. My dear husband came in and looked and held me as he did it for me. No one can even begin to prepare you for the feeling you get when you see the little one and knowing what has to be done. I cried for days going over and over everything that happened from the time I found out I was pregnant. I still do. Please remember we are here for you. We have all felt loss and know what you are feeling. Now is the time to grieve and please grieve at your own pace. Do not rush through it because you feel you have to. Be sad for as long as you need. Get mad and feel everything you need to feel. Stay in bed or on the couch until you are ready to face the world. Just allow yourself and your body time to heal.

I am sending you lots of hugs and supportive wishes. We are all here for you day and night.

mommy2owl · February 2016

Thank you ladies. I'm glad that forums like this exist. I feel like I had signs that I would miscarry but it happened very quickly.

BrightenMySky · February 2016

I am sorry for your loss. Even though I knew the chances of miscarriage and have many friends who have suffered 1st and 2nd tri losses, I was far from prepared for this. It really sucks. And those distinct memories that we carry now of how we found out and how it happens...it all sucks.

zrain · February 2016

I'm so sorry for your loss. We're all here for you. For me it helped a lot to figure out a way to honor the memory of my baby. I got a tattoo. Others have gotten jewelry or tattoos. I helps to have a reminder of that little life you loved so much. *hug*

roxgibbons · February 2016

I am so sorry you have to meet in this way and I am so sorry for your loss and the pain that you are feeling. Although I knew the miscarriage stats, I was certainly not prepared for the depth of pain I've felt since last week and this terrible feeling of sadness that is lingering. This board has helped so much. Please reach out and know we all understand how you feel and are here for you.

ThePax89 · February 2016

I am so very sorry! I agree with pp. try to find something to cherish. My husband and I are making a memory box. In it we are putting ultrasounds, my positive pregnancy tests, etc.

yolandamunoz · February 2016

I am sorry for your loss @mommy2owl

we all deal with our losses at our own pace, take your time to heal.

I've read somewhere -probably here- that our grief is like a weight you have to carry around. You seem fine and you carry it for ceirtan amount of time and then it gets too heavy and you drop it: get upset, cry, etc. So we eventually learn to carry this weight for a longer amount of time. We embrace our pain and make it our own.

I found this comparison really accurate for me and it helped me deal with my grieving process right now.

hugs
-y-

scifichick09 · March 2016

I'm so glad I found this thread. I too saw my little baby (the sac) in the toilet and flushed it, it was awful and I think about it all the time. I haven't told my husband yet, he's having a hard enough time dealing with this. I was at a friends house when it happened, so I have kept that depressing fact to myself until now. I am glad I'm not the only one who had this happen.

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