"Invisible Losses" - Losses after the loss

BornReady · February 2016

I'm not sure if anyone else follows "One Fit Widow" on Facebook. She is a woman who lost her husband and writes about grief and living life after loss. She posted something her friend wrote last night and it made me think of what makes grief after miscarriage so challenging even if it is geared towards loss of a spouse. Thought I would re-post for you all to read.

My dear friend, Christina over at Second Firsts calls them "Invisible Losses." Those losses that come after the loss.

Loss of a future planned

Loss of identity

Loss of financial security

Loss of friends

Loss of moments stolen and memories never created

The idea of grief being a process that is defined by timelines, rules or expectations is antiquated at best - dangerous at worst.

Grief is not a set of stages to be crossed or check marks to be completed but rather a transformation of the soul from the darkest recesses of life.

Grief is an experience of shifting, expanding and growing through painful and torturous heartbreak.

Grief is also an awakening of the senses and reminder of life's true value. Those touched by grief are gifted in the most profound of ways.

Invisible loss will be part of your journey. It is inevitable and undeniable. The part of your journey where you grow and become enlightened is optional and if missed a squelched opportunity to honor the love that was lost.

Something will grow from this pain and it will be you.