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STMs who coslept first time around

amarie1504amarie1504 member
edited February 2016 in October 2015 Moms
When did your LOs begin sleeping alone? I have recently begun cosleeping with my LO. He slept through the night from about 3 weeks-14 weeks but has started waking up not long after I put him to bed. We room share because DH and I aren't comfortable with him sleeping on a different floor of the house than us, which is where his nursery is, but until recently he has always used his own sleep space in our room. I never wanted to cosleep when he was really little, but now that he's a little bigger and older (18 weeks) I actually really enjoy it. The problem is he always tends to wake up in his PNP not long after I've fallen asleep for the night, so I never want to get out of bed at that point and rock him back to sleep. As a result, I've just been bringing him in the bed with me, and he tends to fall back asleep quickly and stay asleep for most/all of the night. I'm just curious as to whether getting him to sleep alone again will be an issue. Every night I continue to do the same bedtime routine with him that I always have (including putting him in his own sleep space to start the night) in hopes that it will help him remain familiar with sleeping in his own area. If you coslept with your DD or DS the first time around, at what age did they begin sleeping in their own space? I know I will miss him when he doesn't sleep with me anymore, but I also want him to be a good sleeper and sleep in his own space. Eventually we will want him to have sleepovers with Grandma and Grandpa. :) He is EBF, so maybe once he starts eating solids he will get better again?
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Re: STMs who coslept first time around

  • meganraschkemeganraschke member
    I'm a FTM so I don't have experience advice, we are in the exact same boat as you. I asked my pediatrician yesterday when I could expect LO to sleep well on his own. She laughed and said never. She said they'll always want to sleep in your bed with you, and that her 4 yr old is constantly coming downstairs to their bed. 

    A a month ago or so I posted on the 3-6 month board and the majority of the STM's said that 6 months they are easier to transition. 

    Im hoping the board is true, I love co-sleeping and I am sure I will miss LO when he starts sleeping in his PnP again. But co-sleeping for an exended period of time isn't practical. 

    Good of for you for still trying with putting LO down in the PnP. I gave up and just accept it every night and we start with him in bed lol
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  • chein1chein1 member
    DD1 is two and still sleeps with us. Either she starts the night with us or at some point she'll wake up and come in our bed. She woke up crying last night and was all pissed off because we were touching her. I told her it's our bed and if she doesn't like it she can go to her own room. She is extremely strong-willed and everything is on her terms (which will be great in 16 years when she's an adult and not my responsibility haha) but I know there's no real end in sight until it's her idea. My mom has told me I woke up in the middle of the night just to say hi until I was 4 so I'm not too worried. I'm a first grade teacher with 31 kids in a low socioeconomic area and my husband is a mechanic so both of our jobs are equally exhausting (mine emotionally and his physically) so for OUR family however we can get sleep is how we sleep. LO currently sleeps in a RNP in our room. We'll be moving her to the crib shortly. 
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  • kellisue1213kellisue1213 member
    I coslept with my older and he didn't start sleeping alone until around 7 years. And then it took a year to get him to sleep in his room versus the couch. There are still mornings I wake up to find him on the couch. I refuse to cos keep with my newest because of that. 
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  • skabanakskabanak member
    Lurker from N'15 :) I have a 6yr old and 3yr old who coslept with me up until 6-8months and then we transitioned them to their own beds. Took a couple days but they sleep in their own now and only occasionally want to have a sleepover in our bed which is fine. As long as you stick to your guns when you decide to put them in their own room, and keep a good routine they will eventually sleep in their own rooms. If you constantly let them come in your bed they will get used to it and it will be more of a fight. Could take a couple weeks but if you don't back down then it will work!! :) 
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  • amarie1504amarie1504 member
    @skabanak that's really encouraging and reassuring to hear, so thank you! :) DH and I have talked about it, and we are both fine with cosleeping for now while he is EBF and still so young. Once we get him on a good routine with solids during the day and out of his swaddle at night I want to transition him to his own sleep space. While he is still swaddled at nighttime I don't feel like it's fair to expect him to self-soothe in any way because he can't do anything. Lol! Once he is a little more mobile and we've transitioned him from his swaddle I will feel differently. Plus, I am hoping the fact that I've stuck to his bedtime routine and continue to put him down in his Pack N Play at the beginning of the night will help with this transition. I never start the night with both of us in bed (except one night when we both had terrible colds and went to bed two hours early). I think we are also in the thick of his 4-month sleep regression right now too, so hopefully once that is over we will have better luck again! Thanks for sharing your story! 
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  • amarie1504amarie1504 member
    @meganraschke I've heard the same thing about transitions being a bit easier at 6 months. Part of me loves LO sharing a bed with DH and I. I'm pretty sure if he does start sleeping through the night again soon I will feel super sad for a few nights not having him in bed. 

    I don't blame you for starting with your LO in the bed at all. The only reason I don't is because, surprisingly, LO has a hard time falling asleep this way. If he starts to wake in the middle of the night and I bring him into bed with me he's totally fine and falls right back to sleep, but if we start this way he's restless and doesn't doze off as well. If he did, I think I'd be doing the same as you! 

    Hope everything goes smoothly whenever you do decide to transition! :) I just remind myself that before I know it I will be longing for these days and nights of nursing LO next to me in bed and watching his little body slowly drift off to sleepy land. It truly does go too fast, even if it seems to drag when you're in the middle of the rough patches. 
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