How do you deal with breastfeeding in public?

Ozzy453 · February 2016

Yes I am a young mom. Yes I am at sitting in this quiet area breastfeeding. No this is not to me trying to give everyone a preview/sneak peek. No I cant wait until i get home, this isnt about me. My baby doesn't know why we have to wait yet. He doesnt even know that eating, sleeping, and pooping at the same time are not habits he should have growing up - one at a time! Sometimes this feels like someone pulling with pliers. My question to you? methods for breastfeeding? Can you control the urge?

Court11152325 · February 2016

I'm sorry, but no. Breastfeeding is not an urge to be controlled. And if you tried you could hurt your supply and have a very hungry baby. If you are embarrassed that your baby needs to eat, like any other human, you could return to your car. You could also bring a blanket/scarf/cover to use so that no one sees what you're doing. You could also try pumping and bringing bottles, but you would need to pump to replace those feedings.

I think some of the points you raised may be more your thing than the people around you. It can seem like we're being judged if we're already nervous to start.

What do you mean methods for breastfeeding? In public? You could try getting a carrier or wrap. It's more private that way. But the method itself is no different than at home.

rmarie13 · February 2016

I nurse wherever I need to. I've nursed on a bench on a street corner. I don't give a flying f### if I "offend" anyone. When my kid is hungry I feed her. Of course I prefer someplace private but if that's not possible then I have to do what I have to do.
I am discreet, or at least I'd like to think I am. Nursing tanks (imho) are the easiest and most discreet way to nurse. I wear them every day.
That being said, I do live in Europe where people aren't so weird about breast feeding. What is it with us Americans and our bodies?? It must be our Puritan roots.

dmendo01 · February 2016

I nurse in the car generally. DD is kind of spastic when she nurses so I can't cover her up. She rips the blanket off or screams bc she's getting hot. I would also not use a blanket but she likes to unlatch and relatch about 50 times during a session.

Mizuiro007 · February 2016

If you really don't want to breastfeed in public at all then you can pump and have a bottle. You can also sometimes plan around feedings and know you'll need to be home by a certain time.

Personally I breastfeed in the car because DD has decided she needs absolute quiet. It hasn't worked out yet that I can try one of the awesome mother's rooms that are becoming more common around town.

It's come up in discussions before but unfortunately breastfeeding in public still isn't a social norm. (There's also censoring telling us breasts and especially nipples are naughty bits not to be seen.) People see anything outside the expected norm and they tend to be shocked. The only thing for it is for women to continue to bf in public.

taysun · February 2016

I haven't yet nursed anywhere out of my house but the car. However I nursed in front of company under a blanket yesterday and it went fine so I'm feeling more comfortable about.
Previously I just prepared bottles.
But no you shouldn't be making your baby wait. It's not an urge it's a need.

Peanut1128 · February 2016

I bring a bottle with me normally, but I have breastfeed on the go a few times. I normally throw a swaddle muslin blanket over my shoulder and feed my baby underneath it. It's lightweight so he doesn't overheat and I'm covered. I have also just fed with no cover at the doctors office or in my car. I haven't experienced any comments or stares from strangers. If anything, I think my husband is the most uncomfortable with it.
I second the PP about nursing ranks. They keep your belly covered and allow you easy access to your boobs.

Bombmom3 · February 2016

As others have commented: your baby asking to nurse is a need, not an urge.

You have to do what is best for you and your baby and what you feel comfortable with. If you are comfortable nursing while out and about DO SO. I carry a wallet sized index card with my state's law protecting nursing mother's printed on it and also has a hotline to call with negative or positive comments and where a representative explains the law in case someone really gets all up in my business about it (so far I've never had to use it). Most times if someone is staring at you if you make a point to single them out and tell them how rude they are being they back off and leave you alone. They may say something ignorant and then it is your call whether you want to respond with something witty or just let it go. Bottom line is you're feeding your baby which means you are being an excellent mother.

laurabwalker · February 2016

I have a cover for moments that I may want privacy, I've nursed I'm my car a few times, I just do it when she wants it.

dec15mum · February 2016

I don't really care what others think, my kids needs food and he'll get it he shouldn't have to wait (it's either that or everyone hears him scream and they'd then change their minds quickly lol)
Might be easier for me to say that since its an offence to ask a nursing mother to leave a public area where I'm from

chewie5990 · February 2016

I've nursed in my car a few times or in fitting rooms a few times but lately I've finally become more confident about nursing in public. DH and I went to church 2 weekends ago and I brought a bottle for DS and my pump and figured I would just pump in the restroom while DH fed DS the bottle. On my way to the restroom I saw THREE moms nursing their LOs and I felt so stupid and ridiculous. After that I decided no more! There are still a few places I would rather take a bottle, but now I've started nursing more in public with a light weight cover and the more I do it the more comfortable I get.

However I I still can't seem to nurse in front of my inlaws...even with a cover I just feel so awkward about it..that will be the next hurdle I guess.

kdoak2015 · February 2016

I don't really understand your post, what are you asking? "Can you control the urge?" That's like asking if you can control your baby to eat, cry etc. Where you confronted today about bfing?
Ive found people to be very understanding when I need to feed my DD but usually nurse in the car. Last week I has getting my follow up 2hr blood work done as I had GD and they were amazing. Offered me a room half way through so I could nurse even though I said I was ok in the waiting room. I think sometimes people feel insecure nursing so we assume we are being judged etc.

ramfam2507 · February 2016

I just whip it out and use my cover.

ATolentino89 · February 2016

oregonmommy-2 · February 2016

I whip my boob out and feed my baby! If I have a scarf cool it helps make it a little more private. I can care less what anyone thinks. I can't cover baby with a blanket because he gets to hot and freaks out!

BrookeBrown2015 · February 2016

I breastfeed anywhere, in front of anyone. I just usually use a cover. I was fortunate enough to get 3 of them at a garage sale. Only paid like $5 for them, along with a couple other things. There have been times that I forgot my cover in the car/at home or lo was just so frantic I didn't want to bother with it and if I am out of town around strangers I don't really care. And my husband doesn't care.

grkgdss00 · February 2016

I try to find someplace quiet... Car, room, etc. if that isn't possible I have my cover and no one cares! Baby's gotta eat - that's #1 priority.

Catherine1021 · February 2016

I'm really uncomfortable nursing in public, but have had to do it many times now. I only wear shirts that I can unbutton or pull down for easy access for nursing. I can not get DD to latch while covered up, so I try to find an area or corner without a lot of people and get her to latch as discreetly as possible. It was especially difficult when I was still using a nipple shield. Thankfully DD is now able to nurse without the shield, which has made it so much easier. Once she's started eating, she usually doesn't mind being covered. One time I was at the park and a teenage boy was riding his bike, saw me trying to feed DD, stopped and stared at me. DD was really fussy and kept unlatching and I'm sure that kid got a few glimpses of my boob. My friend finally went over and said something to him, and he left. Other than that, I haven't really had any problems.

groovylocks · February 2016

I nurse at restaurants i know are ok with it. They deserve my business. Olive and I now nurse best lying side by side though so public nursing is rarely hugely successful. When the weather gets warmer, we can likely pull this off in the car.

FYI Moby (yes the musician) opened a restaurant called Little Pine. Today he shared a photo of a breastfeeding mum and said that all breastfeeding mothers are welcome to openly nurse at Little Pine and that if any patron has issue with that, they are welcome to leave. So if you're in the Los Angeles area..

Also FYI if you're anywhere near Ypsilanti Michigan, the owners of Bona Sera informed me they are also a breastfeeding friendly establishment. Most places in michigan i find are ok with it.

rmarie13 · February 2016

I can't believe places have to declare themselves as "breastfeeding friendly". I'd totally lose my sh#+ if I still lived in the states.

taysun · February 2016

I'm pretty sure depending on state laws, it doesn't matter if any place is breastfeeding friendly or not.
https://breastfeedinglaw.com

kksquared · February 2016

I pretty much BF anywhere DS needs it. I try and be discreet as much as possible. He hates the cover so I only use it at church and around my father in law. Everybody else I'm fine around. I also nurse DS in our ergo quite frequently which is very discreet and handy.

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