Baby Daddy Rants and Raves

dragonfly321 · February 2016

whether you want to kill hubby or SO, or want to give him the man of the year award... Vent about it here!!!
Mine is driving me BSC and baby isn't even here yet.

(I use baby daddy to encompass all the men... Not in a derogatory way

srecupido · February 2016

I don't know how to express my thanks to my DH right now. I knew he would be a great dad but he has also been an amazing partner these first few days. Constantly doing whatever he can to make sure baby and I are the best we can be, taking him for burping and walking the second after I feed him to let me get any sleep I can, making sure I'm taking care of myself by forcing me to shower and sleep, reassuring me during the multiple daily sob fests. best husband and dad award<3

dtaded13 · February 2016

My DH has always been amazing. I still manage to get highly annoyed though. I'm working on it.
He is good with the new baby but he's GREAT with our DD (5yrs). When he's home, she is his focus. They play outside, dance, do puzzles, sit and talk etc. Even before baby was born they had this great bond. I love watching them together and truly believe that's why I had to have a rough pregnancy was to help them bond more. She had to start relying more on daddy and it's been wonderful for both of them.

charliegoldengirl · February 2016

I'm not being fair and giving my husband attitude all morning because he slept for 7 straight hours and I slept for maybe 3 -40 min intervals. He is up and taking great care of our 2 yr old son while I'm snuggling the little one. I'm irrationally annoyed that his life is still relatively the same as it was five days ago. He sleeps, leaves the house, showers when he wants to, isn't dealing with the aftermath of pushing a 10 lb baby out of his body, etc. I'll be nicer after a nap (I hope) bc it's not his fault, poor guy.

ARogers26 · February 2016

My husband is amazing. He is a super hard worker. Takes awesome care of our son. And manages to be pretty dang hot while doing it. Swoon. Yesterday though he didn't shower and my highly sensitive nose was like dude. Shower. Now.

Eta. Autocorrect.

hnull · February 2016

Our baby isn't here yet (one day past due date today), but I can't wait to see what my husband is like! He's an only child and all his first cousins are 10+ years old than him and second cousins 15+years younger so he's never really been around babies before (pretty sure he held his first baby this year)! Lol. I think he will be great. For the last week whenever he gets home he asks "any contractions?!" It's pretty cute. Even though my answer is always no, it's nice that he is excited. He's been pretty great during my pregnancy cooks dinners on weekends, takes out the trash, washes dishes after i cook (a few times a week), cleans toilets etc.

Fullerj21 · February 2016

My H has been pretty helpful, especially with our 2 year old. The only time he has gotten on my nerves is when he mentions he is "tired". I'm sure he is tired but please don't complain to me, as I am up every 2ish hours breastfeeding the baby and getting minimal sleep.

lilqt3929 · February 2016

DH has been wonderful over this past week (DS is 12 days old). After I had a day of meltdowns because I didn't think I could take care of two kids on my own he decided to take an extra full day off work and then work half days the rest of the week to help me adjust to being home by myself with DS and DD (almost 2.5). Now just this weekend DD has been very sick (vomiting, runny nose, sneezing) and he's been a great help cleaning up after her, keeping her segregated from baby and I, went grocery shopping, helps MOTN with DS and DD (shes been waking at night a couple of times since being sick) and was not complaining that he had to deal with that all day on his birthday (yesterday). I'm dreading tomorrow when he starts back to work full time again

.

SU1989 · February 2016

My husband has been amazing. After going through labor with him and our first few days home I seriously love him more than I ever thought I could. And I see him in a whole different light now with out son. He's the first baby he has ever been around and he is doing amazing! And he has been so helpful around the house from walking the dog to making sure I have a meal since I'm always feeding! And he is always so encouraging telling me good job and that he's proud of me which helps me tough out the hard times through nursing. He's just been great! I cried like a baby when be went back to work because it was so nice having him with us. 3 days is not nearly enough.

meg+on+the+DL · February 2016

My husband has been awesome! He has been off for 2 weeks and has just been 100% there for me and the baby. When I am feeding in the middle of the night, he will change her diaper so I don't have to get out of bed. Last night he had to go back to work. Longest night ever! Cried so hard my eyes were almost swollen shut!

But really... I just love him and I appreciate him more than ever!

srecupido · February 2016

I love all these sweet DH stories! It sounds like many of them don't have much PTO with you ladies thou. Just curious since we battled with the amount of time we could both be home- DH took a new job about a month ago at the same company- how did everyone decide on timing and how are you ladies adjusting to husbands going back to work?

MississippiCatfish · February 2016

My DH has been really great about doing little tasks so that I don't have to get up. Just running to grab stuff from the kitchen or plug in my phone, etc. I totally appreciated it while 9 months pregnant and its been nice the last couple days while recovering too. Even though I have a feeling the enthusiasm will wear off pretty soon. He's been taking the brunt with the other kids too, which is so appreciated.

meg+on+the+DL · February 2016

@srecupido My husband just waited until I went into labor to take his leave. And thankfully he was home when it happened, so I didn't have to call him at work. And his company is AMAZING!! They offer 40 hours of paternity leave for the dads. So he was able to take 4 days off of work. And that doesn't even count against his personal leave, it's just something that his company offers.

cMichelle0423 · February 2016

My hubby a been awesome lately. He's been super helpful with our other two LO's, been giving me lots of time to relax and take baths or whatever I need to do, he's been pampering me with massages since I've been so sore lately, and even took me to get a mani/pedi today, followed by a trip to Panera! He's been such a trooper picking up the extra slack. I've been super exhausted lately and not in the best of moods so he's definitely getting an awesome husband award for putting up with me, on top of everything else!

Achae · February 2016

My husband was awful with our first, I remember feeling alone and resentful while he slept in and spent his four weeks at home playing video games and not getting up in the middle of the night. We had a huge argument about it for this baby and he has been 100% better. My recovery was a lot more difficult and he changed all diapers when home, brought baby to me every time he woke, snuggled baby at night so I could get some solid rest. He has been my rock when I'm exhausted and at the end of my short rope and he has the patience where I fail. Granted this last week he's been getting on my nerves as I haven't been waking him and he still complains about how tired he is, he hasn't been helping as much with other tasks so he can play video games "because he hasn't gotten to much" during his leave.

i am curious, how much "you" time do you ladies get and your husbands get a day or week? Maybe I am being too demanding and harsh on my expectations of him at home.

camusoh2011 · February 2016

DH got flustered with me today because in the midst of packing Aria woke up just starving. I was washing a few dishes at the time, and DH picked her up and headed to the freezer to thaw some breastmilk. I told him not to bother that I would be right with her to feed her, but he kept going anyway. I was irritated and let out a sly "or you can ignore me". What it boils down to is DH wants to help, but doesn't know when or how I'll get defensive about it. I feel bad when he gets up/stays up or gives them a bottle of my milk because I feel like those things are "my" job. He told me to stop thinking like that because it was stupid. In his own way it was a very sweet conversation. lol

dragonfly321 · February 2016

camusoh2011 said:

DH got flustered with me today because in the midst of packing Aria woke up just starving. I was washing a few dishes at the time, and DH picked her up and headed to the freezer to thaw some breastmilk. I told him not to bother that I would be right with her to feed her, but he kept going anyway. I was irritated and let out a sly "or you can ignore me". What it boils down to is DH wants to help, but doesn't know when or how I'll get defensive about it. I feel bad when he gets up/stays up or gives them a bottle of my milk because I feel like those things are "my" job. He told me to stop thinking like that because it was stupid. In his own way it was a very sweet conversation. lol

I feel like it will take a while for me to learn the give and take... I'm going to try to be as patient as possible with this new transition and know that SO is trying to help, even if I want to take the baby care world on my shoulders. I'm stubborn like that.

kbedfox · February 2016

DH cannot wake up to help overnight. He's the deepest sleeper and it's so annoying! I'm up several times throughout the night to feed/change the baby and to pump, and he doesn't wake up for any of it, even with the monitor on the loudest setting right beside his pillow. Tonight she screamed for a good 5 min while I was in the middle of pumping until I went to check on her myself. I've woken him up to get a bottle ready or to check her diaper, and he says ok and falls back asleep. Ugh I'm so exhausted!

srecupido · February 2016

Achae said:

My husband was awful with our first, I remember feeling alone and resentful while he slept in and spent his four weeks at home playing video games and not getting up in the middle of the night. We had a huge argument about it for this baby and he has been 100% better. My recovery was a lot more difficult and he changed all diapers when home, brought baby to me every time he woke, snuggled baby at night so I could get some solid rest. He has been my rock when I'm exhausted and at the end of my short rope and he has the patience where I fail. Granted this last week he's been getting on my nerves as I haven't been waking him and he still complains about how tired he is, he hasn't been helping as much with other tasks so he can play video games "because he hasn't gotten to much" during his leave.

i am curious, how much "you" time do you ladies get and your husbands get a day or week? Maybe I am being too demanding and harsh on my expectations of him at home.

We have been trying to tag team so we can both sleep when possible since when baby sleeps isn't an option. I'll feed and he'll change/rock. The only real me time I've had is a daily shower and any bathroom time. He's getting equally minimal self care time

srecupido · February 2016

meg+on+the+DL said:

@srecupido My husband just waited until I went into labor to take his leave. And thankfully he was home when it happened, so I didn't have to call him at work. And his company is AMAZING!! They offer 40 hours of paternity leave for the dads. So he was able to take 4 days off of work. And that doesn't even count against his personal leave, it's just something that his company offers.

Oh wow, my husband is entitled to 12 weeks paid from our company and I was grateful he was going to take 5 weeks. We have an extremely generous policy but there is still a strong stigma with men taking leave.

ladyofsummer · February 2016

DH was god sent today when I went into labor. He helped get me through contractions until it was too much for me, did all my hospital paperwork, and helped me get my epidural.

He was so scared when they decided on an emergency ultrasound after two hours of pushing (which he stood and held a leg for) but pushed through his fears for me.

He stayed by our LO's side until he got a good bill of health and then stayed by drowsy/sleepy/out of it me until it came time to let me hold LO.

You know you've married well when you've got a man who will hold you through contractions even if you're having a bowel movement. Bless him.

BabySeaTurtles · February 2016

ladyofsummer said:

You know you've married well when you've got a man who will hold you through contractions even if you're having a bowel movement. Bless him.

This!! I am currently in the hospital right now in the midst of labor (with epidural) but before getting here, I was on the toilet at home contracting with him holding my hands when I yelled out "I have to poop!" He just chuckled and told me to poop all I need. So I did. I am sure I will be teased about it later but his response was awesome.

lilqt3929 · February 2016

BabySeaTurtles said:

ladyofsummer said:

You know you've married well when you've got a man who will hold you through contractions even if you're having a bowel movement. Bless him.

This!! I am currently in the hospital right now in the midst of labor (with epidural) but before getting here, I was on the toilet at home contracting with him holding my hands when I yelled out "I have to poop!" He just chuckled and told me to poop all I need. So I did. I am sure I will be teased about it later but his response was awesome.

Good luck!! I hope you're snuggling your baby soon!

srecupido · February 2016

Awe @BabySeaTurtles !! Congrats!!!

MississippiCatfish · February 2016

Good luck @babyseaturtles!!

robinj716 · February 2016

Achae said:

My husband was awful with our first, I remember feeling alone and resentful while he slept in and spent his four weeks at home playing video games and not getting up in the middle of the night. We had a huge argument about it for this baby and he has been 100% better. My recovery was a lot more difficult and he changed all diapers when home, brought baby to me every time he woke, snuggled baby at night so I could get some solid rest. He has been my rock when I'm exhausted and at the end of my short rope and he has the patience where I fail. Granted this last week he's been getting on my nerves as I haven't been waking him and he still complains about how tired he is, he hasn't been helping as much with other tasks so he can play video games "because he hasn't gotten to much" during his leave.

i am curious, how much "you" time do you ladies get and your husbands get a day or week? Maybe I am being too demanding and harsh on my expectations of him at home.

This. Mine has been home with me for 3 weeks so far. He will be off for another week. The first two weeks he was great. Now he's resorted back to wanting me to make him lunch while he plays his video games and takes car rides. I can barely get a shower and brush my teeth. Oh yeah, I get up for every middle of the night feeding too. I'm irritated and my patience with him is really thin today. I'm exhausted.

DrillSergeantCat · February 2016

My fiancé gets up every time Harrison cries. He changes him and swaddles him then hands him to me to nurse. He makes sure that I put lanolin on my nipples and helps me make sure we have a good latch. When I first saw this thread, he was massaging my feet. He's just doing everything he can to make sure that I have whatever I need.

Vkrosa · February 2016

H has been helpful since all my kids are now sick including him. The only thing that is pissing me off is H hasn't showered in 3 days!!!! The BO smell is beyond disgusting and I can't take it. It is now causing arguments and I personally want to dump a bucket of soapy water on him while he sleeps. I don't know what to do.

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