TTC After a Loss
jmk17
member
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Frustration
jmk17
member
I apologize for this little pity party but I figured some of you have gone through this & can understand…
(1) I had a miscarriage in the middle of December and have been TTC the past month. I started temping the first day of my period, took OPK, and it looks like I ovulated on Day 13 (temp & peak OPK - although, not a lot of EWCM like I normally have)… I took an OPK 5DPO because I was feeling crampy & it was low… 8DPO I was having watery CM so I took another OPK & it was High (BD a few times from 1DPO - 9 DPO)… I am now 12DPO, still having those flashy smiles on my OPK, crazy lower back aches, very sore breasts, and a BFN this morning. I missed a few days of temping because we were out of town & I forgot BBT but have noticed my temp has continued to stay high. I'm going to test again in a few days since I know there's always a chance but I'm feeling like my body is still regulating. I miss my boring, basic, predictable, 28 day cycle that I had before the miscarriage.
(2) I would have gone into my 2nd trimester this week… that brought up crazy emotions that I wasn't expecting. Also, seeing friends find out they're pregnant has been tough and brought on guilt for feeling jealousy.
I honestly felt like I had this all behind me for the past month & now I'm back to being frustrated & angry… I know you won't have answers for me… I just felt like this was the best place for me to express my feelings since this can be so isolating even when you have such a great support system around you. Thank you for letting me vent my frustrations! xo
(1) I had a miscarriage in the middle of December and have been TTC the past month. I started temping the first day of my period, took OPK, and it looks like I ovulated on Day 13 (temp & peak OPK - although, not a lot of EWCM like I normally have)… I took an OPK 5DPO because I was feeling crampy & it was low… 8DPO I was having watery CM so I took another OPK & it was High (BD a few times from 1DPO - 9 DPO)… I am now 12DPO, still having those flashy smiles on my OPK, crazy lower back aches, very sore breasts, and a BFN this morning. I missed a few days of temping because we were out of town & I forgot BBT but have noticed my temp has continued to stay high. I'm going to test again in a few days since I know there's always a chance but I'm feeling like my body is still regulating. I miss my boring, basic, predictable, 28 day cycle that I had before the miscarriage.
(2) I would have gone into my 2nd trimester this week… that brought up crazy emotions that I wasn't expecting. Also, seeing friends find out they're pregnant has been tough and brought on guilt for feeling jealousy.
I honestly felt like I had this all behind me for the past month & now I'm back to being frustrated & angry… I know you won't have answers for me… I just felt like this was the best place for me to express my feelings since this can be so isolating even when you have such a great support system around you. Thank you for letting me vent my frustrations! xo
Re: Frustration
And I'm with you on changes to my cycle after a MC - this cycle and last I've had EWCM that hasn't coincided with a temperature shift like it did before my MC. So we ramp up BDing even further and burn out a bit by the time that I actually ovulate according to my temp shift.
Me: 33 & DH: 33
Married: 07/2006
TTC: 10/2015
BFP #1: 11/2015, MC 12/2015 (7 weeks)
BFP #2: 06/2016, EDD 2/15/2017
I am also about to enter what was supposed to be my second trimester and it hurts like hell. My miscarriage is on-going, and I find that physicality strangely comforting. I'm not sure how it will feel once that's over. One of my friends got pregnant around the same time as me, but her pregnancy was touch-and-go for a while, so I'm trying hard to focus on how happy I really am for her, but it does bring up a lot of emotion.
TTC 09/15
*TW Loss mentioned*
BFP 12/15/15 EDD: 08/26/16
MMC discovered 1/25/16 at 9 +3
TTCAL 3/2016
Acupuncture 11/16
Dx December 2016: unexplained
January 2017: 50 mg Clomid + TI =
BFP #2 01/30/17 Please be a sticky baby!
EDD: 10/15/17 Measuring ahead! 10/12/17
Ambrose born on his due date!
The only thing I can imagine being harder than this is my due date. Hopefully I'll have a healthy bean growing inside of me by then!
So many hugs to you. No part of this experience is positive.
Lucy 07-13-11
Violet 03-13-14
Conceived #3 since September 2015
11-25-15 twelve week loss
07-21-16 ten week loss
10-03-16 5 week loss
TTC again soon!
I had another friend announce that she is due the same week that I was in June. This brings the total of babies due the same week as my miscarried baby up to 4. I actually know 3 others who were also due that week who had MCs. What are the freaking odds?
I definitely feel the pressure to get pregnant soon so that I'm not so sad in June. My coworker can't shut up about his pregnant wife whose due in June and so I won't even be able to escape it by turning off Facebook or ignoring emails.
I am so appreciative for your notes and kind words… As painful as this all can be, it is comforting to have other people to talk to who are going through the same ups & downs of healing. I remember telling myself that once my period arrived after my MC it would be a fresh start for me and I could move forward with TTCAL… I never expected the waves of grief to come back & damn, they can hit hard.
I am truly so appreciative that you all took time to write a note back with your experiences…THANK YOU!!! xo
Married to
I hear you on the pregnancy announcements too. I would have reached 20 weeks last week and saw a slew of 2 week ultrasounds in my newsfeed. I have unfollowed all of them, but what are the odds that I would have 4 friends that share the same due date week as me? It just sucks.