2nd Trimester

Spousal seperation Anxiety

I am curious to know if anyone else is having separation anxiety from their spouse I am currently 22 weeks pregnant and when my husband even leave to go to work I become an emotional wreck he has to go away for work for a week coming up soon and even thinking about that has been giving me nausea and emotional tears. Is this me or is anyone else experiencing that

Re: Spousal seperation Anxiety

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  • There was a thread a while back about women feeling more "clingy" towards their SO. I think the additional longing to be with them is pretty normal...but not the the point where you're getting sick. If I were you I'd talk to my doctor just to make sure it wasn't some type of depression coming from the separation.
  • i felt anxiety when i was by myself for the first time with my daughter, emotional wreck but that was after birth and my first child. hormones can make you act different, i would talk to your dr though.
  • I had this last in my third trimester with my first child.  I wanted my husband to be near me at all times.  One time he went to the store while I took a nap.  I woke up and he wasn't there and I cried.  I'm going to blame that nonsense on hormones and nerves.

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  • My husband was gone from 5 weeks - 22ish weeks. It was rough being alone and I was an emotional wreck for the first few weeks but I got better. Definitely talk to your doctor about this. I don't think it's normal to puke/feel nauseous over this.
  • I do a little.  If he is even a little late i start freaking out that he got in a car accident.  I think it's a combo of two things.  we are using his brother for donor sperm and I just don't know how i would explain the whole thing if he weren't there.  Plus a friend's mom and grandma both just died in a car accident together.  So I'm a wreck.  I keep him warning that if he dies on me i will kill him.

  • Yes. I am miserable when he is not around and breathe a huge sigh of relief when he is there for me. We need them the most when we are vulnerable and I feel that this is natural. Our baby needs him too!
  • Thank you so much. I feel like i was going nuts crying all the time. I'm not used to feeling this emotionally overwhelmed and feeling I'm slowly drained
  • Lately, I've been feeling like I'm crazy with all the things running through my mind, especially having severe separation anxiety. Every time my SO goes anywhere, I get extremely insecure. I think he is going to abandon me or cheat on me. I just feel crazy with my feelings and thoughts.
    I have chronic depression and my OB is aware of this, being that I've been on antidepressant medications most of my life and I sometimes think they just don't help.
    Has anyone else dealt with something this severe?
  • @zemily91 I get those exact same fears to the point that it causes a bit of contention with my BF. It's definitely difficult but good on you for letting your OB know..have you talked to your SO about this?


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  • @zemily91

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    I would put these issues into therapy realm. An OB can tell you, yes, this could be part of pregnancy, but a therapist can help you work through your insecurities. If you see somebody, and you've not sorted it out yet, move to someone else. My therapist was good for certain things but not for some bigger stuff, so I changed to another woman. I, myself, am working on "radical acceptance" and mindfulness (I have anxiety, not depression--but they do travel hand in hand, and I was never sure what meds did for me). CBT can be helpful. I think it is always good to communicate your mind to your SO (not blaming, of course) but that often isn't enough, because there are bigger issues at  play. Just my two cents.
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  • I get anxious while my DH is at work. He works in a field that is dangerous and I pretty much have to just not think about it because it's out of my hands but I certainly don't like the feeling of him leaving when I walk him to the door everyday, and every night when he gets home I'm so thankful. He works at night and I usually cannot sleep well until he is home. He texts me often even while I'm sleeping so if I wake I can see that's he's ok and has texted recently.

    It's a hormonal time right now for sure, maybe that's causing you to be extra emotional about something that's more of a concern. Try to relax and stop worrying, because worrying won't do any good (as alice in wonderland says, I give myself very good advice but very seldom follow it)
  • can my husband just come home already?  I haven't seen him since last Friday (business trip) and only talked to him once on the phone.  
    He comes home sunday... sigh
  • I don't get anxious, but I definitely miss him more when I am pregnant. DH usually only travels a few times a year, but it worked out somehow that he's taking two week long trips a week apart and I hate it. A big part of it is that he's missing time with DD and I don't get any help when he's gone though. I'm a person that appreciates alone time.
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  • It's not unusual for my SO and I to take seperate vacations but this one has been so hard! We skyped the other day and I got so teary!! 8 more sleeps til I get home.
  • This is likely more of a hormonal / anxiety issue. Its ok to miss your spouse but important to know you'll be ok on your own as well.  Maybe each day make sure you have things planned so you will be busy and have your own projects no matter how small they are. Good luck!
  • Yup.  I have been super clingy to my husband since the second trimester began.  Thank you once again hormones for yet another way that I don't even recognize myself anymore.  People only seem to talk about nausea, but I love when people open up about the emotional things the hormones do to you because I think that is harder to deal with than feeling physically ill.  Your mind is who you are, and when you don't recognize it anymore, it can be scary.  Hang in there.  It will pass when you have the baby.  Try to remember that you have a part of your husband inside of you all the time now! ;-)
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