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Finding a new ob. Tips?

ThePax89ThePax89 member
in TTC After a Loss
(I'm currently benched. Waiting on my first period post d&c. This is my second loss in 10 weeks. One at 5 weeks, one at 10)

I delivered dd with this practice and had an amazing experience. My experience with my two losses has been horrendous. Though physically I felt well cared for, I felt like they didn't care of me emotionally through either loss, nor my pregnancy after the loss (telling me I was being overly anxious).

What do I need to look for to deal with a pregnancy after two losses. Doctors who do frequent scans at the beginning? (Does that exist?) A reproductive endocrinologist? I'm going to need some serious hand holding when I get KU again.
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Re: Finding a new ob. Tips?

  • BornReadyBornReady member
    Sorry for what you've been through. I'd check out some local OB offices and see what you think. It's a business after all and I think most offices are happy to give you some insight into what type of place they run. You could also ask around. We have a local "mom's group" on Facebook that lots of people use for questions like this. I've seen people get pretty good feedback.

    I think most importantly you have to feel safe and secure where you have your next pregnancy. It's not going to be easy emotionally I'm sure, so having people who can understand your anxiety, but also use their experience and rational minds is what I am seeking/feel like I have. What about having another provider for the "emotional" piece of the next pregnancy? Maybe a counselor to manage that anxiety piece and talk you down at times is more likely than having an OB who fulfills that expectation? Just thinking as I type! 

    As far as the extra scans etc. I don't know how many offices actually do that. I was high risk in my first pregnancy and only got 2 scans 1 @ 12 weeks and the other @ 20 weeks. I think the big issue is that insurance only wants to pay for so many, at least in my case. I paid a huge amount for the 2 ultrasounds I had with my miscarriage and my insurance paid for about 3/4 of it which was even more obviously. 
    Good luck to you!
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  • DinosaurJumperDinosaurJumper member
    I'm so sorry for your losses, I know how it feels when the OB just seems to tune you out as an "uneducated patient", and then in the end, the only one who got hurt was you. Personally, I do have a great respect for the medical field and all that they do. However, I want that respect reciprocated by my practitioner. In our little town there are really only two OB GYN's, and they are both very old men. My little town has a ridiculous amount of teen pregnancies, so they are very busy with tons of new moms everyday. Perhaps an OB with too many patients can make it hard to give each patient the attention they deserve. Anyways, so after DH and I started trying again after our loss, I checked out the recently opened birth center nearby. The midwife has been so kind and understanding. I've been able to go in just to checkup with her every few months, and can text/call her anytime with any questions. It really has made me feel better about the whole situation,and whenever we get our turn, we know we'll be in good hands :) So I guess you should shop around a bit on it, and hopefully you can find the right OB that treats you right :) Good Luck!

    I'm new to gifs, but I have a huge arsenal of memes!
    Wish I could make human babies like I make plant babies!

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    Married to  for 3yrs w/5 furbabies :*
    TTC for 2 yrs.
    One loss at 9 wks, May 2014
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  • ThePax89ThePax89 member
    @BornReady I guess by emotional needs I mean putting my mind at ease with testing, etc. I'm not looking for handholding, counseling, or compassion- just information. I know it may not make a difference, but I just want to identify a possible issue before I lose another baby.
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  • BooksForMe23BooksForMe23 member
    My OB said she would do weekly HCG draws for me as soon as I find out I'm pregnant next time, and I've had one miscarriage.  I would think most OBs would be willing to do at least that, but I could be wrong.
    TTC #1 since June 2015
    BFP #1 Nov 2015 ended in MC Dec 26 2015
    BFP #2 Feb 2016, EDD Nov 8 2016




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  • RiverSong15RiverSong15 member
    I'd recommend asking around from female friends and family members for recs, and make sure you ask them WHY they like their doctor. Also, you can occasionally find online reviews. I found my PCP by looking online for practices people liked, and were highly rated, and then reading how the doctors described themselves on their webpage. I looked for a doctor who said she liked building the doctor-patient relationship, and that was the key phrase for me. I love my PCP - she listens to my concerns, answers all my questions, and I never feel rushed. If you have a good relationship with your own PCP, you can ask him/her for recs too, and you'll be more likely to find a person like them.
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  • ThePax89ThePax89 member
    @BooksForMe23 I would love this. I had a m/c in November and got pregnant again immediately. The doctors were very apprehensive to do any testing at all. I was persistent and eventually just straight up demanded testing. I ended up losing that baby. But the testing kept me positive in the interim. 
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