baby shopping blues

DebraG421 · January 2016

Does anyone else get annoyed with all the preparations? I feel like there is such pressure in our society to be Dolly Domestic and have all our little ducks in a row with our organized little checklists in hand when regular life was just busy enough on its own! I spent a total of 4.5 hours looking at cribs and still haven't chosen one for example! And then it further makes me feel incompetent when I can't even figure out how to open the stroller at the store... like I need more reminders that I don't know what I'm doing? This stuff is supposed to be fun, right? People shower you with gifts and you get to decorate a cute little nursery. But then it's not because you have to consider budget, safety, space, practical use, and reliability. I get a headache after awhile of shop comparing. I just want to be done and enjoy what time I have left of my "old life." And then before we got pregnant we were supposed to remodel our condo to create some more storage space and that hasn't gotten done yet either. As the clock ticks down, I get more worried. I just want to be done and ready already!

PrimRoseMama · January 2016

Don't overthink-- really. Its not that complicated. Find stuff that you like and go with it. The rest will all be trial and error. There is no magic manual and no one really knows what they are doing. You take the whole parenting thing by the horns and fly by the seat of your pants. You'll make it.

Knottie1442268460 · January 2016

Amazon.com! Read reviews. Then only look at your narrowed list.

PinkLady2015 · January 2016

Lucieslist.com was the best thing I ever read... Great recommendations. My DH and I spent ten minutes trying to unlock the car seat from the base before we asked someone and realized the lever was in the back... Derp. This shit is tough, give yourself a break. I've looked at over 200 crib bedding sets and hate everyone... You'll figure it out soon enough!!

PhoebeJune1984 · January 2016

I agree with Lucieslist. Start there, don't think too much into it, and go from there. I guess being a STM, you kind of learn all of the things that you can't live without, and the things that you thought you would use and never did. With my first, I thought that the nursery had to be done (realistically, she didn't sleep in there until she was 2 months old), I thought I had to have every baby gadget, tons of clothing (she probably wore half out of each size collection, before she outgrew them), and more toys and entertainment things than needed. With this baby, we were like "carseat, diapers, wipes, some footie jammies, Ergo, and a place to sleep. Done." And that isn't even because we already have a ton of stuff from DD, because we don't.....we lived in a small house and got rid of 60% of her items. Its just at this point, we know the things that are needed, and the things that are just novelties....

austinjl · January 2016

Im fully expecting registering and reviewing things for safety will be a pain in the ass. My husband thinks it will be fun. Unmmmmmm no....

LinzerBinzer · January 2016

I totally feel you. I am overwhelmed thinking about registering (which I need to do soon). The lists don't help. Things like "baby carrier" or wrap thingy whatever it's called are not helpful. There are a bajillion. And Lucies List is great and all, but frankly, I need Rosie Pope (or whoever) to just swoop in and do it all for me.

jonesl12 · January 2016

I think you are stressing too much and turning an exciting learning experience/opportunity into more of a hassle or a chore.
Try to relax and read some reviews, narrow things down, and remember that all the baby really needs is you, milk, clothes ,and diapers. The rest is much less important.

michellabanana · January 2016

Babies r us people were super amazing and helpful! Using their list, my husband and I will only go in and do one section at a time. That way we don't get overwhelmed. We only have the furniture done right now. But the ladies were amazing!!! (I swear I don't have stock in babies r us lol)

I have a secret for the more complicated stuff, I'm asked my sisters to come with me to help register. They know everything! But I'm taking them to lunch afterwards.

michellabanana · January 2016

@PinkLady2015 did you check out land of nod? I didn't like a lot of crib bedding either! But I liked there stuff...it seems more subdued and not overwhelming than most

PinkLady2015 · January 2016

michellabanana said:

@PinkLady2015 did you check out land of nod? I didn't like a lot of crib bedding either! But I liked there stuff...it seems more subdued and not overwhelming than most

not yet, I'll check it out! thanks for the heads up

noelietrex · January 2016

First world problems are tough

I hear you though honestly. You know letting yourself off the hook is an option too right? Don't tell the other moms here, but I put together my registries willy-nilly in most categories. Cute bottles that match pump? Perfect. Grass drying rack is "popular item"? I'll take one. Probably need some place for baby to sleep- I'll take the popular crib in my price range in brown. Done! Even for the carseat I googled "safest carseat" and chose the medium sized one from the brand that popped up first in search (hey they paid a lot of money to be optimized for that search term). Baby gear currently being sold all has to meet the same safety standards. Unless you're buying second hand you don't need to worry about recall items because if something is recalled stores take it off the shelves. If you want to research and read reviews, go for it. If you don't, grab one of the many registry starter templates, customize where you feel like it, and call it a day. No one is keeping tabs on this stuff or handing out gold stars. Also no one knows what will really work for their baby until it's here anyway. Grab the essentials and let the rest fall through the cracks if it's easier for you. You're doing a great job- parenting is a sh!t show regardless of how organized things look from the outside. Choose your battles. Choose the hills you throw down and die on carefully- emotional energy is a limited resource.

LadySamLady · January 2016

I am not a planner by nature and definitely get overwhelmed with all of the to-dos. You just have to take it one step at a time and try not to let the pinterest moms get in your head too much. We are very slowly getting things ready. We bought the stroller and dresser/changing table but haven't taken them out of their boxes. We've given ourselves until the end of March to crack them open (I'm due 4/30) and that feels like plenty of time. No need to hurry up just to wait if that's not your thing. I am another big fan of Lucie's List. You could literally register or buy all of her recommended Registry Basics without putting much thought into it and be done.

DrillSergeantCat · January 2016

Just remember that on crib bedding, all you need is sheets and a mattress protector. There shouldn't be anything else in there...no comforter, bumper pad, or toys. That should save you some time and money.

DominiqueU · January 2016

@noelietrex I definitely put that grass drying thing on my registry too. My husband lost his mind over it... He scanned every twig/flower/fly accessory that went with it. Do we need that? No. Is it adorable? You betcha.

PhoebeJune1984 · January 2016

noelietrex said:

First world problems are tough I hear you though honestly. You know letting yourself off the hook is an option too right? Don't tell the other moms here, but I put together my registries willy-nilly in most categories. Cute bottles that match pump? Perfect. Grass drying rack is "popular item"? I'll take one. Probably need some place for baby to sleep- I'll take the popular crib in my price range in brown. Done! Even for the carseat I googled "safest carseat" and chose the medium sized one from the brand that popped up first in search (hey they paid a lot of money to be optimized for that search term). Baby gear currently being sold all has to meet the same safety standards. Unless you're buying second hand you don't need to worry about recall items because if something is recalled stores take it off the shelves. If you want to research and read reviews, go for it. If you don't, grab one of the many registry starter templates, customize where you feel like it, and call it a day. No one is keeping tabs on this stuff or handing out gold stars. Also no one knows what will really work for their baby until it's here anyway. Grab the essentials and let the rest fall through the cracks if it's easier for you. You're doing a great job- parenting is a sh!t show regardless of how organized things look from the outside. Choose your battles. Choose the hills you throw down and die on carefully- emotional energy is a limited resource.

Love my Boon grass drying rack. I will fight a b*tch that tries to take that thing away from me! Shoot for the Lawn, instead of the Grass. You won't regret it!

PhoebeJune1984 · January 2016

@DrillSergeantCat Word! I am actually surprised after all of this time, bedding sets for infants are still popular. The bumper you cannot use, the comforters are always stiff and uncomfortable. So you are paying a ridiculous amout for a crib sheet and a crib skirt. No thanks.

DrillSergeantCat · January 2016

PhoebeJune1984 said:

@DrillSergeantCat Word! I am actually surprised after all of this time, bedding sets for infants are still popular. The bumper you cannot use, the comforters are always stiff and uncomfortable. So you are paying a ridiculous amout for a crib sheet and a crib skirt. No thanks.

Exactly! My crib skirt was $10 and so were the sheets. Or I could get a set for $150 that I'd only be able to use 2 pieces of.

PhoebeJune1984 · January 2016

DrillSergeantCat said:

PhoebeJune1984 said:

@DrillSergeantCat Word! I am actually surprised after all of this time, bedding sets for infants are still popular. The bumper you cannot use, the comforters are always stiff and uncomfortable. So you are paying a ridiculous amout for a crib sheet and a crib skirt. No thanks.

Exactly! My crib skirt was $10 and so were the sheets. Or I could get a set for $150 that I'd only be able to use 2 pieces of.

I ended up just painting my DD's room a color that kind of went with anything, and then "decorated" by switching the sheets out. Really helped with my indecisiveness on how I wanted to decorate. I made all of the little bins on her shelves a cream color, so they would go with anything, and then just coordinated the changing pad to the sheet theme. In the end, I had like 5 different sheets of different colors/patterns, and coordinating changing pad covers for each of them. It was like the room got a new feel, every week. LOL

RachieTK · January 2016

I'm Jewish, and we traditionally have nothing baby related in the house prior to the birth. I was registered, and my mom had some early days essentials (bassinet and coming home outfit) at her house for us, but nothing was in our home before our son was born. The only slight bending of the rules was that we had the car seat installed by the police before the baby was born. You don't need a lot to start. Don't overdo it if it isn't fun.

PugsandKisses · January 2016

All cribs, strollers, high chairs, car seats must meet the same safety requirements.

As for a crib. 1) figure out your budget. 2) decide if you want a standard one or a convertible one (meaning they can go to a toddler bed and what not). 3) pick out your color wood: dark, white natural. 4) decide if you want it to part of a matched set, like dresser, table..... or that it can be a stand alone.
2 and 3 can be switched. For example, I like dark wood. I am not a fan of white and 'natural' just looks unfinished to me. So I was able to ignore a good chunk of furniture. I wanted a matching set. So I found a few sets that is dark wood and went from there.

No one just knows how to use strollers and car seats. Ask the workers at the store. They can show you the basics.

I like the book Baby Bargains a lot more than Lucy s list. They explain the different type of seats and strollers, and the pros and cons of each one. Then they gave the mains ones a rating based on recall history, patient satisfaction and customer service. Other wise it seems like you need 9 strollers, when BB help me figure out the two I wanted. Lucs list promotes certain products, which I already knew that they were not a good first for us.

ammnam14 · January 2016

Don't make it harder than it needs to be. DD is 6 weeks old tomorrow and so far I've learned that she really only needs food, diapers, and a place to sleep. DD sleeps in a bassinet by our bed so the crib is useless for us right now. Yeah she has an adorable nursery but we are never in there! I feel like I wasted a lot of time/money working on something we never use. Sigh.

As for choosing a crib, stroller, car seat, etc..they all have to meet the safety standards (in the us anyways) so it's really up to your budget.

huskypuppy14 · January 2016

Omg, I was getting so frustrated at BRU. My husband and I were trying to get the carseats off the base and we couldn't figure it out. I thought I had to press two buttons at the same time, I'm thinking how am I going to this with a baby. Then one of the workers asked if we needed help. He showed us it was the handle at the back, I felt like an idiot, but I'm sure it happens all the time.

Like others said, there are so many options, just pick one in your budget and be done with it. Trying to decide between 3 cribs that all essentially look the same is ridiculous.

PinkLady2015 · January 2016

huskypuppy14 said:

Omg, I was getting so frustrated at BRU. My husband and I were trying to get the carseats off the base and we couldn't figure it out. I thought I had to press two buttons at the same time, I'm thinking how am I going to this with a baby. Then one of the workers asked if we needed help. He showed us it was the handle at the back, I felt like an idiot, but I'm sure it happens all the time.

Like others said, there are so many options, just pick one in your budget and be done with it. Trying to decide between 3 cribs that all essentially look the same is ridiculous.

Yup, struggled for a solid 10 minutes with those two buttons getting insanely frustrated before we asked for help. The employees probably have a hidden camera in that section and laugh hysterically at this all day long.

michellabanana · February 2016

Aughhh....my husband is so frustrating! His mom told us to register for a stroller so she can get it for us. Well I have this 20% coupon and said we should get a big thing with it. Well he thinks we're going to get so much stuff at our baby shower. Just wait. But I'm like we might not get anything of our registry, we can't bank on that! Boys are so frustrating!

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