Serious lack of sex drive :(

xtraumaxqueenx · January 2016

So, for the last several weeks, my sex drive has become absolutely nonexistent. I have zero desire whatsoever and it's driving me a little nuts as my hubby and I are usually pretty amorous. Thankfully DH is very understanding and once I told him that I just have no desire, he was perfectly okay and has been very supportive.

Anyone else have this issue? When did it go away?? Any recommendations for improving libido?

Thanks ladies!

AdorkablePixie · January 2016

I'm in the same boat but I've kinda been this way since coming off of BC over two years ago.

I still like to DTD and make sure we do it at least once a week, but getting "in the mood" takes a while for me sometimes. It's upsetting. I'll be following this threat to see if anyone else has ideas!

wildtot · January 2016

It will come back eventually. Last time we had sex was when Baby was conceived. I've had issues since the beginning. No sexy time till we are close to the due date. Sucks when sex drive kicks back in and can't do anything.

jonesl12 · January 2016

I'm the opposite! I've been on pelvic rest since I was 11 weeks and I'm 29 weeks now. I wish I even had the option to have sex with my husband.

Lyette1206 · January 2016

I haven't since I got pregnant. And I didn't have much of a sex drive when I was pregnant with my DD either. It didn't come back until about 6 months after she was born.

Luckily for me, my husband has been so exhausted from all the extra work he's taken on with our toddler that his drive has gone away too. So it hasn't been a relationship problem.

fourtsixand2 · January 2016

I hear y'all!!! My sex drive is non-existent. I mean, non-freakin-existent. It seems like every time I proposition it, I get busy with this or that or just flat-out fall asleep. DH has been so great about working his butt off with the nursery, closet, or whatever task we have around the house, we're both exhausted.
We were much more active the first and second trimester, but as of the last few weeks it just hasn't happened. He's been so fantastic about it though. I know I need to suck it up and force myself to get in that mood from time to time, for both of us.

kyraaD · January 2016

it's pretty common, from what i hear. a lot of women lose their sex drive while pregnant, especially during 1st Tri. but dont worry! a lot of women have sex drive spike in 2nd Tri, so hopefully that'll happen for you & DH

sarahufl · January 2016

I have a sex drive. I also just have a HUGE belly that makes the actual act really awkward for me. Get your sexy times in while you still can

KelBelleBaby · January 2016

I had that issue as well. I didn't get my sex drive back until 20+ weeks and then I wanted it all the time. I'm almost 28 weeks and am once again anti-sex due to discomfort in some areas. Hoping it comes back again. My SO is very understanding but I would like it back.

kalanieileen · January 2016

What is a sex drive? I haven't had that for the past 7 months and I'm assuming this dry spell (literally and figuratively) is here to stay for a while.

ladylolly89 · January 2016

sarahufl said:

I have a sex drive. I also just have a HUGE belly that makes the actual act really awkward for me. Get your sexy times in while you still can

This.

PinkLady2015 · January 2016

Watch or read porn. I'm serious. Find a line of books that turns you on whether its Fifty Shades of Grey or one of the copy cat series (Sylvia Day, Maya Banks, etc) and read it before bed, or find some (free) porn website and figure out what you like and either watch beforehand or with your SO. Also, sometimes the motivation comes after you've started, so maybe ask SO to give you a sensual massage and let things go from there. You may not initially be in the mood but once things get started you'll probably be good to go!

Edited: free PORN site, not free PROM site... jesus christ autocorrect...sorry folks!!!

Clauni27 · January 2016

I thought I was all alone on this.
So many of my girlfriends spoke of the 2nd trimester as being really good for their sex drive and I've just been waiting for it to kick in for me.
My husband has been understanding and great but it's definitely not doing anything good for our relationship.

I'm so out of practice and since my body is a different size and shape I can't imagine how it would go if I ever did get my sex drive back.

AdorkablePixie · January 2016

They say your libido spikes in the second tri, but not mine. We still have sex, like I said, but like @PinkLady2015 said, the motivation doesn't come until we've started.

I know sometimes I have dreams, and I wake up from those ready to go. Unfortunately it's usually when my husband is at work or I've spent the night somewhere else and he's not around!

Sex felt AMAZING in the first trimester... not so much this trimester. It just feels weird a lot of the time, it will feel good too, but more weird than ever before.

sarahufl · January 2016

AdorkablePixie said:

They say your libido spikes in the second tri, but not mine. We still have sex, like I said, but like @PinkLady2015 said, the motivation doesn't come until we've started.
I know sometimes I have dreams, and I wake up from those ready to go. Unfortunately it's usually when my husband is at work or I've spent the night somewhere else and he's not around!
Sex felt AMAZING in the first trimester... not so much this trimester. It just feels weird a lot of the time, it will feel good too, but more weird than ever before.

I have to agree. My husband is.....super....motivated. He oddly finds my blimpy body sexy

I don't initiate these days because I just feel ultra awkward. But he does. Sometimes it just takes me a minute.

I am in NO WAY advocating submitting to your H, but I know it always ends well for both of us, so unless I am feeling really terrible, I like to give it a shot and I am always happy I did.

xtraumaxqueenx · January 2016

Thanks so much for all the encouragement, advice, and commiseration ladies!!! Wow does this ever make me feel better, just knowing I'm not the lone ranger!

I told DH he may just have to jump me soon cuz I'm not sure I'll ever be the one to initiate at this point and it's been WAY too long since we've been intimate. We're both feeling the strain and increased stress in our relationship and neither of us like it at all.

I'm sure once we get started, I'll be happy as a lark, I just don't remember even liking sex at this point, so getting started seems like way more work than it's worth

Really appreciate everyone's thoughts!

blissylissy86 · January 2016

My sex drive has been dead and gone for a while. If hubby initates and I don't feel too awful, we have sex. It generally turns out really nice, even if sex is the furthest thing in my mind

stillcozy · January 2016

xtraumaxqueenx said:

Thanks so much for all the encouragement, advice, and commiseration ladies!!! Wow does this ever make me feel better, just knowing I'm not the lone ranger!

I told DH he may just have to jump me soon cuz I'm not sure I'll ever be the one to initiate at this point and it's been WAY too long since we've been intimate. We're both feeling the strain and increased stress in our relationship and neither of us like it at all.

I'm sure once we get started, I'll be happy as a lark, I just don't remember even liking sex at this point, so getting started seems like way more work than it's worth

Really appreciate everyone's thoughts!

For me it was hard to get back into it and the idea didn't sound good after all the morning sickness but once we did I found it way more enjoyable then before I was pregnant and find that now I want to initiate even more.

satuttle1014 · February 2016

DH and I have had sex at least once a week the entire time. Once I got to the middle of my 2nd tri, I found myself initiating more than usual. However, It came in waves for me, sometimes it's just not there which is okay.

jkeezy · February 2016

I'm well into the third trimester and it's just come back for me in the last week or so.

everyone is different, but what you're feeling is normal. the other thing to note is that when/if you do it, be warned it might not feel the same - some women are extra sensitive down below during pregnancy which can uh..expedite matters, and others can find it difficult to orgasm.

arcanejinx · February 2016

I have 0 desire for sex. During the second trimester I had a slight interest but I also injured my hip which caused a lot of issues. Try not to worry about it-listen to your body and be truthful with your DH. Mine is jokingly counting down the days till baby is out and I feel more like myself but completely gets that I'm just not into it and is fine.

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