- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
May 2016 Moms
tgortney
member
Anyone else still worry? (2nd trimester)
tgortney
member
Hey ladies, just wanted to see if anyone else is having similar feelings.
It seems we're all almost to viability stage (and that's freakin awesome!). I'm 24w5d and I still have a stupid feeling something might go wrong. It's so hard to stay positive sometimes. I had some anxiety before being pregnant and I think it's been escalated by hormones, especially in the first trimester.
This is all sparked by a girl I know who lost her baby in early September of last year (at full term, he was still born), right when I found out I was pregnant. This is my first ever pregnancy and we got pregnant on the first cycle. It seemed too good to be true but here we are.
So far, every appointment has been quick and normal. No concerns from the ultrasounds or any of the peace of mind genetic testing we've done. As far as we can tell, baby boy is doing great and growing ahead of schedule.
Point is, I feel like I'm a glutton for pain because I keep looking at that girl's Facebook and seeing her happy maternity photos. Then she posts how bad she is hurting and how hard it is for her to move forward every day. I feel so bad for her. It really makes me appreciate what I'm experiencing now (all the kicks and movement from baby). I can't and don't want to imagine how much she is hurting.
I understand that this is what I signed up for, if it's not one thing about being a parent. It's another. But I just can't wait to hold my baby in my arms!
It seems we're all almost to viability stage (and that's freakin awesome!). I'm 24w5d and I still have a stupid feeling something might go wrong. It's so hard to stay positive sometimes. I had some anxiety before being pregnant and I think it's been escalated by hormones, especially in the first trimester.
This is all sparked by a girl I know who lost her baby in early September of last year (at full term, he was still born), right when I found out I was pregnant. This is my first ever pregnancy and we got pregnant on the first cycle. It seemed too good to be true but here we are.
So far, every appointment has been quick and normal. No concerns from the ultrasounds or any of the peace of mind genetic testing we've done. As far as we can tell, baby boy is doing great and growing ahead of schedule.
Point is, I feel like I'm a glutton for pain because I keep looking at that girl's Facebook and seeing her happy maternity photos. Then she posts how bad she is hurting and how hard it is for her to move forward every day. I feel so bad for her. It really makes me appreciate what I'm experiencing now (all the kicks and movement from baby). I can't and don't want to imagine how much she is hurting.
I understand that this is what I signed up for, if it's not one thing about being a parent. It's another. But I just can't wait to hold my baby in my arms!
Re: Anyone else still worry? (2nd trimester)
Yes, I worry constantly. It's a low-grade nagging disquiet at the back of my mind at all times. My first daughter was growth-restricted (which we found out around 24 weeks), and was delivered via c-section at 28 weeks at 1 lb 2 oz, which is micro-preemie territory. She survived in the NICU for 7 weeks, but ultimately succumbed to an infection and never made it home.
It is hard to let go of the worry, or more accurately maybe to keep functioning daily in spite of the worry. I know that I will feel a little bit better after I hit 28 weeks, but I won't be 100% until I have the baby in my arms. I try to have faith in the process, trust my body, and busy myself as much as possible with other projects so the time passes more quickly.
I don't think it's possible to not worry. Especially if you've seen this happen to someone close to you.
My advice is to try not to think about what could happen and to tell yourself, "Today I am pregnant and my baby is alive and I will cherish every moment of it."
And so I'm incredibly superstitious and try to avoid saying anything definite about the baby (I use a lot of "hopefully" and "expected" language) and I try to remind myself not to count on anything: we could all die tomorrow anyway.
I know that sounds horribly depressing, but it serves for me as a reminder not to take anything for granted and to be thankful for what I have. I sincerely hope everything works out with this baby (who just kicked me for being a superstitious twat, apparently), but I am happy to be pregnant now and that is all I can for sure count on. Which I find comforting.
My aunt lost a term baby to a cord accident and my sister lost a term baby for a reason no one knows. Nothing is promised, so I try to revel in every kick and twinge.
I also have 2 beautiful healthy little girls, and the worrying never stops
I am always worried...and I worry about my son, who's now three. I worried he wouldn't make it birth, I worried he would die of SIDS, I worry that he'll climb something and it will fall on him, I worry he'll get a terrible illness...I'm sure I'm making myself sound paranoid, and don't worry, I'm not--this is all just to say that you will never stop worrying about your kids. You'll worry when they start to walk, when they go to school, when they start dating, when they learn to drive...the list goes on. My dad commented over the holidays, when my brother and SIL drove 3 hours in some tough rain, "Your kids are always your kids. You guys are in your 30s with kids of your own and I still worry about you."
It's the nature of being a parent.
I feel you. I'm constantly panicked.
And to echo the sentiments of others, the worry never stops.
Due with baby boy # 2 in May 2016
DD #1 born January 2014
I'm not doing too bad with the worry so far, as long as I don't think about it. I would stay away from dwelling on sad stories of other people though - yes, acknowledge and sympathize appropriately, but now is definitely not the time to be letting your mind wander over to negative possibilities too much if you can avoid it!
To the ladies that shared their loss stories, your positivity really is amazing! I'm so sorry for your loss. I know it's hard to share but it is beautiful and inspiring.
The long road of parenthood must be worth it or else we all wouldn't be here
BFP #2: 10/8/14, EDD: 6/22/15, MC: 11/13/14 (D&C)