heyy a mommy rant!!! — The Bump
September 2015 Moms

heyy a mommy rant!!!

I am a FTM and it's very hard these days I feel my son is behind but the doctor says he's not. I know I shouldn't compare my child to others but I'm only human! My son hasn't start rolling over, sitting up, crawling,using a sippy cup, drinking jucie, and eating table food? My son was born 4months ago and 3 co workers/ mommy friends there babies were born 2 weeks before ,4 days before, and a day after my son. There always tell me about there kids there already walking, sitting up with no support, using Sippy cups, rolling over, have teeth. And I'm going crazy because my son just lays there and he HATES toys and will kick and screen and try to bite during tummy time. Please help ease my mind thanks :)

Re: heyy a mommy rant!!!

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  • Your coworkers are way exaggerating (or 1 is and the other moms feel embarrassed so they join in and say their kids are doing it too). None of the things you listed are age appropriate aside from rolling over and that usually begins at around 4mo. Dd has done it once and I have 0 concerns that she is delayed.

    Teeth have no baring on development and it's a very wide range of when first teeth erupt ranging from babies being born with teeth (incredibly rare) to having their 1st tooth erupt at 1+ year old. My kids have all gotten teeth late and had no issue eating despite having no teeth (even meats! Their gums are harder than you think!) Honestly, it can be more harmful than good to try and push your baby to do things they aren't developmentally ready for (i.e. walking, sitting up unassisted, zippy cups). Some of those things could even be signs of issues like hypertonia which is more of a concern than a 4 month old not sitting up unassisted.

    I'm assuming your pediatrician will do a developmental screener at each appointment and unless they raise any red flags do not worry!
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    vibarra27jen83mn
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  • They sound like liars. Crawling at 4 months? That's crazy. Walking??? That can't be real. Teeth I can believe, but I know perfectly healthy kids that didn't get teeth til 12 mo.
    Anyways, maybe these babies are but it doesn't mean your baby is behind. They all hit milestones at different ages. At 21 months my first only had 3 words, 3 months later she's talking my ear off. So she had a delay in language but was hitting every other milestone for her age plus milestones that are expected of 3 years olds.
    Don't worry, especially if doctor isn't worried. And rolling.....I've known lots of babies that hate tummy time, won't roll at all one day, then the next it's a constant thing.
    jen83mnJenLovesDesign
  • They're not over exaggerating I've actually seen it first hand one of my coworkers sons is walking its just he takes a couple steps then falls he hasn't gotten it fully down yet and then the one that was born four days before my son he's already gotten the spoon eating and sippy cups. I'm stay at home mom and with my son all day and it feels like I don't accomplish anything when he just lays on his tummy time mat and screems and then try to bite me even tho he has no teeth. I just feel really crummy all day long knowing that everyone else he's not a stay at home on their kids are doing better I don't feel like I should be able do more for my kids you know
  • Yeah no way is my daughter doing all that. And I'm perfectly fine with it. She is clearly teething, no teeth visible yet though. She can roll over, but she doesn't just regularly roll over for fun. She reaches for her toys, cries, eats, sleeps, and that's about it. I am in no rush for her to do anything more than what's she's doing. I think society puts too much stress on competition from an early age. If your child is meeting his or her milestones on their own timeline that's still great. I say don't stress it and don't rush it. Just enjoy it, every minute... It goes by way too fast!
    vibarra27Kmshott123
  • They're not over exaggerating I've actually seen it first hand one of my coworkers sons is walking its just he takes a couple steps then falls he hasn't gotten it fully down yet and then the one that was born four days before my son he's already gotten the spoon eating and sippy cups. I'm stay at home mom and with my son all day and it feels like I don't accomplish anything when he just lays on his tummy time mat and screems and then try to bite me even tho he has no teeth. I just feel really crummy all day long knowing that everyone else he's not a stay at home on their kids are doing better I don't feel like I should be able do more for my kids you know

    The more pressure you put on your baby, the less your baby will want to do it. I tried getting DD to walk before 1 and it didnt happen. & on her 1st birthday she started walking on her own. Potty training her the same. The more i pushed the longer it took her to potty train & one day boom she got the hang of it. She didnt get teeth till she was 9 months & never crawled. With my twins I was told they would be doing things a little behind schedule since they were born 6 weeks early. Technically they should be doing what a 3 month old should be doing and are on track with a 4.5 month old but because im not pressuring them. Just take it easy. I tried to rush things with DD & i didnt truly enjoy her as a baby because i was trying to see what she can do next.. & now the 2nd time around im giving my sons time & space to grow. This is a special time. Dont feel rushed to have your baby grow cus it goes by fast. & you cant take it back. Enjoy him this little as much as possible. Keep your had up he'll do things @his own pace when HE knows hes ready. Babies are smarter than you think :)
    Kmshott123
  • My son is 17 weeks and he doesn't roll, can't sit up and isn't reaching for food. He has had amazing neck/head control since he was born. I'm a SAHM too and he does tummy time with me while I work out, does vision "exercises" with me, and reaches for toys but no luck yet for movement haha. He is quite frustrated about it. He does watch me eat but doesn't seem too interested yet. I would say that's typical development. Oh & My son likes to bite my hands too! It comforts him and must feel good.

    Also (I don't recall who mentioned this to me recently but..) I heard juice isn't very good for babies anywho so don't sweat it. Lots of people wait to introduce food.

    The best advice I received so far has been "don't waste the time you have with your kid wishing. We got caught up in wishing they could crawl, walk, talk, and so on. That time goes by so fast. It'll happen anyway, then they grow up." that advice shows me it's normal to worry and I think of it whenever I start to.
    Kmshott123
  • It's a good thing your lo isn't walking. A friend of mine is a physical therapist and she said that babies' pelvises aren't strong enough to walk or to stand on their own until they are closer to that year mark. She's seen parents try to force their kids to walk rather than crawl and she said it's ruining their hip joints. If your baby skips crawling and walks on his own or walks early, great! But don't stress it. Your baby sounds like he is right on schedule.
    Kmshott123
  • I find it very hard to believe that their kids are doing all of this at 4 months. And if they are, they are probably being pushed to do things that their bodies aren't ready for. They could be damaging their skeletal development. Do not push your baby to sit up or bear weight before they take the initiative to do so. Also, solid food, juice, and sippy cups are in no way expected or even advocated for 4 month olds. The recommendation is 6 months, though any of this before 1 isn't really necessary as long as your baby is getting iron from some source. I'm sorry, but don't fall for the trap of thinking that other people know how to parent just because they have kids. Your friends may not be doing things that are in the best interest of their kids if they really are that young. Don't worry about any of them. You have a little baby who needs your interaction, love, and care. He really shouldn't be doing much more than laying around all day, he is still practically a newborn! Take care of their basic needs, help stimulate their development with play time and interaction, and give him lots of affection. That is what he needs right now. You are doing a great job and you don't need any one else's validation.
    jen83mnElleMF728Kmshott123ForeverEverAfter
  • My lo is 20 weeks rolls back to front consistently just this week -it comes with then rolling in their sleep which isn't fun lol since he cannot roll belly to back so he cries and needs to be fixed. All day on my day off I wanted to foster this new trait but it's exhausting fixing him every few minutes. Don't fret your lo will learn things on their own time!
    Kmshott123troopersmom
  • I would think juice has to be a no-no at 4 months. Our doc said prune juice for constipation but that's it. No other juice because it's too sugary, doesn't offer a lot of nutrition and can cause other long term health issues like obesity. And a sippy cup?! No way. My DS is EBF and will be til 6 months, I don't feel behind at all. Your friends sound kinda nuts. I don't get the competition. Sounds like they are just one upping each other and the only loser is the kids. Like the above ladies said, you are doing great. It all comes with time. Enjoy your child now and know that baby led is the right way for most things. Don't pressure them, it's not healthy for anyone. You will know when your LO is ready.
    ElleMF728Kmshott123
  • This is baby #3 for me and I don't know why all of a sudden I'm hearing giving baby juice?? My MIL insisted giving LO juice at like 2mos. Are these people reading the grams of sugar that is in most juice!? I'm good on the juice, thanks. (Except I have heard to give prune juice- watered down- for constipation)
    booksandcleverness81Kmshott123
  • ElleMF728ElleMF728 member
    edited January 2016
    A 4 month old walking sounds like a freaking nightmare....seriously.  I'm desperately hoping this one stays where I put him until at least 7 months and that includes crawling.  Don't envy this mom, feel bad for her.  

    ETA: DS1 has never had juice, he is 2.5.
    dmbfan46835Kmshott123
  • Also, teeth after 6 months are so much easier.  6 months = Motrin and Motrin is 100X better than Tylenol for dealing with tooth pain.  
    Kmshott123shelbydd
  • My four month old doesn't do any of that. You're putting too much pressure on yourself and your baby. Relax momma...I'm sure he's right on track!!!
    Kmshott123kimevs21
  • Also, if you YouTube babies walking at 4 months you will see they are not walking on their own, any of these babies in the videos are being walked by their parents, which is probably what your friend is talking about. The babies are not actually walking, they are being pulled around and they are only moving their feet because babies have an intuitive motor response to brace themselves from falling. It looks like walking but is not, and should not be done this young because of the possible damage to their legs and spine. It can also cause bowleggedness, so please don't attempt to make your baby "walk" like this it is not good for them!
    dmbfan46835Kmshott123kimevs21
  • I just have to chime in on the juice, it's totally inappropriate to give an infant. It's nothing but sugar. My DD is 2.5 and only has juice for special occasions.
    And for teething, yes some babies are early but some are late. DD1 had 9 teeth by age 1 but my grandmom says my mom didn't cut her first til after age 1. No worries.
    Kmshott123shelbydd
  • Thanks ladies it helps knowing y'all are so Comforting to me I don't want it to become a competition but for some reason I just feel like it comes down to it they're always posting pictures and videos of how amazing their child is and I love my son no matter what and I'm happy on the progress he is making!!! :)
    booksandcleverness81mamadeez
  • My daughter is 5 months and she will roll, clap, and dance when I stand her up on my lap. I'm glad she's even doing that. She's nowhere near crawling let alone walking. I just want to get through this teething stage and drooling so she can be less fussy. Also I agree. The babies are walking with assistance and I'm sure they rock back and forth like elvis dance moves during so.
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