2 year old wants to touch my breasts?

chelseaepley · January 2016

My 2 year old daughter has a new found interest in my breasts. DS is breastfed and I don't cover. For some reason, she always asks if she can squeeze them, which I find a little odd. Is this normal? Is it just a phase? I tell her no and she says "brother eats boobies". Maybe its a jealousy thing? Should I punish her for this or just let it roll? She's even went so far as to grab my breast while DS is eating.

sacrazy · January 2016

It sounds like this could be a learning experience for you to explain things to her, she sounds curious. Not sure why that should be punished.

chelseaepley · January 2016

I just don't know how to handle it, thats why i asked. Her dads girlfriend said something to me about her reaching down her shirt and I don't really want her to think its just okay to play with every woman's chest.

chelseaepley · January 2016

Also, by punish, I don't mean spanking. I mean just telling her no and explaining why.

rubirubi89 · January 2016

I have a 5 y/o brother (I know) and the first time he saw me BF he asked me what I was doing and then proceeded to get REALLY close to see what I was doing. I told him I was "feeding the baby milk" and after the longest 2 minutes of my life he walked away. He was BF himself so I think it was more about knowing me as only his sister and now I was doing a "mom thing".

rubirubi89 · January 2016

Maybe you could explain how its food for babies and she's not a baby anymore?

JStill0603 · January 2016

I would definitely not punish but try to explain that that's how mommies feed babies, (maybe) that's how you were fed when you were little, but we only let babies touch/eat this way because once you're a big girl you need to get big girl food? I feel like it may stem from jealousy also... It may also help to give DD a "job" while LO is feeding like holding the burp cloth or something to keep her a little occupied until her attention turns elsewhere.

I feel like I had a similar experience, although not quite the same, with SS shortly after I met him. He was 2.5 and I had just started taking him on little outings by myself, like to the park. Well once he figured out I wasn't going to go away, he was confused and called every grown female "mommy." Every woman at the park was "mommy." Imagine my embarrassment (because naturally when I'm with him everyone assumes I'm his mother) when my child calls another woman mommy. This went on for awhile and we tried to explain to him who his mommy was and always refer to me by my first name (now that I am officially stepmom, he does call me mommy 90% of the time), but I get the whole awkwardness when around other people and trying to look down dads gf's shirt and not wanting DD to do this. I think shared parenting adds a whole other layer of jealousy/questions that is difficult for children to understand. SS is now almost 6 and just this morning asked if he could take his brother to his mom's house, he promised he would bring him back though! LOL

MercyC1130 · January 2016

rubirubi89 said:
I have a 5 y/o brother (I know) and the first time he saw me BF he asked me what I was doing and then proceeded to get REALLY close to see what I was doing. I told him I was "feeding the baby milk" and after the longest 2 minutes of my life he walked away. He was BF himself so I think it was more about knowing me as only his sister and now I was doing a "mom thing".

No judgment, just curiosity, but your brother is 5 and breastfeeding?
Did I read that correctly? I'm in awe at that thought.

Oh dear lord, I was about to post this and thought I'd read over it one more time to see if I read correctly.
BF as in breastfed, not breastFEEDING. Lol.
Right?

I'm confusing myself.

chelseaepley · January 2016

Thank you @rubirubi89 and @JStill0603 for the advice. I will try my best to explain it to her!

rubirubi89 · January 2016

MercyC1130 said:

I have a 5 y/o brother (I know) and the first time he saw me BF he asked me what I was doing and then proceeded to get REALLY close to see what I was doing. I told him I was "feeding the baby milk" and after the longest 2 minutes of my life he walked away. He was BF himself so I think it was more about knowing me as only his sister and now I was doing a "mom thing".
No judgment, just curiosity, but your brother is 5 and breastfeeding? Did I read that correctly? I'm in awe at that thought. Oh dear lord, I was about to post this and thought I'd read over it one more time to see if I read correctly. BF as in breastfed, not breastFEEDING. Lol. Right? I'm confusing myself.

lol yes he WAS BF about 4 years ago. I'm surprised that's the part you found weird, not the fact that I'm 26 and have a 5 year old brother, everyone thinks he's mine when I have him. My mom says he was her last surviving egg lol

MargaretC5 · January 2016

DS is 2 and very curious about me BF the baby also. I just told him the baby's milk comes from mommy and his milk comes from the fridge. He seemed to accept that, but still watches very closely. DS also pretends to BF his toy dog.
He has tried to grab my breast and our day care provider's breasts, we just said no and distracted him with another activity. After a few times he seemed to lose interest.

VexedMommy · January 2016

You could also try feeding your SD a snack or a little treat when you're breastfeeding and explain to her that her little brother is eating his food just like she is eating her food. Maybe get her to giggle and make it a bonding moment about how big people's food tastes good and baby brother's food tastes the same as her finger/hand/leg/other non sexualized body part.

Elyse1384 · January 2016

DS (22 months) is also fascinated by my BFing DS. I use it as a learning opportunity for him and when I explained it to him a few times prior, he now knows what is happening when I get ready to BF DD. He even brings the burp cloth over for me! It is amazing how much they really grasp at such a young age. If you just treat it like a natural act (which it is) then DD will come to think nothing of it. This was particularly important to me with son as I plan to have a more kids so he will see this with other siblings and I want him to understand what boobs are really for - a beautiful act to nourish a baby. Not fun bags as that moron Wendy Williams claims. I wouldn't want DS to objectify women later in life so I see this as building a solid foundation now.

Pontot31 · January 2016

My daughter turns 4 on Friday and is very interested. We talk about how that's how she ate at this age and I showed her pictures of herself as a baby. She also helps get me things when I'm sitting feeding the baby. And likes to remind me to clip up my nursing tank and try to help with that.
I also pumped and asked if she wanted to try some. She drank about 2 ounces. She asked one more time to try some and I gave her another 2 ounces.
I don't want it to be a taboo thing so I try to include her and let her ask questions.

Just explain that only women with little babies have milk and it's not appropriate to touch anyone's boobs at any time but if they have questions they can ask and you will answer.

chelseaepley · January 2016

Thanks everyone! I explained to her that her milk is in the fridge and now when I feed the baby, she wants her milk. Well for today a least, tomorrow shell probably forget we even had the conversation!

taykerslake · January 2016

If you punish her for it she will associate boobs and breastfeeding as a bad thing. The stigma around breastfeeding needs to be addressed at a young age. Like PP have said give her a job, tell her exactly what you're doing and that it is for babies. She is curious. She doesn't understand sexuality. It's exactly like if she were to touch your hand, or touch the bottle if you were bottle feeding. It's not a bad thing to touch your boobs. Yes it is uncomfortable if she does it to others but instead of telling her no don't touch other people's boobs you should teach her not to touch any part of somebody without permission.

Squirtgun · January 2016

VexedMommy said:
You could also try feeding your SD a snack or a little treat when you're breastfeeding and explain to her that her little brother is eating his food just like she is eating her food. Maybe get her to giggle and make it a bonding moment about how big people's food tastes good and baby brother's food tastes the same as her finger/hand/leg/other non sexualized body part.

This is a great idea unless your SD (like my daughter) feels sorry for baby and tries to give them some big people food. Be sure to emphasize that baby can't have big people food yet, or it will make them sick.

(I may or may not have had to swipe some broccoli out of Ruth's mouth after her big sister felt sorry for her and tried to share...)

JStill0603 · January 2016

Squirtgun said:

VexedMommy said:
You could also try feeding your SD a snack or a little treat when you're breastfeeding and explain to her that her little brother is eating his food just like she is eating her food. Maybe get her to giggle and make it a bonding moment about how big people's food tastes good and baby brother's food tastes the same as her finger/hand/leg/other non sexualized body part.
This is a great idea unless your SD (like my daughter) feels sorry for baby and tries to give them some big people food. Be sure to emphasize that baby can't have big people food yet, or it will make them sick.

(I may or may not have had to swipe some broccoli out of Ruth's mouth after her big sister felt sorry for her and tried to share...)

LOL! SS is obsessed with LO eating applesauce and asks everyday when he can give him some! (Side note: SS never had and will not eat applesauce himself!)

NovemberSno · January 2016

I covered in front of my girls at first. They were 7 and 5 but then I figured why am I covering breast feeding is natural and they need to know it's normal and not something to be ashamed of so I stopped covering. Then they got curious and wanted to watch me latch her. Lol. So I was like sure whatever. They were really impressed lol. Then my little one was watching me feed her one time and asked if she could touch them. I let her for a second Just in the top while LO was feeding. Since then, they have both lost interest completely and see it as completely normal. It is just curiosity. And your LO is so small. I'd say just let her she's a baby still. Then she'll realize it's fine and be bored soon after. Moving along with something more interesting. Many women are still feeding them at 2 years old.

NovemberSno · January 2016

NovemberSno said:
I covered in front of my girls at first. They were 7 and 5 but then I figured why am I covering breast feeding is natural and they need to know it's normal and not something to be ashamed of so I stopped covering. Then they got curious and wanted to watch me latch her. Lol. So I was like sure whatever. They were really impressed lol. Then my little one was watching me feed her one time and asked if she could touch them. I let her for a second Just in the top while LO was feeding. Since then, they have both lost interest completely and see it as completely normal. It is just curiosity. And your LO is so small. I'd say just let her she's a baby still. Then she'll realize it's fine and be bored soon after. Moving along with something more interesting. Many women are still feeding them at 2 years old.

Also, just wanted to add, I explained to them what breast were for because they had so many questions as to why boys don't have them and why they don't have them etc etc. And compared my breast and feeding LO to other animals. (My girls are extremely into natgeo and stuff) I didn't BF either of them so I think thier interest was high to be a little older. I hope that they learn from this and understand breast are for nourishing your children not to be objectified. Plus, there was nothing more awkward than the conversation we had about where the baby comes out when I was pregnant. But when I told them the truth, I acted very normal and now it's normal to them and they don't still think it shoots from your belly button. Lol. Obviously they understand that these topics are only between mommy and them and we don't tell other children or talk about this kind of stuff with anyone except mommy. That's important too.

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