Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
jread94
member
Re: Letting people know labour has started
Phone calls, as they are distracting and harder to ignore. DHs side probably wont get any info until after baby is born, partly becuase they are so scattered (his parents divorced, all siblings in different cities etc etc) and also becuase they arent good at respecting boundries like my side is. During all of my sisters labors, my mum was the only one who asked for updates, and we would all just periodicly txt her and ask for news. And we never would have dreamed of just 'turning up' to the hospital without an invite DHs family is the opposite of that unfortunately. I would just state your boundaries, maybe make it clear that if you get too many phone calls you will turn off your phone? Family can be complicated but im sure there is a way you can meet in the middle with DH to keep you both happy, good luck!
This time, we will be letting my mom know when labor starts because she is driving out to take care of DD while we are in the hospital and it takes about 6 hours for her to get here!
TTC #2: Oct 2017, BFP 12/19/17, CP 12/22/17
BFP 2/20/18 - EDD 10/31/2018
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
As for friends I'll let my best friend know since she's a nurse in the hospital I will be giving birth in (used to be in the birth Center but now in the NiCU). Everyone else will find out probably once we go home-I'm
not one for visitors and everyone knows that.
When I was pregnant with my first I called my mom after I was admitted because she had a 5 hour drive, and was coming out to help with household chores and with the baby. We did invite her to the hospital while I was in labor. DH needed a break for food, and I was napping after my epidural. She waited in the waiting room while I was pushing and any time I was checked.
Close friends will likely get a text and photo after delivery once we've had a chance to bond and settle down.
I'm sure my husband will update other family and friends via Facebook as time allows.
My dad, FIL, and siblings will be called once I'm actively pushing so they can head to the hospital, and they'll get to come in as soon as he's here. Then once I've been cleaned up and our families have met baby B, it'll be a free for all.
In the end I had fetal distress and had an emergency c section. I'm glad we didn't let anyone know otherwise there would have been a lot of family anxiety in the 2 hours of fetal monitoring before they did a section. I didn't even get a 2nd application of the cervadil but I was quite ovedue, so my scenario wasn't too abnormal. I'm sure yours will be great but waiting to tell people can cause a lot less stress all around.
Everyone we called lives at least an 8 hour drive away so we figured we'd still get alone time with the baby before anyone arrived. I was 6cm when we called, and DHs parents arrived about 2 hours after the birth. Everyone else waited until we were home to come visit.
I was SUPER annoyed at my mom though...she called like 4 times to check in. I love her and I know she was excited but I didn't want to deal with that. My dad called once from an international vacation to check in. We texted him otherwise.
I'm sure next time will be different as someone, probably my in laws, will be in town early to watch DD while we're at the hospital. But it went pretty well.