Anxiety about baby

Helen1389 · January 2016

Hi everyone!
I'm currently 34 weeks pregnant. While my SO and I are super excited about our daughter, I'm slightly nervous. Often I ask myself, can I do this? Am I ready for this? I'm too young (I'm 27)/not old enough. I've actually never taken care of a baby before and I really don't want to mess up. I'm trying to stay calm and hoping that my natural mothering instincts will take over.
Anyway, am I the only person in the world who's feeling like this?

thisusername · January 2016

Nope! FTM and the jitters are normal. I usually find myself questioning if I'll be able to handle
The changes it means for our future. I love my relationship with DH right now and I'm so afraid of negative changes. I know I will need him with me for her entire life and it makes me a little nervous to think we may fight more and something may ruin us. Then I think about being a single mom and how hard that would be.. It never ends!! Feeling worried is good in a way though, because it means you care and you're deeply rooted with love for baby already. Just wanting to do best by them.

Mamacat316 · January 2016

I had all these feelings when I was pregnant with my first - I was 30, had never been a baby person, and we were moving to a different country during my third trimester. I think the worst part was just not being able to imagine what life with a baby would be like...and all these dumb mommy blogs and books are like, "You'll never get to shower! Say goodbye to your friends forever! Get used to never sleeping!"

In my experience, you just get on with it and find your rhythm. YOU WILL BE FINE. You were biologically designed to have offspring, and you will instinctually know what to do. Plus, you'll love the crap out of your kid. Whether or not your pregnancy was planned, everything happens when and how it's supposed to.

Liz726 · January 2016

I'm a nervous wreck too. I'm a generally anxious person, and I tend to overthink things - I'm just scared I'm going to have this baby and find out I hate being a mother. On the other hand, I can't wait to meet him and cover his tiny little face with kisses. I think - I hope anyway - that it's normal to feel conflicted and scared. It's a huge change, and change is tough. I resist change...I really dig my heels in sometimes. But in my experience, things are almost never as bad as I expect them to be (and usually, in reality, they're actually way better...especially when you take one of these scary/exciting steps in life).

suteki325 · January 2016

Whenever people ask me how I'm feeling now that LO is so close to making his debut, I always answer "Equal parts excited beyond belief and scared as hell." Like PPs here, I'm by nature a highly anxious person and I've always hated change in my life. I'm the type of person who would get dry heaves the day of starting a new job, because I was so nervous! I like to know what to expect, when to expect it, and how it's going to go - and with being a FTM, these are completely uncharted waters for me! I'm scared that my relationship with my DH will change, that my relationship with my friends will change, even worried about how my dog will react to having a baby in the house. But it helps so much to hear other moms talk about how they felt the exact same way, and how it all worked out for them. I think the most important thing to remember is just to take it all one day at a time. And if I ever start to feel overwhelmed, or depressed (I'm very worried about getting PPD) I know that my mom is only a phone call away, and that as much as she may drive me up the wall sometimes, she would be willing to come over and watch the baby while I shower, or take a nap, or do anything else I might need to get done.

Ktjennks · January 2016

I'm 27 too and also 34 weeks (FTM)! While 27 is still young I don't think it's too young to have a baby so don't feel that way! Many people have kids sooner than that and they do perfectly fine. I think 27 is actually a great age. However, I'm right in there with you. I don't feel grown up yet. I think I'd feel more grown up had I finished school. Luckily we both have pretty good jobs I wouldn't really call mine a career though. I'm more worried about being able to afford everything. I think once your child arrives mommy mode will kick in and while you might second guess yourself you'll know what to do. Just take it day by day and you'll do amazing.

Vkrosa · January 2016

I am a TTM and I am also very nervous. I think we all feel this way especially when it comes to the very end.

srecupido · January 2016

@Helen1389 I think others have already made it clear, but no, you are certainly not the only person to feel this way

it seems like a pretty natural feeling and something we are all a bit anxious about as February creeps closer! We will make mistakes and maybe feel like a complete failure every once in a while but just by asking the question you are already showing how much love you have for your LO and what an awesome mom you will be. Don't beat yourself up and don't be afraid to ask for help, you will be great!!

LadyDarlene · January 2016

I think it's completely normal. I'm a FTM, and I'm 20 (I'll be 21 when I have my baby.) . I think you know when you're ready. Financially my husband and I are stable, we have a place, careers and our life on a path. My entire life I planned everything out - how to get a good job, how to get a reliable car, getting a nice place, and finding a good husband - and I did all of that and the ending to it was to have a child, that was what I always wanted and everything went according to plan - but having our baby has proven to be.. less than easy. This is what I always wanted, and I have no regrets - but as things get more real I get more and more nervous. The pain, the unknown just everything has me feeling anxious. I'm excited though, and know that it's just nerves. I'm currently 35 weeks pregnant and my induction is scheduled for Feb 11th.

thisusername · January 2016

LadyDarlene said:
I think it's completely normal. I'm a FTM, and I'm 20 (I'll be 21 when I have my baby.) . I think you know when you're ready. Financially my husband and I are stable, we have a place, careers and our life on a path. My entire life I planned everything out - how to get a good job, how to get a reliable car, getting a nice place, and finding a good husband - and I did all of that and the ending to it was to have a child, that was what I always wanted and everything went according to plan - but having our baby has proven to be.. less than easy. This is what I always wanted, and I have no regrets - but as things get more real I get more and more nervous. The pain, the unknown just everything has me feeling anxious. I'm excited though, and know that it's just nerves. I'm currently 35 weeks pregnant and my induction is scheduled for Feb 11th.

Happy early birthday!!
My husband and I are the same way, but I'll still be 20 when I deliver and our little sunshine wasn't planned. My mom had her first at this age too, and she always tells me "having them young means you get more years with them than others!" So at least we can enjoy that!
I hope it gets a little easier.. Though it doesn't seem like pregnancy ever does!

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