Let's talk about sex...

violetigerlily · January 2016

Hey everyone. I recently got back from my six week appt and got the green light for sex and exercise. Unfortunately, after we got home and went through a few false starts (i.e. the baby woke up right as we were about to do the deed) we finally tried to have sex but stopped due to my pain. I know lubrication is key to pp sex but it still hurt more than I expected--enough that there was no way I was going to enjoy it so--much to DH's dismay--we stopped. Anyone have advice or want to share how pp sex has been working out? I'm not sure if it's better to keep trying every few days, just go for it through the pain, if foreplay only for a while helps, or completely hold off for a week or so to see if it gets better. What did you do?

(Sorry if this topic has been addressed--I scanned the first two pages and when I searched I only saw posts from other month boards)

bellie1223 · January 2016

We've just been going really slow, lots of foreplay and lots of lube. First time did not feel great, I'm not sure we even followed through, but each subsequent time has gotten better, I'm 10 weeks pp and had no tears or stitches. I'm definitely surprised how long it's taking to heal!! My advice is to stick with it and make sure you're communicating with your partner, that's been key for us.

ShianeNicole · January 2016

Sex has been easy and enjoyable for the most part for DH and I. A little pain when we first start but it gets better. I had a c section though so I'm not sure if that matters or not.

TallyKyle · January 2016

I am 8 weeks pp and it still hurts. I'm making sure I use my vibrator and communicating with hubby. If it hurts too much, we find other ways to get there.

Lolo427 · January 2016

I'm wondering what the other C-section moms are experiencing on here. I'm still very very aware of my incision and still feel 'disconnected' I guess (no better way to describe it). Luckily DD has been a monster so we haven't really felt in the mood and DH is very understanding and not pushy at all. Totally afraid to try though.

threatlevelmidnight · January 2016

I'm too afraid to even try...

gipfish · January 2016

If you can figure out what is causing your pain, you can work around it. I have three kinds of pain going on. 1. Pain when aroused. It subsides after enough foreplay. 2. Pain from being dry. That is easily addressed with lots of lube. 3. Pain from pressure on my perineum. If I can control the angle, that one lessens a lot. It helps to be on top.

It gets gradually better every time. The key is communication. Hope that helps.

rachswi · January 2016

It hurts still for me (we've only done it 3 times because I got my period then strep). Lube has helped and it's gotten better each time. Currently since him being inside me doesn't really feel good for me (so no way I'm climaxing), we usually extend foreplay long enough for me to get mine (and that usually helps with his entry anyway). We still go slow too

kwaldy · January 2016

I got the green light too, but got my period the next day, so we haven't quite attempted yet. I think I'm moreso just scared to try... lol.

chelseaepley · January 2016

We've been having sex since 2 weeks PP, with green light from ob of course and all bleeding had stopped. It gets Better, I promise. The first time I felt like I was losing my virginity again, which DH enjoyed! But with lots of lube, after a few minutes everything felt normal.

ETA: I had a RCS so I may be different. Once I felt okay, we did. Just carefully and had to find a good position.

rubirubi89 · January 2016

I'm 9 wks PP and after trying once every week the last three weeks, this last time was the first time it didn't hurt. yay! I knew my stitches healed already but its still scary. I mean how soon can you get over having your vagina stitched back into shape?

angelinthepit23 · January 2016

7 weeks PP today and we did the deed Sunday. We used lube but it didn't hurt, just felt strange at first. Probably just from not doing it for so long. I only had a labial tear though so maybe that's why. Sadly got my period right after so thanks Mother Nature for that. On the plus side DH now has a week to get my nookie to-do list done. I'm using that for as long as I can. He doesn't need to know I found PP sex to be enjoyable from the start!

helsbels222 · January 2016

Lolo427 said:
I'm wondering what the other C-section moms are experiencing on here. I'm still very very aware of my incision and still feel 'disconnected' I guess (no better way to describe it). Luckily DD has been a monster so we haven't really felt in the mood and DH is very understanding and not pushy at all. Totally afraid to try though.

7 weeks pp after RCS and I feel the same. We can't even finish watching a movie together, let alone have sex!

hlz128 · January 2016

I'm 8wks pp and DH and I have only tried once so far. And it was painful. Mostly because we didn't use lubricant. I've been hesitant to try it again

DogLoverX3 · January 2016

I'm 9 weeks pp with a grade 4 tear. It has been painful to even attempt to get started where the stitches were-like it won't stretch to accommodate (sorry if TMI). So we can't even really try. But we've made 3 failed attempts and just move on to other "activities" lol! I was told by OB that lube and stretching of that area is key? Still trying

dramaphile · January 2016

We did it at 6 weeks pp with a ton of lube, and it was ok. I think I need to do more kegels, I couldn't feel him as much as before. I got sore after a while, I have a tiny spot of granular tissue where a stitch was. It was still nice to have that closeness again.

ColoradoHiker · January 2016

We tried last night (8w PP). I had an episiotomy, and wasn't quite healed at 7w follow up appt, midwife recommended waiting an extra week or so. It was a bit uncomfortable, but not bad with lots of lube and foreplay. I only had one spot that was sore, the area that had only just healed. Not as bad as I thought it would be, overall.

smnewby · January 2016

Took 10 weeks but sex is finally pain free! Now however the O has continued to elude me! Positions that worked before no longer do! Its like my early 20s all over again!

ASalton1 · January 2016

Honestly have DH give you the big O first before you even try intercourse. It'll relax you and lube everything up enough to make intercourse enjoyable. Trying with out that hurts too much.

flas · January 2016

ASalton1 said:
Honestly have DH give you the big O first before you even try intercourse. It'll relax you and lube everything up enough to make intercourse enjoyable. Trying with out that hurts too much.

I honestly can't remember if this is accurate but I had always been informed that having an orgasm causes the cervix to shorten up or something so it could actually cause more pain! I say try it both ways and see which one you like better!

threatlevelmidnight · January 2016

Weird question, but do your boobs leak or anything during sex? Should I keep my bra on or something? Sorry don't know who else to ask! Haha

mcdoug211 · January 2016

@alyssaleighw mine do and I stopped pumping almost 2 weeks ago lol I don't bc he doesn't mind but if your guy does and your more comfortable then leave it on!

Also anyone else notice a small firm bump by episiotomy site? Mine just said something about it tonight and idk if it's just scar tissue or something worse/left over undissolved stitching

Pontot31 · January 2016

alyssaleighw said:
Weird question, but do your boobs leak or anything during sex? Should I keep my bra on or something? Sorry don't know who else to ask! Haha

Yes they can. My midwife told me to be sure to feed the baby before hand because milk can spray out!
But I leak so much I just keep on a bra with breast pads.

rachswi · January 2016

I wear my bra during sex to avoid the leakage. Also helps remind DH to leave the boobs alone since they're not quite as fun as they used to be

rubirubi89 · January 2016

If I leave my bra off and my boobs leak, then "BABY BABY MILK BABY BABY MILK" is all I can think off. So yes, I do leave it on. Only exception is right after I've pumped, Then not a damn thing is coming out.

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