I searched! Doulas have been briefly mentioned in a few other threads, but nothing in depth. I was told second trimester is the time to hire a doula and develop a relationship. Has anyone been through the process of hiring a doula (basically one you didn't know beforehand)? There is a doula meet and greet DH and I are going to Friday and I was wondering if anyone has done this before and if so how did you choose someone? It sounds awkward and I'm not sure what we're really looking for in a doula. What questions should we ask the doulas (yes I've googled, but I'd like to know what really mattered to real women during/pre/post delivery)? How can you tell if it's a good fit? Did any of your husbands or partners have opinions about the doula? What were your expectations of your doula and did they meet those expectations? Any and all experiences and advice greatly appreciated!
Re: Hiring a Doula
At first H was apprehensive about a doula but the fact that I don't have a support person I'm comfortable with that has been through this before was my biggest defense. Plus, we had a wedding coordinator and I asked him why we wouldn't have someone else supporting the second biggest moment of our life together. After watching the business of being born it further solidifies the fact I do not want to be induced, and I will need all the help I can get!
My suggestion would be that if you're on the fence about what you want for a birth plan, make those decisions first, before engaging a doula. Make sure you have the important decisions made between you and your husband/partner and then find a doula that aligns with your vision/goals. You would not want to work with a doula that pressures you one way or the other about your birth experience.
If you are ready to go and have decided you definitely want a doula, you can always ask to speak to previous clients. Many clients are willing to provide a reference and getting some "reviews" will help inform your decision greatly, especially if you have some shared experiences with one of your prospective doula's clients.
Quoting to add:
When I was in nursing school they had a doula program where you learned how to be a doula while going to school. If I recall you weren't allowed to charge while in the program, may want to call up some nursing schools and see if they also have programs ? Ours was called birthing companions I think?
@maddmama Almost all the doula's I have spoken with have very flexible payment plans if you need to utilize them. It would be worth asking about before ruling them out of the budget.
@noelietrex This is the list of questions I have asked all of my potential doulas. Maybe you'll find some useful?
What is your training? Are you certified? If so, by what organization? And what was required in order to receive this certification?
How many births have you attended? Are you familiar with my doctor/midwife/hospital/birth center?
Do you get along/know my caregiver?
When would you join me during labor?
Which labor coping techniques do you think tend to be the most helpful?
How would you work with and involve my partner?
How do you feel about the use of pain medication during labor?
Why did you become a doula?
Tell us about some of your birthing experiences.
What's your fee? (Doulas' fees range from about $300 to $1,000.)
What does your fee cover? How many visits or hours?
What's your refund policy?
Do you have anyone else due near the time I'm due?
Do you have a backup arrangement with another doula or group of doulas in case you're not free when I go into labor? Can I meet them?
Can I talk to a few of your recent clients?
After the interview:
Do I feel comfortable around this person?
Is she warm, enthusiastic, and knowledgeable?
Does she communicate and listen well?
Will she support my choices or does she have her own agenda?
We found a really good doula with who we connected really well, but it appeared she wasn't experienced with postpartum care so we looked for another one. Our requirements made it quite expensive (more than 1000 usd) but I am very happy with our decision and feel confident. We had our birthing class last weekend and it was insightful and reassuring for both me and DH. There were many doula's in training present, who will assist you for more like ~500 usd and I also think they would be a great choice for a birth if you have a smaller budget.
I think a good doula is respectful of your choices and is focused on comforting you (and your partner), reassuring you, and in some cases: voicing your preferences. When I read the scientific literature it is very clear to me that women with doulas (even when they are randomly assigned, so compared to a control-group) undergo less interventions and less c-sections. Why is not really clear. But my guess is that it is due to her calming, reassuring presence, the techniques of moving you around, which causes less stress and panic and pain and which makes labour progress better. I wish you all the best!
This article appeared a few days ago https://www.npr.org/sections/health-shots/2016/01/15/463223250/doula-support-for-pregnant-women-could-improve-care-reduce-costs
ETA: I forgot no 4...