SIDS....how to get past the fear?

DogLoverX3 · January 2016

I'm really struggling with the thought of SIDS. I'm still off my OCD meds, so I understand that that is part of it. But I'm wondering, for those STM, how you delt with/and moved past those fears?

rachswi · January 2016

Not a STM but I've worried less about SIDS since I found out only about 40 in 100,000 live births die of SIDS. Knowing the statistics is comforting for me.

MargaretC5 · January 2016

Part of being a parent is worrying about your kids. It is completely normal to worry about SIDS. If you following the suggestions to prevent SIDS (back to sleep and no soft bedding are the two biggest ones, but Google can tell you all of them) and have discussed your concerns with your pedi there is not much else you can do.
When I find myself worrying about things beyond my control, I try to change what I am doing to distract myself. If I am watching TV and finding myself worrying, I may go do a load of dishes or take a shower. I find the change in activity help me reset my thinking.
If your worrying is disrupting your day to day life or preventing you from sleeping I would l talk to a professional about it.

DogLoverX3 · January 2016

Thanks. I figured I'd just have to try to move past it. I'm feeling a little better now that we are out of the rock n play-GERD and so pedi recommended it-laying flat on her back caused choking, puking, screaming, etc.! We are in the crib with a crib wedge now, but still worrying. Can't wait till we can do flat on the back-that'll probably ease my thoughts a little more! Anyway, thank you for your thoughts!

CocoR04 · January 2016

The way I got past the anxiety (which was severe 3 years ago when I had DS) was get him a Snuza breathing monitor. That way, if he were in trouble, I'd know when it was happening. Breathing monitors don't prevent SIDS, but having his breathing and movement monitored gave me the release I needed to actually go to sleep. We bought the owlet monitor for DD and it's done the same with relieving anxiety. Also, like a PP suggested, learning about stats and facts helped me too.

wimamaof2 · January 2016

CocoR04 said:
The way I got past the anxiety (which was severe 3 years ago when I had DS) was get him a Snuza breathing monitor. That way, if he were in trouble, I'd know when it was happening. Breathing monitors don't prevent SIDS, but having his breathing and movement monitored gave me the release I needed to actually go to sleep. We bought the owlet monitor for DD and it's done the same with relieving anxiety. Also, like a PP suggested, learning about stats and facts helped me too.

We also got the Snuza for LO. It has brought so much peace of mind to us. We got it through Amazon.com and it has great reviews.

LydianG · January 2016

For me i just accept that its either going to happen or its not. All i can do is the recommended safety things but beyond that theres nothing i can do. If you spend time and energy worring about the worst case scenario and it happens then all you've done is lived it twice.

DogLoverX3 · January 2016

LydianG said:
For me i just accept that its either going to happen or its not. All i can do is the recommended safety things but beyond that theres nothing i can do. If you spend time and energy worring about the worst case scenario and it happens then all you've done is lived it twice.

Wow-that's perfectly put. Thanks.

sadyy131 · January 2016

I think I stopped being so worried when I realized that any of us can die at any minute, SIDS or not. We can do everything we can to protect our LOs from SIDS but life is full of the unexpected and we can't protect them forever. That may cause more anxiety than ease, and I totally feel you because I was worried sick for weeks, but sadly life leaves us with little control.

Ceridwen77 · January 2016

I just follow all of the prevention guidelines - sleeping on back on a firm surface, sleeping in our room, breastfeeding, making sure baby is not dressed too warmly, pacifier at bedtime when possible, etc.

chein1 · January 2016

If it's going to happen, it's going to happen. That's my take on anything in life really. I'm always prepared for the worst in the back of my mind, but I don't let it consume me. I just know how extremely lucky I am to have my health and my girls' health, but I'm also aware that at any point in time that could change without warning.

wulfpackgirl · January 2016

I worry a lot about it too. Always checking is he breathing. We have a Snuza too. That gives me a big peace of mind at night. Love the Snuza....it's worth every penny.

dramaphile · January 2016

I have friends who get under-mattress baby breathing sensors, or those sensors you attach to the baby, and I feel like it just feeds the paranoia for some people. You do what you can to prevent, and ultimately there's a part that's beyond your control. I'm strict about where she sleeps and no blankets or stuffed animals or bumpers etc, but I just can't live being anxious every time she goes to sleep.

Pontot31 · January 2016

dramaphile said:
I have friends who get under-mattress baby breathing sensors, or those sensors you attach to the baby, and I feel like it just feeds the paranoia for some people. You do what you can to prevent, and ultimately there's a part that's beyond your control. I'm strict about where she sleeps and no blankets or stuffed animals or bumpers etc, but I just can't live being anxious every time she goes to sleep.

Exactly this. I feel like they feed into insecurities. And many nicu nurses and doctors will tell you they don't recommend them.

MargaretC5 · January 2016

Pontot31 said:

dramaphile said:
I have friends who get under-mattress baby breathing sensors, or those sensors you attach to the baby, and I feel like it just feeds the paranoia for some people. You do what you can to prevent, and ultimately there's a part that's beyond your control. I'm strict about where she sleeps and no blankets or stuffed animals or bumpers etc, but I just can't live being anxious every time she goes to sleep.
Exactly this. I feel like they feed into insecurities. And many nicu nurses and doctors will tell you they don't recommend them.

Our daughter was in the nicu and the pedi ward already, both drs said not to get the home sensors (I never asked, i think they tell all parents). There are trained professionals that watch the monitors in the hospital. At home the sensors could just feed into the fear something is wrong or they could lead to a false sense of security.

CocoR04 · January 2016

MargaretC5 said:

Pontot31 said:

dramaphile said:
I have friends who get under-mattress baby breathing sensors, or those sensors you attach to the baby, and I feel like it just feeds the paranoia for some people. You do what you can to prevent, and ultimately there's a part that's beyond your control. I'm strict about where she sleeps and no blankets or stuffed animals or bumpers etc, but I just can't live being anxious every time she goes to sleep.
Exactly this. I feel like they feed into insecurities. And many nicu nurses and doctors will tell you they don't recommend them.
Our daughter was in the nicu and the pedi ward already, both drs said not to get the home sensors (I never asked, i think they tell all parents). There are trained professionals that watch the monitors in the hospital. At home the sensors could just feed into the fear something is wrong or they could lead to a false sense of security.

I've never had a false alarm with our owlet breathing monitor, but I did have a real alarm with my son when he was around 4 months old. He stopped breathing in his sleep, long enough for the Snuza monitor to go off, and when I shook him he started breathing again. I called my doctor the next morning and things were fine with him physically, but I never regretted using the monitor for one minute.

The breathing monitors don't claim to prevent SIDS, but knowing something is monitoring my child's breathing at night has let me sleep 100% more soundly than I would without one. No paranoia here!

Bootsie81 · January 2016

When my son was released from the NICU 5 years ago his neonatal dr actually strongly suggested we get an Angelcare movement monitor. Things may have changed in the last 5 years but I never regretted having one - even after several false alarms. I was worried about everything and it did help put my mind at ease a little bit. I haven't been quite so paranoid with #2 and #3 but I've used it for both of them as well.

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