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August 2016 Moms
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A little advice

tiebreaker89tiebreaker89 member
in August 2016 Moms
I need a little advice on what I should do about work. I work in a group home for adults with developmental disabilities. Some of these adults have aggressive and sometime physical behaviors. DH wants me to tell my boss soon so that accommodations can be made to ensure my safety at work. I on the other hand don't want to tell her yet because that would remove me from one of my homes.

I'm looking for outside opinion on what I should do. Thank you in advance.
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Re: A little advice

  • kiwico14kiwico14 member
    If there's a real chance that remaining in one of the homes could result in harm to you and your baby, it makes sense to me that you may need to adjust. That being said, I totally understand not wanting to be pulled from that role, especially when routines and relationships are so important to help those you care for.

    Would it be possible for you to tell your boss but suggest some sort of schedule that allows you to reduce your time at that home over the next days or weeks rather than leaving abruptly?
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  • jacmkelleyjacmkelley member
    I would feel how you feel, and DH would feel the same as yours.
    I think I would know that if I need to be concerned about my safety and the baby's I would need to make the call and let my boss know.
    But I would also hate to leave the people I work with. If your passion is to care and help these people I can understand 100% why it's hard. All in the same breath, if something were to happen would it be worth it to you?

    I think that's a call you've got to think about. Eventually everyone will know anyway. And you will have to leave, so maybe on your terms is better than your boss's.

    I feel for you! I hope you can figure out what is best. Hugs and hope with whatever you decide you have peace in your decision!
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  • happyhorsehappyhorse member
    edited January 2016
    I'll jump in. I think it is mostly up to you, more so than him, but he gets his opinion heard. I don't have the same situation but I'm waiting to 12 weeks at least to tell work because I don't want to get mommy tracked during project season. I felt like I was put on the mommy track after baby 1.
    Sounds like you might be saying you've got concerns about being mommy tracked if you ask for accommodations. Technically, they aren't supposed to discriminate but it does happen. That's the reality.

    Anyway, if I were in your shoes I'd ask myself how often a dangerous situation comes up and how I'd feel if one did. Then I'd weigh that against how likely I am to get marginalized professionally and how I'd feel if I were. For me, personally, the right thing is to protect my career but I don't have to consider physical danger in my career.


    Is that what you're asking?
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  • tiebreaker89tiebreaker89 member
    Thank you all for your opinions. I am very concerned about baby's safety but I'm not ready for all of my individuals and coworkers to know that I'm pregnant. I'm only 6 weeks.
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