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TTC After a Loss
XoXomomma
member
Nervous to Try Again...
XoXomomma
member
hello all,
I MC early October and now I'm heisting about trying again. I don't want to go through the pain again, but I'd of course love to have another baby. My son is 3, I had a perfect pregnancy with him. I'm 30. Please share your experiences
I MC early October and now I'm heisting about trying again. I don't want to go through the pain again, but I'd of course love to have another baby. My son is 3, I had a perfect pregnancy with him. I'm 30. Please share your experiences
Re: Nervous to Try Again...
I'm in the same situation as you; we found out we'd lost our bubs on 24th Oct 2015. I have a son who is nearly 6 and I am nearly 34. I feel like I have so many reasons to be terrified. I'm desperate to cry but I can't anymore, is that strange? I think we need to be brave and have hope. Blessings to you and your family and a happy new year. Let's hope 2016 brings more joy for us.
Just to tell you how I felt - when it first happened, I was completely terrified. A part of me never wanted to try again and another part wanted nothing more. Somehow this thought stream made me feel better about it -, I thought about a recent conversation that my friend and I had about a lady who accidentally ran over a pedestrian. My friend told me that the lady never wanted to drive again but her husband literally made her drive that same day so her fears wouldn't build up too much and prevent her from driving.
Even though that all sounds cruel, The lady said she was so glad her husband did that, because if not, she probably would have never driven again and thus would have missed out on a lot. (Haven't we all felt that to a degree, That feeling of "getting back on that horse" after a breakup, bad job, car wreck, sports injury, etc) For some reason, I related that convo to trying again. I decided this situation was the same for me and I had to just make myself do it, despite the fears, so I wouldn't miss out on joy in the future.
Also talking to my mom helped. She experienced infertility and two MCs after me and then gave up trying forever. She told me that her biggest regret is not trying again. I told her I was scared of it happening again and that pregnancy sucks too bad to not get a healthy baby out of it at the end. She told me that even if it happens again and again (which is highly unlikely), that is just one step closer to doctors figuring out what the problem is. That is just all part of the journey so that I can get a healthy baby out of it at the end. This made me feel a lot better about trying again, and now I can't wait. We will get back to it as soon as I get medical clearance, probably after AF arrives later this week.
@XoXomomma I have had two losses now and I have no children yet. My last loss took place in mid October, and I was terrified to try again. But I eventually realized that the child I would get in the end would be worth all this pain. Even though you already have one child, if you want another, use your son as inspiration. No two pregnancies are alike, but each is magical in its own way and creates a beautiful and unique human being. Good luck in your TTC journey and I hope you have the support you need, and you get your healthy baby in 2016!