April 2016 Moms
JulienneNicole
member
Fear/ Anxiety
JulienneNicole
member
I am finding myself more afraid of loss now that I am almost to the 3rd trimester than I was in the 1st. I am not sure if it started when my best friends lost their baby a few weeks ago. But it is now becoming a daily thing.
I went over to the loss board to see if I could get some suggestions from posts about the best way of interacting with my friend because we are hanging out on Thursday. It ended up making me even more afraid.
Up until now I have been so blessed with all healthy appointments and That has given me peace. Then to read about moms carrying full term healthy and then the LO is gone. I am trying really hard and I tell myself to repeat "I am pregnant today." But it's getting to the point that it doesn't help.
DH has been amazing and listens and holds me and tells me that no matter what this is our little girl and if something does happen it is out of my control. Usually I have very little anxiety about anything and that tends to help. Now it just makes me worried I will lose these precious moments because I am worried over nothing. Or if I do lose her the. I wasted my time with her when I could have just been enjoying her kicks and rolls.
Right now I am standing in the bathroom at work crying because I feel so ungrateful. I have a beautiful life in me and from the ultrasounds we see she has my nose. I can't imagine not having her.
I plan on talking to my doctor at my appointment next Friday. But does anyone else feel like this ever? How do you handle it. Any STMs feel like this in their first pregnancy?
I am usually the most positive person ever. I always can find the good in the bad and I am almost never worried because things that are out of my control can't be changed, but I can position myself the best way possible with what is in my control. I just can't do that right now
I went over to the loss board to see if I could get some suggestions from posts about the best way of interacting with my friend because we are hanging out on Thursday. It ended up making me even more afraid.
Up until now I have been so blessed with all healthy appointments and That has given me peace. Then to read about moms carrying full term healthy and then the LO is gone. I am trying really hard and I tell myself to repeat "I am pregnant today." But it's getting to the point that it doesn't help.
DH has been amazing and listens and holds me and tells me that no matter what this is our little girl and if something does happen it is out of my control. Usually I have very little anxiety about anything and that tends to help. Now it just makes me worried I will lose these precious moments because I am worried over nothing. Or if I do lose her the. I wasted my time with her when I could have just been enjoying her kicks and rolls.
Right now I am standing in the bathroom at work crying because I feel so ungrateful. I have a beautiful life in me and from the ultrasounds we see she has my nose. I can't imagine not having her.
I plan on talking to my doctor at my appointment next Friday. But does anyone else feel like this ever? How do you handle it. Any STMs feel like this in their first pregnancy?
I am usually the most positive person ever. I always can find the good in the bad and I am almost never worried because things that are out of my control can't be changed, but I can position myself the best way possible with what is in my control. I just can't do that right now
Re: Fear/ Anxiety
I hope someone has better advice for you. But just know you are not alone.
I just cannot imagine a life without this baby boy, and that's the most frightening situation I can ever imagine.
But I try to keep calm by relying on odds. By making it this far with a healthy baby, our odds are most definitely in our favor.
My boy is here kicking me as I type this.
Wishing a healthy and stress-free pregnancy to us all!
It's a boy! Grow baby, grow! EDD: 4/22/2016
I can throw statistics at you about the unlikelihood of you losing your LO this late in the game, but it sounds like you already know, and just need a pep talk. Keep us updated with how you're doing, and try to keep your chin up. /another hug
This is my rainbow baby after a loss st 10 weeks, and I constantly check his heartbeat on my monitor even if I just felt him kick a few hours prior. If I do anything out of the ordinary, I check his heartbeat again. I agree that a loss this late in the game, when I've already gotten used to the idea of this little boy being my son, would be beyond devastating.
Remember that your sadness and anxiety releases cortisol, a stress hormone that can be harmful to your child in large amounts. This is why I'm saying that if you're feeling this is a little more than regular mommy-worry... Seek help finding proactive ways to manage your stress levels. Spend some time in the sunshine, around friends, even around other babies so you can envision your future child and not a potential loss. Maybe start a baby scrapbook about your pregnancy thus far and all the positive experiences you and your little one have already had together. Make your story a positive one, starting ASAP.
It does help to 1) not feel alone in these feelings and 2) to just say some of this "out loud" to people who understand.
I had a 10 minute conversation earlier with one of the managers at one of my stores (I am loss prevention over 8 stores) and she kind of explained stuff in a silly way and it oddly made me feel way better.
She said it could be the combination of getting through the holidays and this is probably the first time in my pregnancy things have slowed down at work and seeing my friend in person for the first time since her loss. Then she went into her anxieties in her pregnancy and how she basically became Seth Rogan in Knocked up when he was driving the baby home at the end.
I also just got done talking to my best friend and the doctors have found the cause of her losses and her LO passing basically saved her life. She had a clotting disorder that could have killed her and the LO. In reality the doctor said her DS (who is 2) is practically a miracle baby. She said her LO was her guardian angel. So the reality that her baby had a purpose to fulfill, even if it was accomplished in the womb has definitely made some of the anxiety calm down.