I know there are a million threads about Moms in the delivery room...but I have to ask for some insight from a different perspective:
My husband and I have decided on not having anyone in the room except for the two of us. We told moms they can be on stand by, as it is our first baby and if we are overwhelmed we will call them in, but will be going into it with the intentions of being alone.
His mom took it great and was very supportive...my mom? Not so much. She cried like a baby, and man is it tough to see that woman cry, especially with all these hormones!
We hang out every Saturday and today she was very distant. She didn't seem herself. I know she is hurt, but i genuinely want to be alone with my husband. My mom isn't obnoxious and i know she wouldn't get in my nerves being there or anything like that, but these are my and my husbands final moments being just the two of us for the rest of our lives. I've tried explaining it to her a million different ways and she just seems so upset/offensed/hurt. She told me cousin she doesn't want to stress me out and talk about it anymore, but her change in demeanor is very stressful since her and I are so close.
Anyway, I'm rambling. Let me get to the point! My cousin, who had a baby girl two years ago, tried to play mediator and comfort her since she did it without her mom (she did it drug free and regretted her decision where as I will be medicated but again, I'm rambling) and I guess my mom made her feel bad too because she called me playing devils advocate. She said that now that she is the mom of a little girl, she can understand why my mom wants to be there so bad, and that she would never want to miss that for her daughter.
Maybe it's because I haven't really been a "mom" in that sense of the word yet, but I'm about to have a little girl too and I would respect my daughters wishes and not guilt her. Would it be beautiful to see your grandchild be born? Absolutely! But I wouldn't want to impose and take away from her and husbands/SO's special moment.
STMs was mom in the room? Did you regret your decision (either way)? If you were w/o mom and had a little girl, has your opinion changed?
I hate seeing my mom upset, but think it's super unfair that I'm feeling guilty for what should be my decision. These hormones, and being weeks away from having a little girl of my own is making my empathetic for my mom, but I don't want to change my and my husbands wishes to save her feelings, as harsh as that may sound.
I'm just wondering if maybe I'm being insensitive to her feelings as my cousin suggested?