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October 2015 Moms
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How to handle change in routine during holidays

jasminelukejasmineluke member
in October 2015 Moms
So our 11 week daughter has finally fell into some sort of routine and we are finally starting to understand her rhythm a little better.
We are spending 4 nights at my parents and I'm so worried how to handle change in schedule and routine in a new environment. I know my parents will want to play with her and have her take naps in their laps or arms or try to push nap time shorter or bedtime later so they can play or spend more time with her. I'm all for them bonding with her during the holidays but I don't want to change her routine at all since I'm going back to work in a week .
Advice on how to gently and politically Handle family intrusions on baby's new routine??
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Re: How to handle change in routine during holidays

  • AiramJAiramJ member
    Personally, my answer to that is short. I would not change the routine. My family has to fit into my son's schedule, not the other way round.
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  • momma2charmomma2char member
    I wouldn't change the routine either, especially that close to you going back to work. I'm spending today with my family and Christmas Day I'll be at my in laws place, but I will be bringing her rock n play (and everything else we need for her nap time and bed time) with us. She's usually only up for just over an hour at a time and we've made everyone clear we will be sticking to our routine, otherwise she gets super cranky!
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  • momma2charmomma2char member
    ^ I have to add too that my girl doesn't really like to cuddle and gets overwhelmed and overstimulated easily, so people wanting to hold her and have her fall asleep on them wouldn't really work. If she falls asleep on someone it lasts 15 minutes maximum, which is why she naps and sleeps in the rock n play in a separate room. If your daughter takes most of her naps in your arms and sleeps well on people and you're okay with her napping on someone then that should be fine. You could just let the person know that's holding her that she should be napping and maybe they could help get her to sleep on them rather than play with her?
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  • jasminelukejasmineluke member
    Those are good points. Problem is that I'll be staying at their house for 4 nights (since they live so far) and I just hate getting into it with my parents because they don't always agree with my parenting choices and I'll be stuck there.
    I guess I need to stand my ground with her naps and bedtime because she will just get too cranky otherwise. They don't believe in schedules or routines ... Which I can understand if baby does fine without them but my baby does well with it. She screams bloody murder before each nap but quickly goes to sleep within 5-10 mins ... If it were up to her she wouldn't nap at all and be super cranky haha.
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  • tracij12tracij12 member
    How often do you see your parents? I know I will totally be in the minority here, but I would just go with it and be flexible with the routine and habits within the limits that baby will allow without losing it.
    Married DH 08.28.10
    Pregnancy #1: BFP 04.10.11 EDD 12.23.11 DD1 Born 12.4.11
     Pregnancy #2: BFP 5.12.14 MC 5.20.14 @ 5wk4d
    Pregnancy #3: BFP 11.1.14 EDD 7.5.15 MC 11.13.14 @ 6wk4d
    Pregnancy #4: BFP 1.31.15 EDD 10.5.15 DD2 Born 9.23.15
     
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  • jasminelukejasmineluke member
    Well we see each other monthly and spent a week at Thanksgiving ... Which was rough so I'm dreading it again haha
    Added stress that DH who is a great father butts head with my parents too so will be holding my breath until holidays are over ... Ugh lol
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  • midge519midge519 member
    I'm also in the minority here where I would go with the flow. I would be stricker with bed than naps but I would be flexible with everyone. Babies usually end up changing their own routine in different locations so you may end up having to be flexible to her instead of flexible for your family.
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  • chein1chein1 member
    midge519 said:

    I'm also in the minority here where I would go with the flow. I would be stricker with bed than naps but I would be flexible with everyone. Babies usually end up changing their own routine in different locations so you may end up having to be flexible to her instead of flexible for your family.

    This! Whenever we go to my parents' house (about 3 times a week for dinner) LO changes the routine herself because it's a new environment. I wouldn't stress about keeping a strict schedule.
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  • lindsayp916lindsayp916 member
    We have our LO on a schedule and we just continued it at our parents houses- During thanksgiving, my MIL woke up the baby from her nap twice and it was hell so we had a sit down with her and said that she doesnt have to agree with our parenting decisions but she has to respect that we are the parents and we have the final say, or she will not get to spend time with the baby. During her wake time, MIL (or whoever) is free to hold baby the entire time, but it is important to us that she sleeps at designated times. After that convo everything went well- and actually we were able to stick to the schedule with no problems and it didn't seem like a big deal at all. She also slept thru the night and didn't keep the whole house up, so I am sure the family appreciated us sticking to the schedule for that benefit.

    I will add that during these family times, we were just hanging out at their houses sitting around- if we were going to an event (like church), we would be more flexible but I'm not disrupting her schedule just because my mom wants to hold her for 30 more minutes.

    I personally think especially when there are so many other changes happening (sleeping in a new place, new smells/lights/sounds/etc), sticking to the routine helps keep my LO from getting too overwhelmed. The only time she has been out of control fussy was the holiday when her nap times were disturbed. It makes me happy that during her wake times with family she's a bubbly happy baby with no tears! Everyone wins!
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  • Dawnmarie0310Dawnmarie0310 member
    edited December 2015
    removed for TOU violation
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