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May 2016 Moms
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Siblings

mmemartinezmmemartinez member
in May 2016 Moms
My DS is super excited about being a big brother and it is super adorable. He hugs the "baby", gives kisses, wants to buy him/her presents etc. He has also become way more attached to me. He's always been a mama's boy but now he wants to sleep with me every night, wants me to do everything and can be a bit nasty to DH when I can't do something. Has anyone else experienced this? It's certainly manageable but I don't want it to get worse or become an issue when the baby is actually here. TIA!
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Re: Siblings

  • kbrands7kbrands7 member
    I've encountered some of this. DS is also super excited and has been setting aside a few toys of his that are more baby-toys "for baby." He pats and kisses my belly, and has asked other family members if they have a baby in their belly (even DH, which is sort of funny). He has also always been primarily a mama-boy, though there are times he only has eyes for DH. I'm trying to capitalize on those more so that he'll go to us equally more often. He's still very insistent about cuddling with me at bedtime and the past week or so, he has wanted me to sleep with him again too; he puts one hand on my bump and another on my cheek and cuddles in. It's really cute, but the problem is that at this point, bed-sharing isn't too practical because we wake each other up. Over the next couple weeks, I'm going to wean him off of the bed-sharing again (which I've mostly given in to for at least part of every night because I'm tired!) Then, we'll work to pass off bedtime routines to DH sometimes. 

    When he was even younger and wanted only me for things, we started doing some things as a whole family-- like if we was upset, we'd do a group-hug, or both DH and I would help him, or both would be present for naptime, etc. It wasn't very efficient in the moment, but it gave DS the association that both of us would help him. He'll still usually come to me first, but if I can't do something, he'll more easily accept DH's help (except for bedtime...which is up next). This might be something to try if you haven't yet!
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  • laurenmdrn16laurenmdrn16 member
    We have been running into this issue too, especially with my son wanting just me to pick him up or do tubby time. It is strange because he used to be way closer to MH, but with the baby coming he is now attached to my hip! I like what @kbrands7 suggested about having both you and your SO be involved with comforting him and naptime etc. I also found that getting my son a baby doll really helped. He loves to carry that thing around, feed it, and put it down for nap. I am hoping that while I am caring for the real baby, he will still be interested in his baby so he won't get too jealous that I can't be picking him up all the time. I do plan to wear the new baby so that might make things a bit easier since my hands will still be free and I have experience baby wearing two at once (worked as a nanny) so I might do that sometimes if both need some cuddle time. Also, when I ask my son to be mommy's helper, he gladly drops the whining and is so excited to be a helper and get my water bottle or a throw blanket etc. If he starts getting clingy while I am feeding the new baby or otherwise busy, I will try asking him to be a helper and get diapers/water/boppy etc. 

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  • jessiedee13jessiedee13 member
    I had this issue with my last baby. He was 15 months when DS#2 was born and while excited to he a big bro, he was VERY clingy to me, which was odd considering he was the biggest grandma's boy you could imagine. We built up staying more than one night at grandma's since I'd be in the hospital for 4 days and there were several nights we got called to come get him or just calm him down (we live next door so it wasn't a big deal).
    When we were in the hospital his grandparents brought him by everyday to see us. The first day he left screaming scared from mama having rubes and such (iv, cath...he'd never seen anything like that before) but after that first day he was fine and even "held" his baby brother.
    When we came home from the hospital he was actually mad at me. Wanted nothing to do with me at all....that is until I was changing the baby's diaper...and he moved. DS#2 kicked his legs and my oldest saw it. He ran excited screaming to the other room to find grandma and grandpa to show them his baby brother! He was beyond excited! He figured out mama brought home a kid to play with vs this weird thing that just laid there. Then he got snuggly with me and the baby and it's remained that way since. My oldest understood quite quickly and easily that the baby needed mama right now, and he would settle for daddy or grandma or someone.
    They're best friends now :) and it's awesome to see their relationship blossom. I'm hoping DS#2 handles the baby transition just as well!
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