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November 2015 Moms
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C-section blues

Kbooher62312Kbooher62312 member
in November 2015 Moms
I have a question for everyone. I feel so wrong feeling the way I do but i have such sad feelings about my emergency c section. I'm so thankful my beautiful girl is safe & in my arms but I'm just so disappointed and sad that I didn't get the birth I wanted & now I feel I have so many more risks & things to watch out for since havjng this. I'm also so bitter towards anyone having vaginal births cause I feel as if it was ripped away from me. How can I deal with these emotions in order to better accept the c section and move on?
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Re: C-section blues

  • Lolo427Lolo427 member
    I think it's much more important to focus on what you have and had opposed to what you don't or didn't. I also had a Csection despite hours of pushing and as disappointing for me that it is, focusing on the experience takes away from the fact that I have a heathy daughter. She needed to come into this world via Csection because her foot was wrapped by the cord and she was traverse/sunny side up. That was the safest for both her and I. Now I try to focus much more on the future opposed to what happened in the past. When the time comes for another pregnancy I will weigh decisions with my husband and Doctor. Likewise I can't blame others for circumstances that allowed them the birth they wanted, that's thier story, I have my own and it's a story I'll be proud to tell my daughter one day and wear the effort and love it took to bring her into the world. I'm sorry you're struggling with this and I hope your able to find peace soon.
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  • itstheblackwidowbabyitstheblackwidowbaby member
    So first off, tell yourself daily that you didn't fail. Your body did not fail you. You didn't fail your child. Tell yourself this at least once a day out loud. While birth didn't go according to plan, your girl is here safe and sound. When was your section and how were you stitched up?
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  • Pontot31Pontot31 member
    I'm going to be honest- it took me a long time to come to terms with the CS I had with my daughter. She will be 4 next month. It was at least a year before I didn't cry when I thought about it.
    See if you have a local ICAN group. They are a CS and VBAC support group. They are even for women who choose a RCS for their next birth. Find a safe space to talk about it with women who understand. You can go even if you don't plan on another baby.

    I always hated when people would tell me all that mattered was a healthy mom and baby. My feelings also matter and it always felt good to hear that.

    Just know that you did all you could and there is nothing wrong with you or the way your baby came into this world.

    I had a nurse at the hospital when my son was just born who remembered me from my daughter's birth and told me she remembered how hard I fought to have the birth I wanted and she was sorry it did the happen the way I wanted. It felt so good to hear that.
    Find a friend you know who will listen and talk to them. It also helped me to write out my birth story. It helped to process it and get my feelings out.
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