Traveling in May?

mb0112 · December 2015

I'm a FTM and will be invited to a wedding in May, about 8 weeks after my due date. It's a plane flight away, roughly 4 hours. To all the second time or more moms: is it crazy to consider flying at that point?Would you go and leave your baby with grandparents at home (2 nights)? Would you fly with the baby and take baby to the wedding (if invited to do so?) Would you just decline the wedding invite? Obviously I still have time to decide as invites will probably be sent around my due date.

It's a good friend and normally I'd have no hesitation flying to be at her wedding. I know some people leave their young babies for a weekend, but as a FTM I can't imagine how it would feel! Also if she comes late, she might be closer to just 6 weeks old and I don't know if I'd even be up for it physically.

parenthood4 · December 2015

Personally, I would probably decline. I definitely would not leave my 6-8 week old with grandparents, mainly because that's just too little for me to leave them with nursing and pumping. It's definitely possible, and I'm sure there are plenty of people who would be totally fine with it, but it wouldn't be the right choice for me personally.

If it's a very close friend, then I would consider taking the baby along (if it's okay with the couple), but I'd still prefer not to fly with a 6-8 week old who hasn't been immunized to much. Again, I'm sure there are plenty of people who would be fine with that, and there's nothing wrong with that.

It's hard because it's just a personal preference thing with no right answer, and it's hard to totally know how you'll feel about it before the baby is here.

smushi · December 2015

I'd always vote no personally, but for me, we were just so much more comfortable at home. It's not impossible of course. If you're breastfeeding, you wouldn't want to leave the baby for that long. If you took the baby with you, you'd want to know if you could bring LO to the wedding. You'd have to take the carseat (I believe) on the plane ride, although some moms find it much easier to wear the baby in a carrier through the airport and during the flight. You'd want to check with the hotel about having a crib. Lots of factors to consider. Will you have fun at the wedding? Will it mean a huge deal to your friend to see you and say hello for 30 seconds?

yodapup · December 2015

If baby is allowed to be at the wedding, I say go for it. I think traveling with an infant is so much easier than with a toddler. You can wear your baby through security and on the plane (some airlines make you take the baby out during takeoff/ landing). With my experience, feed your baby during takeoff (helps with the ears) and he/she will sleep during the whole flight. You can always gate check the car seat and stroller and hotels usually provide pack n plays free of charge. Physically you should be be fine to attend within 6-8 weeks of you have a normal delivery. I have no experience with c-sections and recovery time if that happens. Traveling with an infant seems real scary the first time but it's really no big deal.

jmathi0149 · December 2015

We took DS on a 9 hour flight to Europe when he was 8 weeks old. It was the easiest flight we have ever had. He slept the entire time except when he wanted to eat or needed a change. Nursing was so easy and convenient. I agree with pp! If the baby is allowed at the wedding, go for it! We have always said kids fit into our lives not the other way around.

red3ye · December 2015

I say go for it. Again, your personal choice, but there is a good chance you and your baby will be just fine to attend together

jenniferamcooper · December 2015

If you want to I'd go for it! Lots of factors to consider but travelling with a newborn is a heck of a lot easier than with older babies. At 8 weeks I travelled to visit my parents which is a 4 and a half hour car ride. If it was me I'd plan on it and I even had a c section, I would have felt comfortable travelling 3/4 weeks after.
I'd specially ask bride and groom if kids are allowed, otherwise I might change my mind. If possible get a hotel really close to the reception venue and see if you can get a sitter for the dance portion of the evening. At my friend's wedding her sister came with her 5 week old twins and they had a great time. The kids were great for the wedding and reception. The reception was in a hotel so she got the kids to bed and my friend had arranged a neighbourhood teenager to stay with the twins. Her sister seriously had a blast.

RoMama113 · December 2015

Personally, I would feel that is too early to leave the baby. Not only the separation, but it would be so hard to pump and not breastfeed. I didn't leave my first for that long until he was about a year old. If it were me, I'd decline going to the wedding. Or if it's a very good friend, bring the baby with you although you are risking them getting sick with all the airplane germs. Wear the baby on and breastfeed on takeoff and landing.

flowerpower5838 · December 2015

Sooooo thoughts on driving to a wedding that's ~4 hours away ~4 weeks postpartum? We'd bring baby, get a hotel room, etc.

red3ye · December 2015

I believe you would be ok as far as baby is concerned. But it will depend on you and how you are healing. At 4 weeks after having ds, I was ok to travel, but I know some people are not so lucky

MrsLeanMeanClean · December 2015

I am due early march and flying late may to from UK to NY to spend 7 weeks with my family (sans DH he comes later for the 4th of July). The day of flying will be a pain but I know when I get there I will have a big support network. If you will have people in the wedding location to help... or your mum would maybe come along then go for it!

I am however not booking tickets till post birth.. just incase everything goes tits up and physically I am not going to be ready to fly etc

skruhmin · December 2015

flowerpower5838 said:

Sooooo thoughts on driving to a wedding that's ~4 hours away ~4 weeks postpartum? We'd bring baby, get a hotel room, etc.

4 weeks pp you personally should be fine. Both of my boys were car seat haters at that point so they would scream the entire time - not worth it for my sanity purposes.

irenewslee · December 2015

I wouldn't leave the baby so if the wedding allows baby attendance, I would go. Babies at that age are pretty easy with flights. I would just wear the baby the whole flight to keep him/her comfortable and nurse when needed. I took mine on a short flight when she was around 12 weeks and took her on other trips when she was 8 and 16 months old. I would say it was MUCH easier at 12 weeks.

flowerpower5838 · December 2015

Thanks for the tips ladies. DH really wants to go to this wedding but I'd honestly rather stay home. We may play it by ear as the date gets a little closer.

amaniupendo · December 2015

I would probably go, but I'm probably not the model of wise decisions when it comes to travel.

I'm a believer of if I would do it pre-baby, I will do it post-baby. It has worked well so far-- our DD is an amazing traveler and adaptable/pleasant in almost all situations.

amaniupendo · December 2015

Oh also, I would not leave the baby at home while I go out of town for any amount of time at that point.

Logistically, it would be hard if nursing.

Emotionally, I don't think I'd be ready that soon.

The sleep would be nice though, ha.

alligreer88 · December 2015

It would be a huge pain and a ton of stress, but it's totally do able. My daughter will be in daycare 8 hours a day at 8 weeks and although it's not overnight, daycare doesn't stop my baby from being BF. Personally though, I wouldn't leave her overnight (my own problem, not the babies or a reflection of my mom who would watch). Overall, I probably wouldn't do it just because weddings aren't that awesome to me - it's not like you really get time to bond with your friend, although I understand showing your support. The wedding headcount changing by 2 adults probably isn't going to effect anything that much, I would give yourself the chance to make the decision at the last minute - even if that means backing out or showing up un announced, most wedding have the flexibility built in and you're totally the family that deserves to be that 5% that changes last minute. 4 hours seems like a longish flight for newborn and you being post partum. I'm doing a 2.5 hour flight at 30 weeks with my 4yo, and that will be about my limit.

ecwk · December 2015

I'll be flying home at some stage in June with baby. Wild horses couldn't stop me!!

mb0112 · December 2015

Thanks for all the input! Yes at 6-9 weeks old I don't think I'll feel comfortable leaving her home-- as a FTM I don't know what that would feel like. I guess I'll wait and see if baby is invited and make a decision as it gets closer. True that the bride would understand and it's not like I'd see her very much during the weekend, but I'd like to fly out for her wedding as she did for mine and be there to see her get married! Also the destination city is one that I love and my husband had never been.

2-Step · December 2015

I wouldn't personally leave my babies that young. I don't think it's necessarily bad for them, I just couldn't do it. As for traveling, I think you need to decide if you are going to have fun or just for support and to be there for her. I don't imagine a trip like that being very fun at all so I would only go if it's about being there for your friend. At that time I am usually a sleep deprived mess and watching everyone else party it up while trying to find places to breastfeed etc. would not be fun for me. Clothing is also challenging at that stage. I also think it totally depends on the temperament of your child. My first was colicky and screamed bloody murder every night from 8pm-11pm. My second probably wouldn't have made a peep.

Want a personalized experience?

Traveling in May?

Re: Traveling in May?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards