May 2016 Moms

UO Thursday 12/10

13

Re: UO Thursday 12/10

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  • AliciaD39 said:
    js8812 said:
    I agree with those who are not a fan of Trump.  I think the reason why he has so many supporters is because he isn't a traditional politician and people are just fed up with our political climate.

    I agree with those people, but he is non-traditional in the worst way. Who wants a president who rates women's looks or says he would be dating his daughter if she wasn't related to him? Not even getting into the political side of it... he is just extremely creepy.

    @aliciad39 Oh, I'm definitely with you a 100%, but just saying that it seems like people are going to extremes because they are tired of everything.  I don't think he will get the nomination though. I HOPE we have more sense than that! :|

  • @jessiedee13 - Good for you! I remember one of my cousins refusing to BF and all the old aunties and grandmothers tsking at her and saying she wasn't a real mother and other such nonsense and it drove me nuts! You do what feels right, and eventually other people will lay off! 

    My UO: I hate socks. So much. They are the worst and I am not sure how anyone tolerates them all day.
    BabyFruit Ticker
  • So I just read this article: https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-news/world-first-test-tube-puppies-are-born-n477221

    My UO is that I think dog breeding is archaic (and using test tube babies to do so is ridiculous). With so many dogs and puppies in need of rescue and adoption, not to mention the many genetic problems plaguing so many breeds because of inbreeding, I think the whole thing has become irresponsible.

    Flame away!



    I had the same thought when I saw this on the news! It's bad enough that we already have breeders breeding purebreds with all their problems and disabilities (a friend of the family's purebread is dying currently because of a genetic defect in the purebred line ... why is this happening!?), but to actively push it a step farther? No. No thank you. Drives me nuts

    BabyFruit Ticker
  • AmmyBelle said:

    @jessiedee13 - Good for you! I remember one of my cousins refusing to BF and all the old aunties and grandmothers tsking at her and saying she wasn't a real mother and other such nonsense and it drove me nuts! You do what feels right, and eventually other people will lay off! 


    My UO: I hate socks. So much. They are the worst and I am not sure how anyone tolerates them all day.
    I actually don't get any of that here. My family supports each other (kind of...in their own way, but the don't flame me for it and that equals support), my inlaws are very supportive of whatever you choose for kid. I'm lucky. And so are all the breastfeeding mothers around here. The only place there's ever tension or side eyeing is in public. I get it when I get out the formula and bottle. My friend gets it when she covers to BF or just BFs without a cover. It's something about being in the public eye that causes the issue. Like people would prefer the baby to scream or something...get a grip, right?

    Also 100% with you on socks. DH only takes his off to shower...he wears them to bed and everything...just...ew...why...it's 47 degrees here today and I'll be in flip flops still thanks :)
  • @txmamatobe I too live in Texas and I just don't get Uggs. Even if it was consistently cold enough to justify owning a pair, I wouldn't want my feet to look like two amorphous blobs at the end of my legs. Uggs with shorts takes it to another level.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


    Pregnancy Ticker

  • @zekesmommy611  I'm totally with you on the strange name spellings.  I also hate the completely made-up ones.  I have a friend from HS on FB who has a daughter named Kaizlea.  Why!?  Who is going to take her seriously when she gets older and starts interviewing for jobs, etc.?  I say this because my parents thought they were being so different by mixing the letters of their own names and giving me a strange, made-up name.  As an attorney who has to have my name all over legal documents all the time, it's really annoying.  That, and I hate having to repeat my name half a dozen times when I introduce myself.  There's a whole thread on this topic over on the Baby Names board.  We haven't' decided on a name yet, but I can guarantee it won't be something completely out there!


  • swflJD said:

    @zekesmommy611  I'm totally with you on the strange name spellings.  I also hate the completely made-up ones.  I have a friend from HS on FB who has a daughter named Kaizlea.  Why!?  Who is going to take her seriously when she gets older and starts interviewing for jobs, etc.?  I say this because my parents thought they were being so different by mixing the letters of their own names and giving me a strange, made-up name.  As an attorney who has to have my name all over legal documents all the time, it's really annoying.  That, and I hate having to repeat my name half a dozen times when I introduce myself.  There's a whole thread on this topic over on the Baby Names board.  We haven't' decided on a name yet, but I can guarantee it won't be something completely out there!



    That's a really good point actually! I have a name that isn't totally uncommon anymore, but uncommon enough that no one seems to be able to pronounce it or spell it correctly. It definitely makes a difference for me in naming my children. I don't want them to dread saying their name on the phone like I do!
  • EErin86 said:
    If I don't eat a single Christmas cookie this month I will be fine. (Baby is not into sweets)
    My baby isn't either and I used to have such a sweet tooth!!

    Me: 31

    DH: 29, SA - Great

    Married: June 12,2011

    TTC #1: 1/2014

    Diagnosis: Hypothalamic Amenorrhea

    Treatment: Clomid:  50mg, 100mg, 150mg - not successful and not monitored

                      Menopur 75ml (upped to 112.5ml), Ovidrel, & IUI  IUI #1 8/31/2015

    9/15/2015: BFP HCG - 400, 9/17/2015: HCG - 827, 9/21/2015 - HCG 3,327!
    Heartbeat 10/2/2015: 118bpm
    DS: 5/27/2016

    TTC# 2: 12/2017
    BFP: 4/20/2018
    EDD: 12/29/2018
  • bshurdy said:
    I wish parents wouldn't post pictures on social media of their toddlers on the toilet. I get it; I know you're proud of your child for potty training.. but maybe just make a post about it without a photo. 

    I am so glad my parents didn't have social media when I was a kid. 

    I can only imagine what my mother would have posted if she would have had social media back then!  She already embarrasses me with some of her posts on FB sometimes now!  This is something MH and I have already talked about.  While we are both active on social media and intend to post some pics of our kid on there, the degree of oversharing has gotten out of control for a lot of parents. Their kids are going to hate them for those posts one day! 

    I guess my UO is that the parents whose entire lives revolve around their children annoy/scare me. As soon as I got my BFP, I had a little meltdown that MH still laughs about. I was crying to him that I was so scared that I would "lose myself" and that I would be defined as "just" someone's mom once we had a child. He promised me that he wouldn't let that happen, but it's still a fear in the back of my mind.
  • swflJD said:

    I guess my UO is that the parents whose entire lives revolve around their children annoy/scare me. As soon as I got my BFP, I had a little meltdown that MH still laughs about. I was crying to him that I was so scared that I would "lose myself" and that I would be defined as "just" someone's mom once we had a child. He promised me that he wouldn't let that happen, but it's still a fear in the back of my mind.
    I don't think that is an UO. I think a lot of us feel that way. I lost myself a bit for the first 18 months or so but that's because so much happens in that time. Kids go from born to walking pretty quickly, honestly. There's a lot of development in that time. It's natural to have life revolve around your child in that time period. Once my DD turned 2, I was able to focus a little bit more on me. Once she turned 3 I was really able to do some things to be me not just Mommy. It's part of why I blog, have an Etsy shop, have pie night dates with my friends, etc. I need my identity outside of mommy-hood. Kids are only kids for so long. Enjoy it. Love it. But don't lose yourself to have to figure yourself out again when they are grown and gone.

    That's a large portion of the reason I wasn't overly excited to find out I was pregnant...even though we had been trying for a year and had just had a miscarriage. I like having time to spend on just being me. I know I'm going to lose that again for awhile. Which is okay. But I had to grieve that. Still will sometimes I'm sure.

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
    Married: 1/2008 ~ DD#1: 3/2012
    TTC #2: Started 4/2014       BFP 7/30/15   MC 8/3/15       BFP 9/4/2015   EDD 5/16/2016

    image
  • The name issue is a bit annoying for me because I have been asked several times what names I am considering. When I tell people they make faces and ask why I can't come up with a "real" name or a normal name. My family is Armenian and most of my family members have very Armenian names. I'm only half and I got a short, generic, very basic name so I think people don't really realize I am in fact Armenian. I do understand that sometimes people do make stuff up but not all "weird" names are made up. Sometimes they might just come from a different culture. 

    I want to chime in on the BF thing as well and I am not wearing my Judgey pants for this but I have had a hard time understanding why some people aren't interested in trying BFing as well. I know lots of people can't do it because of work or various other things like that but I don't really get it from SAHMs. Reading some of the ladies comments here has helped understand some peoples reasons but most of the people I know personally who are against it give stupid  ( to me ) reasons. I know someone who thinks its a shameful and very sexual thing to want to BF. What? Sexual?! Some people just seem to think its a very dirty thing to do or that it's very primitive. 

    My UO is that i really dislike McNuggets. I find them to be rubbery and gross tasting. I can think of so many other places i would rather go to get Chicken Nugget fast food items but really I would pick so many other things to eat before even considering fast food nuggets. (I know I said I hadn't had them since high school in a previous thread. I tried them the other day to see if I was missing out on something . . . Nope.)
  • AmmyBelle said:
    @jessiedee13 - Good for you! I remember one of my cousins refusing to BF and all the old aunties and grandmothers tsking at her and saying she wasn't a real mother and other such nonsense and it drove me nuts! You do what feels right, and eventually other people will lay off! 

    My UO: I hate socks. So much. They are the worst and I am not sure how anyone tolerates them all day.
    THIS. If I didn't live in the northeast, I would never wear socks.
  • I'll stop before I get too cheeseball, but I just wanted to let you know that it's normal to feel that way, and encourage you that it definitely doesn't have to mean the end of "you".
    Adding to this, no, doesn't have to be the end of "you." It does, however, mean you need to be more intentional about being you. You have to make the time to do things that are you. You can't just let it happen like you do now.

    Every year for Mother's Day my DH gives me the gift of an entire day to myself. It is amazing. Until we decided to sell the house, found out my DH needs his wisdom teeth out, and a bunch of other money sucking things, I was honestly planning and saving towards an entire weekend to myself, at a hotel, about 1.5 hours from here where the good shopping is. An alone babymoon if you will. Just to go be....me.

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
    Married: 1/2008 ~ DD#1: 3/2012
    TTC #2: Started 4/2014       BFP 7/30/15   MC 8/3/15       BFP 9/4/2015   EDD 5/16/2016

    image
  • LemmyRN said:

    @zekezmommy661 my sister loves to do this and its ridiculous. She named her second daughter Oasys... so all her teachers will either try and teach her the correct spelling or think "poor kid, her mom is dyslexic."

    U/O: I HATE the show Wife Swap. They like to present it as a "social experiment," when really they purposely set these families up for the most "Jerry Springer" type of conflict, and children are the ones who suffer the most.

    I once talked with someone who was on Wife Swap and it's completely fake. They only filmed for 2-3 days (not the full week like they claim it goes on) and told everyone what to do/ say.

    Most reality TV is scripted- I auditioned for a show once, and they basically completely changed who I was and told me what to say.
  • @TheThornBird
    That's a relief... I still hate the show. But at least the family impact is phony.
  • The idea of me, personally breastfeeding squicks me out. I'm fine w/ other people doing it in all situations but me? Ugh. Ew. I really hope I get hit with some hormone that make me feel differently soon. But right now? Ew. (I'll probably do it anyway, though).
  • The idea of me, personally breastfeeding squicks me out. I'm fine w/ other people doing it in all situations but me? Ugh. Ew. I really hope I get hit with some hormone that make me feel differently soon. But right now? Ew. (I'll probably do it anyway, though).


    Amen sister.
  • On the name thing, I'm not against different spellings as long as it still makes sense. My cousin named her daughter kennedy. My niece named her daughter kennedie. Neither way bothers me at all. If we have a girl. I'm naming her Brooklynn. Yes. 2 n's. End of the world for alot of people I know. It still looks professional. I don't see a problem with it. Again to each their own. I have a bigger issue with the whole "ima name my kid soda pop" generation...like come on guys...
  • kami09 said:
    swflJD said:

    I guess my UO is that the parents whose entire lives revolve around their children annoy/scare me. As soon as I got my BFP, I had a little meltdown that MH still laughs about. I was crying to him that I was so scared that I would "lose myself" and that I would be defined as "just" someone's mom once we had a child. He promised me that he wouldn't let that happen, but it's still a fear in the back of my mind.
    I don't think that is an UO. I think a lot of us feel that way. I lost myself a bit for the first 18 months or so but that's because so much happens in that time. Kids go from born to walking pretty quickly, honestly. There's a lot of development in that time. It's natural to have life revolve around your child in that time period. Once my DD turned 2, I was able to focus a little bit more on me. Once she turned 3 I was really able to do some things to be me not just Mommy. It's part of why I blog, have an Etsy shop, have pie night dates with my friends, etc. I need my identity outside of mommy-hood. Kids are only kids for so long. Enjoy it. Love it. But don't lose yourself to have to figure yourself out again when they are grown and gone.

    That's a large portion of the reason I wasn't overly excited to find out I was pregnant...even though we had been trying for a year and had just had a miscarriage. I like having time to spend on just being me. I know I'm going to lose that again for awhile. Which is okay. But I had to grieve that. Still will sometimes I'm sure.

    I kind of see it in a different light. This is going to get cheesey- but I feel like I didn't lose myself at all. Quite the opposite- I found myself. I feel like being a mother has brought out the very best qualities in me and some of the ones I didn't exactly like are gone. For example, before being a mom, I loved to go out, drink, etc. Problem was- I was a terrible drunk. Since becoming a mom, I haven't had the urge to go out...ever. I'd rather be at home with my baby than having drinks with friends. 

    I feel like I am more compassionate, patient, etc. I have had to make sacrifices but that comes with the territory. I've found new things that can be just for me...they just changed. But that's normal- we constantly change and grow. I won't lie- I don't have a ton of time for myself, but on most days, it doesn't bother me. & if people see me as just someone's mom, fine...cuz it's the one thing I'm most proud of.

    I'm glad to know this is something other mothers/mothers-to-be are feeling/have felt, too (one of the many reasons I love this board!). I kind of felt alone in feeling that way because most family members and friends I had mentioned it to kind of acted like I was crazy or selfish for having those feelings.  I know I'm going to completely adore this LO and that caring for him is going to take up a huge part of my life (especially in the beginning), but I have a career, hobbies, friends, family, and a husband that I don't want to neglect either. I guess my biggest concern is trying to find way to balance it all. 

    After seeing a close friend who became completely obsessed with her kid (to the point where she stopped participating in any hobbies, socializing with any friends, and every conversation with her consisted of the most "amazing" things her kid did that week (i.e., rolled over, used the potty, got a gold star at pre-school, etc.), it made me realize how easy it is to get sucked into that world where "you" don't exist.  But, like @Bluejay3030 mentioned, I am looking forward to the fun side of parenting where I can eventually share my passions with my LO, too. I guess it's just a balancing act that will take time and practice to perfect.      
  • The idea of me, personally breastfeeding squicks me out. I'm fine w/ other people doing it in all situations but me? Ugh. Ew. I really hope I get hit with some hormone that make me feel differently soon. But right now? Ew. (I'll probably do it anyway, though).

    Haha, this was sooo me with DD. I don't remember at what point in my pregnancy I finally caved to the idea of at least trying breastfeeding, but to be honest it probably had something to do with a combination of being deterred by formula costs and hoping to lose the baby weight with minimal effort. So nothing noble.

    Strangely, it wasn't really weird to me to actually breastfeed until DD started asking for it and trying to put her hand down my shirt around 14 months. Then I was like noooope, we're done! That was just me, though. Everyone is different when it comes to what they can handle.
  • Just curious, how much does BF'ing actually factor into your baby weight loss?  Does it make that big of a difference?
  • @Aquinna82 I feel like BF has done the exact opposite. I started taking long walks with DS, eating clean... nothing. I think my body was holding onto all the extra fat BECAUSE I was BF. (Not sure if this is even scientifically possible- but that's how I feel haha)

  • On BF: I am pro BF but find it hard to pass judgement on moms who decide to not BF. The reason why is bc that would be like me passing judgement on their other parenting choices. I think it's silly that people put shoes on their babies before they can even walk. It desensitizes their feet and doesn't make any sense to me BUT on the other hand people (my aunt) have passed judgement on me for allowing DD to go barefoot most of the time (she could step on something and hurt herself...shoes help correct any inward turning of her feet, etc). As I've always said, what works for one family will not work for others. Same with children. Doesn't make it wrong.

    My UO which I know will be extremely offensive for some is: I think it's silly that we are expected to include in a title or before a post that "Loss is mentioned." Why?? I really don't get it. Before anyone jumps on me about their losses and such... I've had in the teens of MCs so don't assume I don't know the feeling of a loss. I remember on here there was a woman who was announcing her loss and someone commented something along the lines of please put loss mentioned in your post bc it brings flashbacks or something when someone unknowingly reads and sees a loss it brings back memories. What???? I don't understand it. If anything, for me, if I read it I have a deeper feeling of sympathy for the poster not some PTSD experience that upsets me so bad I need a warning before reading about a loss.

    I agree with you.  It wouldn't bother me reading about a loss without warning, but I do know that people can be particularly sensitive about it on this board.  I always post the warning because I want to avoid any flames or banishment. :)
  • My UO which I know will be extremely offensive for some is: I think it's silly that we are expected to include in a title or before a post that "Loss is mentioned." Why?? I really don't get it. Before anyone jumps on me about their losses and such... I've had in the teens of MCs so don't assume I don't know the feeling of a loss. I remember on here there was a woman who was announcing her loss and someone commented something along the lines of please put loss mentioned in your post bc it brings flashbacks or something when someone unknowingly reads and sees a loss it brings back memories. What???? I don't understand it. If anything, for me, if I read it I have a deeper feeling of sympathy for the poster not some PTSD experience that upsets me so bad I need a warning before reading about a loss.
    I don't even think about my loss other than in passing. It happened, I grieved for a week, and then I moved on. So because I think of it so matter of factly, I don't ever remember to put loss mentioned because when I talk about it, it is so casually thrown into the paragraph.

    Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
    Married: 1/2008 ~ DD#1: 3/2012
    TTC #2: Started 4/2014       BFP 7/30/15   MC 8/3/15       BFP 9/4/2015   EDD 5/16/2016

    image
  • Can I circle back on the whole "PC" issue? I am confused, and always am about this topic, because I thought being considerate of other people's feeling and experiences was called being a decent human. Like everyone, I hear the griping about how we have to be so politically correct and its so stifling, when really the cultural shift is requiring everyone to consider everyone's feelings and perspectives. Even those they may assume are like themselves, and they are not.

    Isn't the hate for being "PC" about people's egocentric behavior and anger that not everyone thinks and acts like them? Yes, I was raised in a Christian family, but that does not mean I can't take the time to wish my friends raised in Jewish families a Happy Hanukah. It's no different than remembering and celebrating their birthdays and anniversaries with them, which they also do for me.
  • @kbrands7 stupid 5-10lbs.
    image
    Been married since 2009.
    Unicornuate Uterus (yes I menstruate glitter)
    Several MCs
    DD born 2013 (our miracle "you can't have babies" baby!)



  • The idea of me, personally breastfeeding squicks me out. I'm fine w/ other people doing it in all situations but me? Ugh. Ew. I really hope I get hit with some hormone that make me feel differently soon. But right now? Ew. (I'll probably do it anyway, though).

    A friend of mine a,ways said she'd never breastfeed, it just wasn't for her. She wasn't into it, etc etc. even after she got pregnant. But then, eventually, and I don't know why, she changed her mind and was all about it. She BF for a year.

    Me: 31

    DH: 29, SA - Great

    Married: June 12,2011

    TTC #1: 1/2014

    Diagnosis: Hypothalamic Amenorrhea

    Treatment: Clomid:  50mg, 100mg, 150mg - not successful and not monitored

                      Menopur 75ml (upped to 112.5ml), Ovidrel, & IUI  IUI #1 8/31/2015

    9/15/2015: BFP HCG - 400, 9/17/2015: HCG - 827, 9/21/2015 - HCG 3,327!
    Heartbeat 10/2/2015: 118bpm
    DS: 5/27/2016

    TTC# 2: 12/2017
    BFP: 4/20/2018
    EDD: 12/29/2018
  • mlangblom said:

    Can I circle back on the whole "PC" issue? I am confused, and always am about this topic, because I thought being considerate of other people's feeling and experiences was called being a decent human. Like everyone, I hear the griping about how we have to be so politically correct and its so stifling, when really the cultural shift is requiring everyone to consider everyone's feelings and perspectives. Even those they may assume are like themselves, and they are not.

    Isn't the hate for being "PC" about people's egocentric behavior and anger that not everyone thinks and acts like them? Yes, I was raised in a Christian family, but that does not mean I can't take the time to wish my friends raised in Jewish families a Happy Hanukah. It's no different than remembering and celebrating their birthdays and anniversaries with them, which they also do for me.

    There are just so many perspectives I don't think you can truly navigate every single conversation without potentially offending someone it seems. In my post, I was clear that you should never intentionally be inconsiderate to others. However, I'm sure we have ALL said something unknowingly that has offended someone. My point was that people don't need to take everything so personally.
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