Honestly need to vent and need some advice

kneill15 · December 2015

I'm 25+5 weeks, I am only feeling the baby for a short period of the day, and not often, like I feel i should. I feel like the baby should be getting stronger each week, but he isn't. I've tried talking to my Dr multiple times and all he tells me is "if you're concerned go to the ER" Which doesn't help, because I suffer very badly with anxiety and worrying. I called L&D today and they said I should be feeling baby latest every couple of hours and today I have not felt him in the past 12 hours, even lying still and drinking juice. Everytime I go to L&D, all the do is hook me up to the monitor and send me home, but I honestly feel like something is wrong that he isn't getting stronger or growing with his kicks. I feel like I'm going insane, but I don't think I can demand and ultra sound. Any advice? What would you ladies do?

goldie987 · December 2015

If the ER isn't finding anything weird when you go and the doctor isn't worried there isn't much to be said other than trust the professionals, especially if you have a history of anxiety issues.

cMichelle0423 · December 2015

kneill15 said:
I'm 25+5 weeks, I am only feeling the baby for a short period of the day, and not often, like I feel i should. I feel like the baby should be getting stronger each week, but he isn't. I've tried talking to my Dr multiple times and all he tells me is "if you're concerned go to the ER" Which doesn't help, because I suffer very badly with anxiety and worrying. I called L&D today and they said I should be feeling baby latest every couple of hours and today I have not felt him in the past 12 hours, even lying still and drinking juice. Everytime I go to L&D, all the do is hook me up to the monitor and send me home, but I honestly feel like something is wrong that he isn't getting stronger or growing with his kicks. I feel like I'm going insane, but I don't think I can demand and ultra sound. Any advice? What would you ladies do?

I would trust the advice given to me by the educated doctors I'm paying

kyraaD · December 2015

honestly, i think everything is fine. every pregnancy is 100% different, so they shouldn't be generalizing. baby sleeps for 12-14hrs a day, so there's still a huge chunk of the day you wont feel movement. i personally feel VERY little movement during the day from my LO. he's more active late at night when I'm trying to sleep.

if they arent finding anything then I'm sure everything is okay, & your anxiety is coming into play a little bit here. i would maybe speak to your doctor about how you anxiety is making you constantly worry something is wrong with your baby, to the point that you feel insane. that's what i would do.

PrimRoseMama · December 2015

Ultrasound won't show you anything the monitors don't. If the monitors are picking up a strong heartbeat & such-- then you are working yourself up for no good reason. If there was a true problem, the folks in L&D would tell you.

Also, do you know the position of your placenta? If you have anterior placenta then baby could very well be kicking/punching up a storm. You wouldn't feel half of it. I had anterior placenta with my son & he had to really dance it up for me to feel it.

Also, regular consistent movement is generally not expected until after 28 weeks. My doctor says to simply keep track of patterns vs. Number of kicks in an hour.

So I understand your concern, but I really think you should calm down.

clairemwalker · December 2015

@PrimRoseMama could be onto it with the placenta! I have anterior placenta (right in the middle,not low or high) and at 26+2 i have only felt more regular movement in the last 2 or so days. Even today baby was really quiet until an hour ago. Try standing still and relaxing, place both your hands on your belly. I find sometimes after a minute or two i will start feeling pressure changes with my hands, my mw said its numb there on the inside due to the placenta, but i can feel it on the outside with my hands. She actually did kick me right in the middle of the placenta yesterday, and i only felt it because i happened to have my hand on my tummy at the time! Anyway, if the monitors in L&d are showing a good heartrate, then you should try and relax.

kwrightnb · December 2015

For my entire first pregnancy I hardly ever felt baby move. Every couple days maybe, and that soon turned into maybe once a week. It was my first pregnancy and I had no idea what was normal and what wasn't. I kept expressing my concern to my doctors and they kept telling me it's normal not to feel a lot ... Well it wasn't normal. And when I went to my 28 week appt. my babies heartbeat was gone and she has stopped growing at 25 weeks and nobody noticed.. I'm not trying to scare you honestly, BUT you listen to your instinct, and if you feel something isn't right, fight for a damn ultrasound.
I went to the ER once and they found a heartbeat but never did an ultrasound, and my new doctor said if they had of done one, they would have noticed that baby wasn't growing and not moving .

shelbibrooke82 · December 2015

kyraaD said:

honestly, i think everything is fine. every pregnancy is 100% different, so they shouldn't be generalizing. baby sleeps for 12-14hrs a day, so there's still a huge chunk of the day you wont feel movement. i personally feel VERY little movement during the day from my LO. he's more active late at night when I'm trying to sleep.

I feel the most movement in the evening usually after I have eaten dinner and he is trying to get comfortable lol!

Jyoung327 · December 2015

PrimRoseMama said:

Ultrasound won't show you anything the monitors don't. If the monitors are picking up a strong heartbeat & such-- then you are working yourself up for no good reason. If there was a true problem, the folks in L&D would tell you. Also, do you know the position of your placenta? If you have anterior placenta then baby could very well be kicking/punching up a storm. You wouldn't feel half of it. I had anterior placenta with my son & he had to really dance it up for me to feel it. Also, regular consistent movement is generally not expected until after 28 weeks. My doctor says to simply keep track of patterns vs. Number of kicks in an hour. So I understand your concern, but I really think you should calm down.

^^what she said. My first question for you was if you know the position of your placenta- mine is anteverted like she mentioned so I am prepared to have a different experience.

ambercakes92 · December 2015

I have had some anxiety about feeling movement too, so I can see where you're coming from. My LO has never been much of a kicker, and until probably 32/33 weeks her movement wasn't obvious to me on a regular basis. I've never brought it up to my doctor, but as my belly grows and I feel her bigger movements I know that she's fine. However, it seems like you've seen professionals on multiple occasions that have been able to address your concerns! Do your best to trust them and the technology they are using to check on your baby.

Daenaria86 · December 2015

I worried a lot during my first pregnancy. I'm noticing my second time around I'm not nearly as stressed and don't fret over every day. My pregnancy seems like it is flying by, even though I'm just 13 weeks.

As one PP said, sometimes trusting your gut is the best thing to do. If a baby has IUGR (growth restriction) then the baby won't move much and will be small. If you feel like this is a concern, then you should absolutely push for more testing for peace of mind. If your OB isn't treating you with respect and acknowledging your concern, find a new one.

My concern from your post is that if something is (odds are there isn't) wrong, you will be ignored. Never be afraid to advocate for yourself or your child.

I will say that with my first baby I didn't feel much movement with my LO until past 30 weeks, and then it slowed down a couple weeks later as she got bigger and had less space.

Want a personalized experience?

Honestly need to vent and need some advice

Re: Honestly need to vent and need some advice

LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:

Choose Another Board

Search Boards