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Parenting Achievement Unlocked

itstheblackwidowbabyitstheblackwidowbaby member
in November 2015 Moms
As I'm trying to get a screaming Jacob to latch onto me to eat some more, I accidently squeezed my boob a bit too much and BAM! Breastmilk on his forehead, in his eye, and up his nose.

Whoops. Sorry kid.

What about everyone else? Any funny stories/fails/wins at this parenting thing?



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Re: Parenting Achievement Unlocked

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    Candy_banditCandy_bandit member
    Well...
    Changing the kid the other day, in her crib since she doesn't sleep in it we have been using it as a changing table. Turns out she was not done pooping- shoots poop in a straight-up fountain stream arc- all over the crib bars and the carpet and me. I literally screamed and jumped out of the way, husband comes running thinking something is wrong and I am just hysterically laughing and the kid is perfectly happy.
    Luckily we have natures miracle around for the puppy so used it to clean human poop off the carpet. It was amazing.
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    ColoradoHikerColoradoHiker member
    MercyC1130 said:

    It's taken me a few tries to figure out how to change a little boys diaper so that he doesn't spray pee everywhere.

    Also, despite my efforts, there is dog hair everywhere.
    In his milk mustache, his diaper, cradle, everywhere!

    We have their cats. Animal hair everywhere is just a fact of life, haha.
    DS1: Born 11.18.15
    DS2: EDD- 09.08.17

    Babysizer Cravings Pregnancy Tracker
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    cdepperschmidtcdepperschmidt member
    MercyC1130 said:

    It's taken me a few tries to figure out how to change a little boys diaper so that he doesn't spray pee everywhere.

    Also, despite my efforts, there is dog hair everywhere.
    In his milk mustache, his diaper, cradle, everywhere!

    Ugh...the dog hair!!! It's everywhere! I feel like I need to lint roll my child before we leave the house.
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    MercyC1130MercyC1130 member
    @ColoradoHiker It's funny while I was pregnant I was SO concerned about all this hair.. This is one thing I'm not ftm-ing so hard and just accepting. Lol.
    Although I do lint roll his cradle... @cdepperschmidt
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    MoRay05MoRay05 member
    MercyC1130 said:

    @ColoradoHiker It's funny while I was pregnant I was SO concerned about all this hair.. This is one thing I'm not ftm-ing so hard and just accepting. Lol.
    Although I do lint roll his cradle... @cdepperschmidt

    Just wait until LO is crawling and has in all over their pjs, hands and in their mouth... So gross. It's like they are a dog hair magnet.
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    chein1chein1 member
    MoRay05 said:

    MercyC1130 said:

    @ColoradoHiker It's funny while I was pregnant I was SO concerned about all this hair.. This is one thing I'm not ftm-ing so hard and just accepting. Lol.
    Although I do lint roll his cradle... @cdepperschmidt

    Just wait until LO is crawling and has in all over their pjs, hands and in their mouth... So gross. It's like they are a dog hair magnet.
    We received a few outfits for LO with either a black shirt or black pants...exchanged them immediately. Not even worth it.
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    bellie1223bellie1223 member
    We went to an event at the brewery where I work the other night and kept baby in her car seat the whole time so people wouldn't try and hold her. It was packed and SRO, so we were pressed up against a bookcase which happens to have a small potted plant on it in a flimsy plastic pot. Not once but twice (!!) my husband knocked the plant over onto our sleeping baby in her car seat getting dirt all over her. The best part was she couldn't even be bothered to wake up! Definitely gave her a bath as soon as we got home even though she'd had one the night before. I was finding dirt in all the cracks and crevices, it was too funny, my husband felt so bad!!
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    cdepperschmidtcdepperschmidt member
    @bellie1223 you should try baby wearing! So easy for crowded places and your body heat out LO to sleep.
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    bellie1223bellie1223 member
    cdepperschmidt said:

    @bellie1223 you should try baby wearing! So easy for crowded places and your body heat out LO to sleep.

    I do have a baby k'tan and have used it a few times. This night happened to be a 1930's theme party so I was wearing my flapper dress and the k'tan would've ruined it :smile:
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    MercyC1130MercyC1130 member
    chein1 said:

    MoRay05 said:

    MercyC1130 said:

    @ColoradoHiker It's funny while I was pregnant I was SO concerned about all this hair.. This is one thing I'm not ftm-ing so hard and just accepting. Lol.
    Although I do lint roll his cradle... @cdepperschmidt

    Just wait until LO is crawling and has in all over their pjs, hands and in their mouth... So gross. It's like they are a dog hair magnet.
    We received a few outfits for LO with either a black shirt or black pants...exchanged them immediately. Not even worth it.
    I've got a black dog and a golden dog, so no win here. Lol
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    rachswirachswi member
    @itstheblackwidowbaby I routinely use my son as a table. It's actually easier for me to eat dinner if he's breastfeeding because not only can I just rest him on my boppy and let him go to town, but I set my plate on top of him (if it's not hot) and eat my dinner. Although I did drop food down his back last night...
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    RaisingJulianRaisingJulian member
    Everyone's worst parenting fear happened to me last night. I fell asleep while burping my baby went to roll over & he fell off the bed! Thankfully we just have a mattress on the floor cuz our box spring & frame couldn't fit through the door in our room & we were to lazy to replace it. & there was a pillow right where he fell. I feel like the worst mom ever though.
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    dsty1213dsty1213 member
    I successfully cleaned up dog puke off the floor with my son in the moby wrap. Hello leg work out.
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    SweetTooth126SweetTooth126 member
    @rubirubi89 it's so funny that you say that because I told my mom "I'm working up to breastfeeding in public." She told me to grow up and get over it and just do it, he has to eat. She didn't understand my hesitation! Glad it went well for you.

    Married DH December 2014
    Expecting DS#1 November 2015
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    AmoLovesAudAmoLovesAud member
    Figured out how to breastfeed hands-free with the boppy, so now I can knit, eat dinner, or play games on my tablet to pass the time.  Win!
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    RaisingJulianRaisingJulian member
    NovemberSno said:

    So I have a stand in shower. My girls wanted to give LO a bath so I let them sit in the shower on a towel and I sat outside while LO was in her baby tub. I got each one of us a washcloth. We were soaping her up and the girls were taking water from the bottom and squeezing it on her. She LOVES bathhtime so she was enjoying completely! My husband walks in and is like what are you all doing? I said we're giving her a bath. He said she looked like the queen and we are her concubines lol. I laughed so hard! My 7yo said mommy what's a concubine I replied nothing sweetie daddy's crazy! Lol. Jerk!


    Lmao this kind of reminded me of Mulan when the men r distracting the guards. "Concubines.. Ugly concubines" lol now that I'm an adult that joke is hilarious.
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    NovemberSnoNovemberSno member
    RaisingJulian said:

    NovemberSno said:

    So I have a stand in shower. My girls wanted to give LO a bath so I let them sit in the shower on a towel and I sat outside while LO was in her baby tub. I got each one of us a washcloth. We were soaping her up and the girls were taking water from the bottom and squeezing it on her. She LOVES bathhtime so she was enjoying completely! My husband walks in and is like what are you all doing? I said we're giving her a bath. He said she looked like the queen and we are her concubines lol. I laughed so hard! My 7yo said mommy what's a concubine I replied nothing sweetie daddy's crazy! Lol. Jerk!


    Lmao this kind of reminded me of Mulan when the men r distracting the guards. "Concubines.. Ugly concubines" lol now that I'm an adult that joke is hilarious.
    Hahaha!!!
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    angelinthepit23angelinthepit23 member
    Well tonight was the worst so far. LO was falling back asleep after every bottle, it was great. Then the last bottle I laid him down to change his diaper because he pooped while I was burping him. Laid him on my bed and not only did he spit up what seemed like almost the entire bottle, he then proceeded to pee everywhere (of course the chaos started once the diaper was off!) Then he had a one hour stretch of hiccups. So I've been up since 5:30, washing my sheets now. Need to look up how to wash a heater mattress pad. Ugh!
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    RaisingJulianRaisingJulian member
    rachswi said:

    I asked DH to change LO's diaper so I could get set up to feed him. Zeke was farting a bunch and DH said he'd wait till Zeke was done pooping. I told him they just sounded like farts, no poop, so DH went ahead and started changing his diaper. Sure enough, as soon as Zeke's diaper is off he farts and shoots poop at DH's face. My bad.

    I probably would have been laughing so hard at that!
    LO pooped the other day while I was changing him &it managed to shoot from the changing table to our bed & floor. I thought it was hilarious how far it went. My fiancé on the other hand didn't find projectile poop very funny lol
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    Ceridwen77Ceridwen77 member
    I went through 4 diapers in one changing session today. Got her cleaned up from the original wet diaper, got the other diaper under her and she peed - soaked the 2nd diaper and the disposable changing pad. Ok, clean her up again, get the 3rd diaper under her, diaper cream on, and boom, giant poop explosion. Got the 4th one on and she starts farting - lucky for us it was just gas and somehow she didn't get anything on her outfit. That was a win!
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    AmoLovesAudAmoLovesAud member
    edited December 2015
    We had a lot of firsts today:

    1. First time wearing the pretty Vera Bradley jammies that Grammy bought her (which of course are over-the-head jammies)

    2. First poopsplosion out of the diaper and up the back (before getting a photo for Grammy of course)

    3. (So of course:) first poop in hair incident (and first poop on mommy;I've gotten loads of puke and pee, but this was first poop. I feel like 4.5 weeks is a good record for going so far with no poop wearing!)
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    Pontot31Pontot31 member
    AmoLovesAud said:

    We had a lot of firsts today:

    1. First time wearing the pretty Vera Bradley jammies that Grammy bought her (which of course are over-the-head jammies)

    2. First poopsplosion out of the diaper and up the back (before getting a photo for Grammy of course)

    3. (So of course:) first poop in hair incident (and first poop on mommy;I've gotten loads of puke and pee, but this was first poop. I feel like 4.5 weeks is a good record for going so far with no poop wearing!)

    Most of the over the head ones have slight flaps at the shoulders so you can pull them down their body instead of over the head.... Something to remember for next time. I didn't learn that until after a few poop in the hair incidents.
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    AmoLovesAudAmoLovesAud member
    Pontot31 said:
    We had a lot of firsts today: 1. First time wearing the pretty Vera Bradley jammies that Grammy bought her (which of course are over-the-head jammies) 2. First poopsplosion out of the diaper and up the back (before getting a photo for Grammy of course) 3. (So of course:) first poop in hair incident (and first poop on mommy;I've gotten loads of puke and pee, but this was first poop. I feel like 4.5 weeks is a good record for going so far with no poop wearing!)
    Most of the over the head ones have slight flaps at the shoulders so you can pull them down their body instead of over the head.... Something to remember for next time. I didn't learn that until after a few poop in the hair incidents.
    They were a little small on her, so I'm not sure that would've worked well.  I wanted her to wear them once and get a photo for my mom before she outgrew them completely.  But, I didn't know that's what those flaps were for!  thanks, that will save me future poop-in-hair moments!
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    Ceridwen77Ceridwen77 member
    Pontot31 said:

    AmoLovesAud said:

    We had a lot of firsts today:

    1. First time wearing the pretty Vera Bradley jammies that Grammy bought her (which of course are over-the-head jammies)

    2. First poopsplosion out of the diaper and up the back (before getting a photo for Grammy of course)

    3. (So of course:) first poop in hair incident (and first poop on mommy;I've gotten loads of puke and pee, but this was first poop. I feel like 4.5 weeks is a good record for going so far with no poop wearing!)

    Most of the over the head ones have slight flaps at the shoulders so you can pull them down their body instead of over the head.... Something to remember for next time. I didn't learn that until after a few poop in the hair incidents.
    This is great advice!!! Thanks for sharing!
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    NovemberSnoNovemberSno member
    dramaphile said:

    Had DH give her a bottle of breast milk last night and then went to put her down in her crib, but she wasn't sleepy like she usually is when I BF her. Usually she eats till she's full and then pulls off and falls asleep against my boob, so I undid my bra to offer her my breast to see if she might eat more and she promptly leaned against it and passed out!

    Haha that's so cute! She was like umm..hello I need mama's soft boobies to sleep on! Lol
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