Guilty feelings? — The Bump
October 2015 Moms

Guilty feelings?

My son will be 2 months on Thursday! I've really been wanting to go get my haircut and my eyebrows done. Which I usually always go to the cosmetology college and it costs like less than $15 total. But I feel so guilty even thinking about treating myself or doing something that seems so selfish! My boyfriend says that it's not selfish and that I deserve it but I just feel like that money could be used towards something more important for my son. Have any other mama's felt this way?
carmv01

Re: Guilty feelings?

  • Yes. My husband works 1/2 days on Wednesdays, and I'm always dying to go do something without the baby. I feel bad since he's been working too, but I feel like I need to do something for myself. Shopping, pedicure, anything.
    Angheat56
  • Exactly! I want to do those things but once I'm in the position to do so I second guess myself and just feel like I'm being selfish!
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  • Thank you ladies!
  • I bought a few things from Maurice's when I was out Christmas shopping. Husband told me to as I needed a couple things. I haven't shown him what I got as I feel guilty about buying it and I may take the items back and don't want him to feel bad I didn't do anything for myself as he just spent some money on a few things he kind of needed and got while it was on sale. I had some gift cards for little one so that did free up some cash to get a few extra things but I still feel bad.
  • Take time for yourself, mamas!! It's so easy to feel guilty about wanting to take care of yourself or do something for you, but you DESERVE it! Show your kids that it's natural for moms to step away and get a haircut, manicure, work out, read, or just have some me-time. It reminds me of this post I saw the other week:

    Your needs as women absolutely matter :) Let's teach our girls and boys to respect this.

    WeddingNotes13
  • J1D said:

    Nope. Basic upkeep like a haircut and eyebrows isn't selfish.
    Unless it means your son doesn't get something he needs. Like if you can afford formula OR a haircut but not both then that would be selfish.
    If baby has food, clothes, a safe place to sleep and a roof over his head- go get your hair did!

    Right now my husband just finished up school and just started working again. We are in debt up to our eyeballs from him taking time off for school. We should be ok in January to spend a bit of money but at the moment we actually do have to choose between formula or a haircut, so no haircuts for me. But come January when we get caught up a bit money wise you better betcha I'm going to get my hair done, my brows down, and buy some new clothes! And I won't feel one teeny tiny bit guilty about it.
    Don't feel guilty to treat yourself like a person. Once your baby has all his needs met you should do something for yourself.

    All of this. I am currently waiting to get a 1 hour massage and my mom is at home with the baby. You gotta remember to take care of you if you want to be able to take care of baby.
  • if you have people that are asking to see the baby all the time, think of it as doing them a favor to let them watch the baby for an hour while you take a little break! My MIL and SIL are constantly wanting to hold him and play with him, so I think of it as a way to let them have their time with the baby while giving me a chance to get an errand or two out of the way much faster than I would with the baby in tow! Plus, I live in Kansas so it saves me from having to take the little guy out into the cold Kansas weather with me! Double win!
  • if you have people that are asking to see the baby all the time, think of it as doing them a favor to let them watch the baby for an hour while you take a little break! My MIL and SIL are constantly wanting to hold him and play with him, so I think of it as a way to let them have their time with the baby while giving me a chance to get an errand or two out of the way much faster than I would with the baby in tow! Plus, I live in Kansas so it saves me from having to take the little guy out into the cold Kansas weather with me! Double win!

    Agreed! My husband and I had our first date night last night. When we picked LO up from my mother-in-law's house, before we could thank her for watching her...she thanked us for letting her watch the baby!! Seemed a bit backwards to us, we had to laugh. But just goes to show how much the people in our lives want to cherish time spent with our LO!
  • We started daycare this week since I'm back to work Monday. She only did 3 hours each day for 3 days (we are doing part-time) but I went for a massage one day and a haircut the next day! I want to look decent when I go back to work and it was better than sitting around the house!
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