I had a horrible experience today, one that I don't know how to get past. We lost our baby on November 9, 2015, it was my first pregnancy. We haven't told many people about our mc only my parents and my sisters. Today was my father-in-laws birthday (my DH's step-father). Backstory-I have always had a strained relationship with my MIL, most of it stemming from her jealousy of my parents. She thinks we spend more time with them but most of the time we spend is when we go to church together, which we invite MIL to but she declines to go. And it doesn't help that my MIL and my mother share the same birthday. This year was my mom's 60th so we went on a family vacation the week of her bday and DH came with us of course. We took my MIL out for her birthday the weekend after but he still felt slighted that we did not see her on her actual birthday. So we had a huge blow out fight today at my FIL's bday. We come in and they are unhappy that we are "late", although they never gave us a specific time to be there. I see my DH's cousin and make remark about how long it has been since I have seen him. Somehow MIL's birthday get's brought up and she starts making rude comments and getting upset about it all over again. This happened four months ago. I have really been struggling since my loss and have had severe depression and anxiety which I was on medication for prior to TTC. I have been off of my meds so when she begins trying to fight with me I have a severe anxiety attack and walk outside crying to get my meds that were in the car. DH follows to talk to me and MIL follows shortly after. She tells me very rudely that I don't need to cry. I try to explain that it was not because of her but because of some other things going on in my life and then she complains and starts yelling that I don't share my life with her. DH in a moment of frustration trying to get her off of my back tells her about our mc. She does not even bat an eye before she starts complaining about her birthday again. She didn't even say she was sorry!! Regardless of how she feels about me, that was her grandchild and her son's child. I can't bring myself to even begin to think about forgiving her. I am at a loss for words and I am so emotional. Any suggestions about how to move past this? I am already going through so much emotionally, like we all are, but now this on top of it? I hate the fact that she even knows. And she is not one to keep secrets so I'm sure it won't be long until she tells someone. I am just so angry.