May 2016 Moms
jbo008
member
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Just needed to vent
jbo008
member
Before I start I'd like to give you some background. I'm 21, a college student, and I still live at home with my parents. I found out I was pregnant in September. I'm single, which I think was the hardest fact for my dad to take into account. My confusion stems from the issues recently with my father. We both have the same alpha personalities that don't necessarily mesh well when it comes to certain things. more recently I've noticed that when it comes to my babysitting, my father has become very judgemental of my clients. For example, I typically babysit nights while they go to a club, dinner and a movie, and sometimes I even babysit for an entire weekend depending on the family. But recently my father has been very upset with one of my clients (who is actually now one of my best friends and is friends with my entire family including him) that I've been working for since I was 15 and her eldest was 6 months old. Her eldest is now 6 and she also has an 11 month old who was born premature so she's a little more needy. I mainly babysit when she's working late or the occasional she's going out with her friends. I have no issue with it because those are the main jobs I've taken since I was 13. She sets up the guest bed and I usually take little 15 minute naps between checking on the kids. But now my father doesn't even want me babysitting the 11 month old for her during the day let alone at night. Any time I say she needs me to babysit he immediately gets pissed off and quiet and won't talk to me. Then gets upset when I come home from babysitting around 1 in the morning and starts bashing her as a mother and saying she doesn't care about her kids and is irresponsible which isn't the case at all. I understand that he's having a hard time adjusting to my pregnancy but to go from having no issues with me babysitting for her and then to this has seriously confused me as well as pissed me off. She's not my age, nor is she irresponsible in the slightest but for some reason he has now decided to act like this. I'm more afraid now that my father will begin being judgemental of me as a mother in the same fashion he is with my friend. It definitely hurts to hear him say things like that about her but to think that he has the power say the same things about me honestly breaks my heart. I just don't know how to approach the situation and make my concerns known because I know it will escalate somewhere that's unnecessary.
Re: Just needed to vent
Sounds like he is concerned about you working late nights whilst pregnant and maybe about future late night babysitting when you have the baby?
And that fear/worry has an umbrella effect even if you work days.
Your dad's irritation probably comes from a good place, I can't imagine that he means anything terrible acting like this.
I have a younger sis about your age and more often than not, when she is fighting with my folks (she also lives with them still) is because she can't see why they are worried or acting like they do. They often have legitimate reasons which she deems silly.
Maybe having a conversation with your dad to establish his actual fear and trying to explain to him that you need the job for baby and that you are being responsible will help solve the situation.
I doubt that he will judge you as a mom!
Anyways, just my two cents, I might be completely wrong!
Good luck! X
But parents (people in general) are confusing, and I don't think that ever goes away!
But trying to walk a mile in someone's shoes sometimes solve problems.
X