Christmas/Chanukah question

AllisA914 · November 2015

This question is for anyone who celebrates both Christmas and Chanukah.

Backstory: I am Catholic and my husband is Jewish. Before getting married we decided we would bring up our children to celebrate both religious holidays. We have a 21 month old son and this system has been working well so far but I have realized this year that getting him 8 presents for Chanukah plus Christmas gifts is going to be financial ridiculous. Especially next year when we have 2 children.

For those who do celebrate both, how do you handle gift giving? Thanks in advance.

NicknShan · November 2015

I don't celebrate both anymore, but I used to be in a relationship with a man that was Jewish, and we did. We did small gifts the first 7 days of Chanukah, and two larger gifts, one on Christmas, and one of the last day of Chanukah. The first 7 days were like a build up. Like chap stick. New socks or mittens. etc. We also set a total budget beforehand on what we were "allowed" to spend in total to be "fair" so to speak, so neither one of us were going over the top.

I think it's great you are teaching both :-)

tjenkins528 · November 2015

Same situation here- I'm Catholic and DH is Jewish. Luckily, his family already does just one gift for both (his parents are the same, his mom is Catholic, dad is Jewish).

The one bigger gift seems to work. Otherwise I've thought of doing smaller toys that can be separated. Haven't run into any issues with our 17-month old... yet! Good luck!

MynaBird · November 2015

We do books for Hanukkah, one each night.

berky84 · November 2015

Same situation and haven't figured out what our game plan is going to be since this is our first so I'm interested in how experienced parents are doing it.

I like the idea of smaller (stocking stuff like gifts) for the first 7 and bigger gifts on the last night and Christmas. But I want to be really careful with how it's executed. I don't want my child preferring one holiday over the other just because of the present situation.

Linsbins · November 2015

Maybe you could switch up the big gifts. One year it's on Christmas, the next year it's not.

lolonvive · November 2015

I'm Jewish, and when I was a kid we did 8-ish gifts, most were small, but by teen years we were doing one gift on Hannukah on the last night. Now we are lucky if we can all get together for a meal!

lauren0913 · November 2015

I'm Jewish / Husband is Catholic - we celebrate both & will continue to do so when the baby is born - I've always gotten my 'big' gift for Hanukkah and other Griggs for Christmas - I like the idea of buying the child a mix of large & small gifts and spreading them about through Hanukkah & Christmas:) I did have to laugh at @lshamah 's comment because we did the same thing - when we were children we did the 8 gifts - once we got older my parents either just gave them all on the 1st night cause we became impatient or we just got money

AllisA914 · November 2015

Thanks for the suggestions. I think its going to be a struggle to make it "even" but we will try.

little_bren · November 2015

I think it's neat to be able to celebrate both. No experience but small gifts for Chanukah except the last day if that's the biggest day as pp said and then othe gifts for Xmas?

vulpini · November 2015

I'm Jewish. No one I know does 8 big gifts just from the parents to the kid. It's usually one gift and if you chose give something each night, then it's socks, candy, books, fun pencils, stickers, or other small things. Some families let kids open one of their gifts (from different extended family members) each night. Others open all the gifts on the 8th night. Usually as kids grow up you drop the little gifts.

IKAmouse808 · November 2015

I was raised celebrating both holidays. Hanukkah gifts were small- like Chapstick etc. I love the idea of giving 8 books. As we got older, we kept going through the motions of lighting the candles each night but no longer received gifts. To me, that's the most important aspect to keep intact.

cdnrunning · November 2015

Won't kids end up naturally preferring Christmas as it's likely the holiday that the majority of their friends are celebrating?

MynaBird · November 2015

In terms of religious significance (if you strip away the gifts and other secular traditions), Christmas is a more serious holiday within Christianity than Hanukkah is within Judaism. Hanukkah is a festival more on the same scale of religious significance as Purim. Not that that makes a difference in terms of the more secular kind of celebration, but it's worth remembering that Hanukkah isn't just "Jewish Christmas."

cdnrunning · November 2015

@Mynabird I agree wholeheartedly from a religious standpoint (I'm also Jewish), however, I feel like we (Jews) have increased the value of Hanukkah to "compete" with Christmas.

AllisA914 · November 2015

Actually I live in the suburbs outside of NYC. The city where I live has a very large Jewish population so i would say it's almost 50/50 in the area of town I live.

Jason&Erin82507 · November 2015

I'm Christian, my DH is Jewish. We celebrate both and give gifts to the children on the 1st and last nights of Hanukkah . Christmas is several gifts. 8 gifts per child (x3) + Christmas gifts for all 3 would be too crazy! I live in the burbs outside NYC too.

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