Keeping the spark alive while pregnant?

Re: Keeping the spark alive while pregnant?

• PrimRoseMama member

  November 2015

  -- Date nights
  -- long walks
  
  

  Really, everything you did while you were dating to maintain intimacy. Pregnancy is a big deal, but not so much so that it should affect the quality of your relationship.

  
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• STBBaby member

  November 2015

  I couldn't agree more. That's why the moment he said something I thought to myself "uh oh. need to fix this!" lol thank you any other suggestions ladies? 

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• PugsandKisses member

  November 2015

  PrimRoseMama said:

  -- Date nights
  -- long walks
  
  

  Really, everything you did while you were dating to maintain intimacy. Pregnancy is a big deal, but not so much so that it should affect the quality of your relationship.

  Especially in first tri (unless you have bad M/S or bleeding). There is not much you can do for baby now. Just drink water and take your PNV. Spend the other 23 hours a day like your normally would
  
  

  Thank God for Raid.
  
  
  

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• kyraaD member

  November 2015

  definitely make sure you guys get as much "you" time aa you can. once baby comes all your energy is gunna be devoted to that little one for quite a while.
  me & my SO do a lot of date nights. we go to movies, go to wing-night at the bar down the street, go for walks every sunday morning.. things like that.

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• cls01 member

  November 2015

  I'm in the same boat I feel so bad for my fiance. I'm always so tired or just not feeling well at all. Even going on a date night isn't an option because I get so naseous with foods and smells. I'm hoping the second trimester is better for both our sakes!

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• european90 member

  November 2015

  I feel the same way. Between being so focused on the pregnancy and having all-day nausea, it's been tough to get into a romantic mood. DH is extremely "smitten" ( for a lack of a better word if you know what I mean) with me and the thought of me carrying his baby excites him. I love that about him.

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• PrimRoseMama member

  November 2015

  So wait, is this question about sex or general intimacy? Sex can be a challenge during first trimester, but honestly I think that you are "taking enough for the team" carrying the fetus. If you don't feel up to sex then there are a thousand and one things that can be done physically to maintain intimacy. Relationships are more than just intercourse or BJs. Expand your repertoire and think outside the box. There are so many ways to keep the intimacy that don't revolve around sex.

  For us just cuddling is a majorly intimate situation. We enjoy just being together. As cheesy as it sounds-- board games and if you want to get naughty-- naughty games. Movie nights, and going to street fairs.
  
  I'm not being snarky when I say I'm confused about the exact premise of this question. Sex is AWESOME and I like lots of it when I can get it-- however, first trimester it might not happen and I think that's ok.

  
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• ArtlessIbex member

  November 2015

  I'm curious about this too. If this is a question about general intimacy, I.e. How to feel closer to your spouse, then I second the poster who said to live like you did pre-pregnancy. Do all the stuff you did before, so far as you can. No need to obsess about the pregnancy.
  Some ideas: date night where you talk about non-pregnancy stuff. Walk and hold hands. Feed each other. Tell him something you love about him. Play music and dance together in the living room.
  However, if your question is because your husband is complaining that you're nausea is making you unable to have sex as often, tell him to suck it up. Your sex life is changing and that's just the way it goes.
  Just FYI, it will probably not improve post-pregnancy either...

  

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• acadia07 member

  November 2015

  Ugh. He can have his spark back when I'm not feeling like I'm going to barf in his mouth.

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• lillebowski23 member

  November 2015

  @PrimRoseMama thank you for talking about sex in the 1st tri. DH and I have been struggling a bit since the stuff that normally works for me doesn't. Like my nips are SO sensitive that it hurts when he touches them. Last night we almost got into a fight about it and I'm grateful he had the presence of mind to say, "you know, let's just try again tomorrow."
  
  Part of it is that when I'm horny, I'm REALLY horny but the urges leave me as quickly as they arise. He likes to spend time preparing for sex mentally and I often findyself becoming impatient or annoyed which totally kills the mood!
  
  He has been giving me some fantastic back rubs lately and we've decided to skip family Thanksgiving to spend the day together. Thanks ladies!

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• JMarie1291 member

  November 2015

  We have us time everynight. We have a very strong relationship which helps. Hubby is up at 5 am so we are in bed by 8. so after dinner he helps me clean up then we sit down for a little do w.e ....we start getting ready for bed at 7:45. That way we have an hour to unwind and talk and make love. Not like we schedule it every night but its how it works. Also every Fri or Sat is date night. Which hubby is really good at planning and making it romantic. You have to put just as much effort to keeping the spark as you want you husband to! It can't be a one way street.

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