I lost my baby at almost 6 weeks, 2.5 weeks ago. I would have been 8.5 weeks right now and on my way to hear my baby's heartbeat for the first time. It's my birthday today and I was looking forward to this appointment as the best birthday present ever. I thought the timing was so perfect.
Now here I am, on a day that feels as grim as any other day of the past three weeks, feeling empty, physically and emotionally. Feeling like there's nothing I can do to feel happy because nothing can bring my baby back. Nothing would feel as wonderful as walking out of the appointment with a picture in my hand and the memory of hearing my baby's strong heart fluttering and looking forward to having a tiny bump by Christmas.
And I can't just say, go out for drinks, have fun and enjoy yourself, because I don't want to be able to drink... I don't want to be able to do anything that I couldn't do with my baby.
Anyone else going through milestones soon (or recently)? Ideas to cope?
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Re: Little (and big) Milestones
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
Having said that, I think the one good thing that comes out of this terrible situation is to appreciate every little aspect of the pregnancy/birth/baby and in general, life. You will never find me complaining, venting over trivial crap anymore. We have gone through so much that it has given us a different perspective on life. I would say live! Go out and enjoy your husband, friends, family, you are alive one more year. I know the last thing my angels want is for me to be sad, I want to live for them! I know it is hard sometimes and It may sounds corny, but get out there and do something fun for you. You need to take care of yourself. And after all, it is your day-happy birthday beautiful! The future is bright and happiness will come for you.
BFP1 04/24/2015 EDD Dec 2015 MMC 10W5d;
BFP 2 09/25/2015 EDD June 2016 MMC 9wks;
BFP 3 03/22/2016 EDD Dec 6th 2016
Hang in there!
- BFP: 3/10/16 — Baby Girl born 11/20/16
TTC#2 April 2019try to enjoy the time w family and friends. your rainbow will come soon
LFAF April Siggy: TV/Movie BFFs
BFP #4 1/2016, DD born 10/2016