Guess the sex sticky?

CopperLane · November 2015

Hey ladies, I'm afraid my ultrasound might have prompted a lot of "what sex is my baby?" questions, which is fine. I guess the perk of having a sleepy baby is getting a pretty clear image.

I know that in the coming future we are going to get a TON of these questions and "is my ultrasound tech correct?". Veteran moms who have lived through past BMBs, do you think it would be helpful at all to create a sticky where these types of posters can go to guess the sex of each other's babies and ponder/second guess their own?

I know it wouldn't eliminate every type of post (I.e. There is a symptoms post but tons of new symptoms threads still pop up). Would it help to make something like this a sticky?

Bear14+ · November 2015

Yep, my bad! Shouldn't have gone there, sorry!! Opened a whole can of worms that no one wants to deal with!

CopperLane · November 2015

I wouldn't worry about it at all

it's inevitable and I do have a damn clear ultrasound with what might be a nub

we have a video that the shot came from that we are going to send to our OB friends so they can analyze and say what body part it is. They are also OBs in Germany and medicine is handled a little differently everywhere. Most people here might not believe the nub theory but we will see what they say and run with until the 21 week scan confirms or denies it.

I think all this is fun. What isn't fun is "my tech said it was a boy but I want a girl, so you guys please tell me this is a girl even though you can only see legs in this picture I have."

It might be nice to have all methods and picture examples in the same thread to see all the different theories out there.

Atlast111 · November 2015

Nice idea! So exciting for all you ladies getting ultra sounds early. In England, we only have them at 12 and 20 weeks! So I have 2 more weeks to go! I'm trying to be patient but it's hard.

goldie987 · November 2015

The idea is well intentioned but I don't see it working out as well as planned.

I'm inclined against it because most of the theories have no basis in science. There are other forums on the internet dedicated to sex determination based on ultrasounds if people are interested, I don't see the reason to make a totally pseudoscience thread an otherwise fairly pro-science fact forum. Plus, a thread full of pictures of baby genitals seems a bit inappropriate.

Just my opinion of course.

CopperLane · November 2015

Sgoldberg247 said:
The idea is well intentioned but I don't see it working out as well as planned.

I'm inclined against it because most of the theories have no basis in science. There are other forums on the internet dedicated to sex determination based on ultrasounds if people are interested, I don't see the reason to make a totally pseudoscience thread an otherwise fairly pro-science fact forum. Plus, a thread full of pictures of baby genitals seems a bit inappropriate.

Just my opinion of course.

The idea is to try and move traffic from the new posts to a place where it won't be as bothersome to those trying to keep up with what's going on with the board. They are definitely going to happen, especially once the anatomy scans start happening and people want to deny the sex of their babies and hope strangers will tell them what they want to hear. There are still people who will create new posts about, but if the majority of them do have a dedicated thread to go to with such questions and curiosities then it may help.

Plus, I view the theories as a fun thing whether they are unicorn ideas or not. It'd be nice to have a place with collective wives tales that don't harass the general public of this board.

goldie987 · November 2015

@CopperLane I understand the intent but have 3 major objections.

1. By stickying such a thread, it lends legitimacy to the theories that have none. I don't find encouraging pseudoscience/doubting the professionals to be a good idea.

2. The responses are going to be the same, they're just all going to be concentrated in one massive thread of snark. Stickying it isn't going to stop people from opening the thread or make them respond any more positively. If anything, it will keep it going longer because it'll never leave from the first page.

3. The theories are fun to do with people you know/talk to. Most of the sex determination threads have been drive-bys, people who haven't contributed at all to the community, make a single post and never post again. We don't know them or have any type of real life or internet based bond with them which, to me, takes a lot of the fun out of it.

I'd love to hear what other people think, based on many other BMBs and the trimester boards I would think I am not alone in this opinion but maybe our BMB is just full of a different set of people.

Atlast111 · November 2015

CopperLane said:

Sgoldberg247 said:
The idea is well intentioned but I don't see it working out as well as planned.

I'm inclined against it because most of the theories have no basis in science. There are other forums on the internet dedicated to sex determination based on ultrasounds if people are interested, I don't see the reason to make a totally pseudoscience thread an otherwise fairly pro-science fact forum. Plus, a thread full of pictures of baby genitals seems a bit inappropriate.

Just my opinion of course.
The idea is to try and move traffic from the new posts to a place where it won't be as bothersome to those trying to keep up with what's going on with the board. They are definitely going to happen, especially once the anatomy scans start happening and people want to deny the sex of their babies and hope strangers will tell them what they want to hear. There are still people who will create new posts about, but if the majority of them do have a dedicated thread to go to with such questions and curiosities then it may help.

Plus, I view the theories as a fun thing whether they are unicorn ideas or not. It'd be nice to have a place with collective wives tales that don't harass the general public of this board.

@CopperLane. I agree, everyone should be able to choose what they wish to discuss. The Bump should cater for all types of people. If people don't agree or want to participate then simply don't use the thread. Happy to contribute to this!

hockeyfan42 · November 2015

Sgoldberg247 said:
@CopperLane I understand the intent but have 3 major objections.

1. By stickying such a thread, it lends legitimacy to the theories that have none. I don't find encouraging pseudoscience/doubting the professionals to be a good idea.

2. The responses are going to be the same, they're just all going to be concentrated in one massive thread of snark. Stickying it isn't going to stop people from opening the thread or make them respond any more positively. If anything, it will keep it going longer because it'll never leave from the first page.

3. The theories are fun to do with people you know/talk to. Most of the sex determination threads have been drive-bys, people who haven't contributed at all to the community, make a single post and never post again. We don't know them or have any type of real life or internet based bond with them which, to me, takes a lot of the fun out of it.

I'd love to hear what other people think, based on many other BMBs and the trimester boards I would think I am not alone in this opinion but maybe our BMB is just full of a different set of people.

I agree with you! It's annoying enough without it being encouraged.

june2016baby · November 2015

I have no opinion on whether it should be a sticky or not. But I don't think these type of questions are a big deal, especially as posters have the options of skipping over anything that they don't feel is worth reading. There are a few types of questions, (which I won't get into,) that I skip over. I think we ALL do this. So the reality that some people don't like these types of posts, doesn't seem like a big deal. We all have types of posts we care for less than others, and are capable of just skipping over them.

Just my opinion.

goldie987 · November 2015

june2016baby said:
I have no opinion on whether it should be a sticky or not. But I don't think these type of questions are a big deal, especially as posters have the options of skipping over anything that they don't feel is worth reading. There are a few types of questions, (which I won't get into,) that I skip over. I think we ALL do this. So the reality that some people don't like these types of posts, doesn't seem like a big deal. We all have types of posts we care for less than others, and are capable of just skipping over them.

Just my opinion.

Of course we all have posts we care for less than others but stickying a thread that has proven to be a contentious point among posters seems like a recipe for disaster. In the end, a thread full of pictures of baby genitalia just isn't my style and seeing the thread stickied every day that I log on would be really irritating to me and likely many others who frequently contribute to this board. If more people want the sticky than not, obviously my opinion will be overruled but I just don't think it will end well as a sticky.

As far as in general, people are always welcome to post what they want to but on the flip side, people are also welcome to respond with their honest opinions. Disagreeing with the premise of the post doesn't mean you're not allowed to comment or should just move on. If someone asks what the sex of their baby is based on an early ultrasound, I will gladly let them know that early ultrasounds are not reliable. If someone wants us to tell them the determination by their doctor is wrong, same deal. There are entire forums online dedicated to ultrasound sex determination, why does this site need to turn into yet another one of them?

NicknShan · November 2015

First of all - I love science.

And the wives tales? Dumb in my opinion. No science behind it and a complete waste of time. I don't participate in those threads and I don't even open them. You can't tell if it's boy of girl from your breasts, where the baby lies, how much you are farting, or what day you conceived....

But why is it contentious to post about it? I mean, there is so much crap posted to these boards - I don't get why it isn't just another eye roll post and move on (like the bagillion "I lost my symptoms am I still pregnant posts" or "I am tired - is this normal?"). I can think of a lot more things that I would get in a heated argument over - wives tales are not one of them. People not vaccinating? Yes. I can argue over that. Mommas judging other mommas? Yes, I get heated over that. Whether or not the pimples mean you are having a girl? IDGAF.

Anyway, I definitely don't think it needs to be a sticky. I mean, we can't even get the sex thread pinned. Pin the sex thread!

samsonator · November 2015

Sgoldberg247 said:

june2016baby said:
I have no opinion on whether it should be a sticky or not. But I don't think these type of questions are a big deal, especially as posters have the options of skipping over anything that they don't feel is worth reading. There are a few types of questions, (which I won't get into,) that I skip over. I think we ALL do this. So the reality that some people don't like these types of posts, doesn't seem like a big deal. We all have types of posts we care for less than others, and are capable of just skipping over them.

Just my opinion.
Of course we all have posts we care for less than others but stickying a thread that has proven to be a contentious point among posters seems like a recipe for disaster. In the end, a thread full of pictures of baby genitalia just isn't my style and seeing the thread stickied every day that I log on would be really irritating to me and likely many others who frequently contribute to this board. If more people want the sticky than not, obviously my opinion will be overruled but I just don't think it will end well as a sticky.

As far as in general, people are always welcome to post what they want to but on the flip side, people are also welcome to respond with their honest opinions. Disagreeing with the premise of the post doesn't mean you're not allowed to comment or should just move on. If someone asks what the sex of their baby is based on an early ultrasound, I will gladly let them know that early ultrasounds are not reliable. If someone wants us to tell them the determination by their doctor is wrong, same deal.

"""There are entire forums online dedicated to ultrasound sex determination, why does this site need to turn into yet another one of them?"""

I don't think having 1 sticky on this topic is turning this site into "an entire forum online dedicated to ultrasound sex determination." We have many other threads covering many other topics. Just my opinion.

A week or so ago, people were disappointed in the lack of new discussions being posted. Now I feel like half the ones I click on turn into bickering "you shouldn't have posted this." Disappointing. I thought this bump month board started out very strong, now it seems its more just people arguing and/or judging.

goldie987 · November 2015

samsonator said:

Sgoldberg247 said:

june2016baby said:
I have no opinion on whether it should be a sticky or not. But I don't think these type of questions are a big deal, especially as posters have the options of skipping over anything that they don't feel is worth reading. There are a few types of questions, (which I won't get into,) that I skip over. I think we ALL do this. So the reality that some people don't like these types of posts, doesn't seem like a big deal. We all have types of posts we care for less than others, and are capable of just skipping over them.

Just my opinion.
Of course we all have posts we care for less than others but stickying a thread that has proven to be a contentious point among posters seems like a recipe for disaster. In the end, a thread full of pictures of baby genitalia just isn't my style and seeing the thread stickied every day that I log on would be really irritating to me and likely many others who frequently contribute to this board. If more people want the sticky than not, obviously my opinion will be overruled but I just don't think it will end well as a sticky.

As far as in general, people are always welcome to post what they want to but on the flip side, people are also welcome to respond with their honest opinions. Disagreeing with the premise of the post doesn't mean you're not allowed to comment or should just move on. If someone asks what the sex of their baby is based on an early ultrasound, I will gladly let them know that early ultrasounds are not reliable. If someone wants us to tell them the determination by their doctor is wrong, same deal.

"""There are entire forums online dedicated to ultrasound sex determination, why does this site need to turn into yet another one of them?"""
I don't think having 1 sticky on this topic is turning this site into "an entire forum online dedicated to ultrasound sex determination." We have many other threads covering many other topics. Just my opinion.

A week or so ago, people were disappointed in the lack of new discussions being posted. Now I feel like half the ones I click on turn into bickering "you shouldn't have posted this." Disappointing. I thought this bump month board started out very strong, now it seems its more just people arguing and/or judging.

My point wasn't that the whole forum would turn to sex deteminination, more that there are entire forums out there with that as their sole purpose, why sticky something that causes argument every time it comes up when there are sites that are super supportive of all of it that you can use if you want to talk about such things?

As to your second comment, I haven't seen much of "you shouldn't have posted this". I've seen suggestion for where the answer can be found as many times repeat threads fall quickly from the first page and posters don't get much help with their question. Either that or suggestions to join in on one of the daily threads with their question instead of starting a totally new thread for themself. It's organization, not asking people not to post at all.

hockeyfan42 · November 2015

I think there's also a limit on how many threads can be stickied?

It seems more pertinent to have the sex thread (where people actually know what they're having) pinned than a thread full of sex guesses based on pseudoscience.

CourtJack · November 2015

Subject matter aside, I just don't want many more additions to the sticky list right now. I feel like I have to scroll down 1/2 the board already just to get to the posts. I suppose that makes me sound insanely lazy, but I just don't want stickies to keep piling up.

NicknShan · November 2015

Can we vote on removing some of the stickies?

kstoneee · November 2015

Why are people arguing over a sex determination post?

Corts · November 2015

Staring intently at someone else's baby's shnads? Gross...

mrsschmity · November 2015

Corts said:

Staring intently at someone else's baby's shnads? Gross...

"Shnads"

colesmom33 · November 2015

So, people want a thread where other non-medical people can make uneducated guesses on the sex of their unborn child based on a blurry ultrasound? I'm assuming these are ultrasounds where the trained professional has declined to make a guess, am I right? To each his own, but seems dumb to me.

samsonator · November 2015

It's just for fun! Reeelllaaaaax. If it's not fun for you, which I totally 100% get your point of view, can't you just skip it? This is like a broken record at this point!

MynaBird · November 2015

I think we should sticky one thread in which everyone has the textbook Bump argument that ends up being hashed out repeatedly on thread after thread:

Here's a silly question or other thing some people don't care about discussing.
Snarky response(s).
Some GIFs.
Some posts about how some people just can't say anything nice.
Some pointing out that these kinds of threads traditionally don't go over well on TB and suggestions re: using the search function.
Extended back-and-forth about who should have just ignored whichever comment/thread they didn't like instead of responding to it.
OP coming back, reading the responses and then flouncing, promising never to waste anyone's time with her silly questions again only she thought this was a place where people could ask questions and she guesses she was wrong.
A quick chorus of "You guiiiise, we are supposed to support one another!"

I feel like if we could just get that out of our systems right at the top of the BMB, then we could skip it in the threads. THAT would be a public service.

Edit: Sandwich and words at same time.

WinniethePoohsPants · November 2015

jaceyannie said:

So, people want a thread where other non-medical people can make uneducated guesses on the sex of their unborn child based on a blurry ultrasound? I'm assuming these are ultrasounds where the trained professional has declined to make a guess, am I right? To each his own, but seems dumb to me.

I completely agree. And I also don't really see the point of posting an ultrasound photo. As heartless as this sounds, all ultrasound photos look EXACTLY the same to me.

totsabounding · November 2015

MynaBird said:

I think we should sticky one thread in which everyone has the textbook Bump argument that ends up being hashed out repeatedly on thread after thread:
Here's a silly question or other thing some people don't care about discussing.
Snarky response(s).
Some GIFs.
Some posts about how some people just can't say anything nice.
Some pointing out that these kinds of threads traditionally don't go over well on TB and suggestions re: using the search function.
Extended back-and-forth about who should have just ignored whichever comment/thread they didn't like instead of responding to it.
OP coming back, reading the responses and then flouncing, promising never to waste anyone's time with her silly questions again only she thought this was a place where people could ask questions and she guesses she was wrong.
A quick chorus of "You guiiiise, we are supposed to support one another!"
I feel like if we could just get that out of our systems right at the top of the BMB, then we could skip it in the threads. THAT would be a public service.

Edit: Sandwich and words at same time.