OH rant!!

Re: OH rant!!

• Knottie86418473 member

  November 2015

  Sorry you're going through that! My symptoms seemed to "click" for DH when he went to my first appt with me. It was like he had to hear from the doctor that it's normal to be exhausted and hormone-y. (And thankfully she also mentioned I shouldn't be cleaning out the litter box - I haven't had to ask him once since then. ) Not sure if you've seen your OB/MW yet but I'd encourage you to bring him along to appts if you don't already. Also, if he's a reader you can suggest some books or sites on pregnancy - maybe he's just unaware how much it really takes out of you.

  Good luck to you though - hope things start going better!

  

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• mdargie member

  November 2015

  Yesssssssssss

  I'm going to kick him in his stupid face. I will include a disclaimer - I am probably overreacting/hormonal/oversensitive. But for some reason everything he says pisses me off. I feel like he is on his phone 110% of the time, and he cannot multitask at all, so if I try to talk to him he ignores me completely. AND then if I repeat myself, he gets annoyed and says to stop pestering him. Are you F*#&$ing kidding me? 

  
  

  He also gets pissy when I ask for help of any kind. His response is always sarcastically "yes dear" which one of these days is going to get him a left hook, I swear. UGH. 

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• catherinekate member

  November 2015

  Ugh, sorry to hear this. Are you a FTM or do you have other kids? I'm a FTM so I can't compare personally but friends of mine have said that their partners were way less supportive with the second + kid than they were the first. It's like they think that because you've done it already once before that it should be easier.

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• Funkymooncow member

  November 2015

  @Knottie86418473 - he came to the first appointment but it's almost like the midwife never said anything to him ! He definitely won't read - I have suggested it. He is normally like this when I'm ill - I stupidly thought that being pregnant might bring out some empathy but no!
  @mdargie - yep he is exactly the same when I ask for help grrr!
  @catherinekate I'm a FTM so i thought he would be as excited as I am
  
  Thanks for all the advice - having come back from work he is still in a foul mood just saying 'this is what I've always been like' so don't really know where to go from here - very doubtful I'll get any sort of apology so guess I'll just have to 'suck it up' and ignore his selfish behaviour!

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• june2016baby member

  November 2015

  Here is an example fromy house: I noticed that our shower was absolutely disgusting, so I cleaned it. (I'm the one who cleans at our house.) So that night I casually apologized to my husband saying that I had been too tired to clean it or even notice it was dirty. So he looks at me and says with 100% sincerity, "Oh it's ok, it was so disgusting that I almost didn't want to go in there. But I knew you were worn out, so I figured I'd be nice and not say anything."
  
  I was flabbergasted and couldn't help but reply, "Umm, you do realize that being nice would have been to help me out by cleaning it yourself, right?"
  
  So he looks completely dumbfounded and says it never occurred to him to clean it, and that he wouldn't even know how!
  

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• m8881 member

  November 2015

  Yes yes yes ladies. I'm on my 3rd pregnancy and nothing has changed but my H is great at providing for us so I don't complain. He is not capable of empathy or any sort of nurturing, has no bedside manner and grumbles if I ask him to do something. He at least does the dishes but won't lift a finger to cook or clean otherwise. He will care for our older two kids so I can sleep but his idea of watching them is to let them play video games the whole time. Men!

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• huskypuppy14 member

  November 2015

  I'm sorry your husband's are not being supportive. My husband is pretty good, but they'll never know what it feels like for us. I just throw a " it's hard work growing a human, would you like to do it?" When he's being annoying. The least they can do is do the dishes or the clean the bathroom.

  
  
  
  

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• Marisac888 member

  November 2015

  My current strategy is to make sure he is around/hears when I throw up. That usually gets me some sympathy and no complaints when I am being totally lazy.

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