Breastfeeding in Public

brynagc · November 2015

I am a FTM and haven't been out much with my 3 week old baby. This is mostly because I am nervous about breastfeeding in public. I'm not sure exactly what the etiquette is for it. My husband and I have been out to eat twice since our baby was born but I fed him before and after at home. Would it be ok to feed him at a restaurant? Are there places that you have learned are no-nos for breastfeeding? Thank you for any advice and support you may have! I really want to get more comfortable doing it so that I can take him out more!

alinic916 · November 2015

You can breastfeed where ever you're comfortable with. Maybe practice with a nursing cover at home if you're nervous. If you're not comfortable breastfeeding in public you can try pumping and bringing a bottle of breast milk.

It gives me anxiety as well. We have to use a nipple shield, which is more work and messier so I have only breastfed in the car. We really haven't been out longer than 2-3 hours at a time so haven't had to breast feed LO while out a lot.

ashwise · November 2015

I just had my first experience bf in public at the car dealership waiting for my car to get fixed, surrounded my men!! Haha. I used my nursing cover I got and tried to mind my own business. The guys left me alone and didn't seem to mind. I'm all for bf wherever you feel comfortable, don't let anyone else influence your decision on when and where to feed your baby. Good luck!

clairesmommabear · November 2015

Wherever you are comfortable! You are legally allowed to breastfeed anywhere you are allowed to be present, so don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Also avoid bathrooms, for obvious sanitary reasons. What I did at restaurants is request a booth instead of a table, its easier to nurse there and it provides a barrier from other customers as well. Just remember, it doesn't matter what anyone thinks of you breastfeeding in public! If they have an issue they can look away.

altow1310 · November 2015

I agree with everyone else who has said to do whatever you are comfortable with. That's really the key. You may find there are some places you're comfortable and some places you aren't, and that's ok too. Sometimes you may just have to go out to your car and nurse your LO there if it's somewhere you don't feel particularly comfortable. The only suggestion I have is to have a discussion with your husband (if you haven't already) about what he's comfortable with as well. I know he isn't the one doing it and it is ultimately up to you, but it's important to keep his preferences in mind as well. My son is five weeks now, and I'm to the point where I will pretty much do it anywhere because it's so natural now, but my husband is pretty protective of me and doesn't like the thought of other guys seeing my breasts, which I completely understand and respect, so I usually use my cover or go to the car if we are in public (depending on the situation and location).

jburrell13 · November 2015

I was the same way, the nervousness goes away. My daughter is a month now and I feed her anywhere without a second thought

jburrell13 · November 2015

I honestly found the best cover to be one of my old infinity scarves, it's cotton and just unwraps she goes in there like a little tent and covers the rest of my abdomen so everything is completely covered

kelsojohnso · November 2015

For retail places use the fitting rooms!

crbpjb · November 2015

Baby is 12 days old I'm a FTM and I breastfed through the whole meal at Cracker Barrel today. Wouldn't people rather see me nurse than listen to my screaming infant?

I used a nursing scarf. I tried at home first and found that needing to do it at the restaurant today made me better at it.

Honestly I feel worse about the screaming baby bothering people. If my nursing bothers me I don't care. I try to cover up, but I don't care beyond that if it bothers someone. #sorrynotsorry

whitemn04 · November 2015

aprosch said:
You can breastfeed where ever you're comfortable with. Maybe practice with a nursing cover at home if you're nervous. If you're not comfortable breastfeeding in public you can try pumping and bringing a bottle of breast milk.

It gives me anxiety as well. We have to use a nipple shield, which is more work and messier so I have only breastfed in the car. We really haven't been out longer than 2-3 hours at a time so haven't had to breast feed LO while out a lot.

I too get nervous to nurse in public and have been having to use the shields. It just makes it so much more awkward trying to position baby, keep the shield on, and keep covered. I would nurse in my car or have been pumping to take bottles. But just now, after a couple weeks trying, LO latched!!! And he nursed for 20 minutes! Now I'm hoping with some practice we can get more comfy nursing in public and not need to take bottles.

floyd1rl · November 2015

kelsojohnso said:
For retail places use the fitting rooms!

I nursed in the "Big and Tall" dressing room at JCPenny today. Plenty of room! Lol it was just the closest clothing area at the time. I don't understand why all malls don't have a mother's room available..

dalzien · November 2015

I breastfeed wherever I want to when our LO is hungry. I don't use a cover either. As long as you're not looking for attention, then you won't get any. I have had very little issues with people, and honestly the more you feed out in public the easier it will be for you. You'll get more confident each time, and it will be a quicker/easier process. It also helps to know your rights as well. This way if someone tries to tell you to leave/cover-up/move to a bathroom you can tell them that you have every right to be there and that it is against the law to ask you to move/leave.

crbpjb · November 2015

Way to go, @dalzien ! I use the cover because I feel more comfortable, but more power to those who don't!

koriemo · November 2015

I wish I could breastfeed in public! Feeding is still an ordeal for us... I need to use both hands, and he unmatched several times throughout the feeding. It requires a lot of my concentration too. I've only ever done it in the car!

tracij12 · November 2015

I literally never fed in public with DD1. This time I'm much more comfortable (used a shield with DD1 and don't with #2 which is part of it). I started mainly in the car....then randomly stumbled on the mothers room at Nordstrom in the mall so have used that a few times and for the first time this week did it sans a cover at a kids play place. It was not intimidating at all b/c there were lots of moms there!

nianicho777 · November 2015

Anywhere you want. I was super nervous about this and my baby is 6 weeks! At 3 weeks I had to breastfeed him at a shoe store and an old man walked over, saw us, and kinda ran away and he must have told his wife and she came over and rolled her eyes....at the time I didn't care(because I was covered with a receiving blanket, but after, it made me a bit self conscience so I was nervous all of the time...but yesterday I had to nurse at Denny's because my bottle wasn't fitted with the proper top or something and the milk was leaking out! The restaurant was packed but no one said anything or looked at me funny. The best part is that my best friend was there and fed me French fries while I nursed because I was starving! Lol

nimmunogirl · November 2015

Silly question, but how do you hold your little one when using a cover? She is 6 weeks old, but I'm not ready to venture in public just yet.

ameares721 · November 2015

I wear a tank top under my shirt and use a cover (a stretchy cotton one that is also an infinity scarf) and a nursing bra. I I clip my bra with one hand, lift my top layer up, the bra and tank top down and under my boob (all under the cover of course) and I haven't had any problems. I've done it at the state fair, restaurants, at people's houses, etc. My Personal preference is in the car so I can relax but honestly it's not so bad. Just own it! If you look uncomfortable, you'll fumble around. I get relaxed in my chair and sip on my water at restaurants. I make eye contact with the servers and pretend like nothing is going on! It's a little awkward when baby starts slurping but that's life! I would much rather BF in public than deal with a screaming baby and I'm sure that others would, too! However, if you're out shopping, family lounges or fitting rooms are great!

doe2813 · November 2015

I never thought I would be comfortable Bf in public! When my DS was 3 weeks old my mom knew I needed to get out so we planned a short trip to the mall. I fed him right before we left so I would have about two hours before we needed to be back home. He had other plans! After about 20 minutes of being there he started screaming crying and I knew he was still hungry. I was waring a scarf so made a shield and started feeding him as we walked around Macy's. More people looked at me while he was crying than while I was feeding him. We ventured out into the mall while he was still eating and I felt really natural doing it. We ended up staying at the mall a few more hours and having lunch where I fed him again!
I have two older daughters 12&11 (I did not breastfeed them) who would question what I was going to do if he needed to eat in public (mall, softball games...) and were so embarrassed just by the thought! Now they are so comfortable and use to it I don't think they even notice when I'm feeding him now.

cindykinnear · November 2015

I have a hard time keeping covered while nursing. I fed her at chills and was a bit exposed, but no one seemed to care. I sat in a booth and that helped. I have also gone out to the car and fed her, and used the dressing room at target. I am so tired of being at home, so I don't let breastfeeding hold me back from going places. I have also pumped a bottle and fed her that. For me, that was ideal, but not always available.

nianicho777 · November 2015

nimmunogirl said:
Silly question, but how do you hold your little one when using a cover? She is 6 weeks old, but I'm not ready to venture in public just yet.

I just baby hold him like as if I was hoping him to have a free hand (kinda like a front football hold). Not sure if that makes sense

nimmunogirl · November 2015

@nianicho777 that's helpful, thanks!

joules11235 · November 2015

I wear a nursing tank and a tshirt (and sometimes additional layers since it's getting chilly). I feed wherever looks comfortable at the time, no cover. So far, I like the big comfy chair section at Sam's, the comfy chair display in the baby section at Target, the chair/crib section at baby's r us until I found their feeding/changing room. I did sit on the ground next to the giant tree during the tree lighting last weekend to feed. Nobody has said anything negative. Had a couple positive comments.

I did feed dd1 in public with a shield and cover four years ago. It gets easier and more comfortable the more you do it.

lofin · November 2015

Nursing covers are so cumbersome. I wear a tank under my shirt so when she is hungry, you lift up your shirt and your stomach and back stay covered. You literally only see her little head bobbing as she is sucking. No skin or nip. Sometimes I will lay the burp cloth over her for extra privacy or transitions from latching her on and when she is finished. But, really, it's you feeding your baby. Other people around you really don't matter. Happy nursing!

clairesmommabear · November 2015

lofin said:
Nursing covers are so cumbersome. I wear a tank under my shirt so when she is hungry, you lift up your shirt and your stomach and back stay covered. You literally only see her little head bobbing as she is sucking. No skin or nip. Sometimes I will lay the burp cloth over her for extra privacy or transitions from latching her on and when she is finished. But, really, it's you feeding your baby. Other people around you really don't matter. Happy nursing!

Exactly this! I do the same thing and even sitting close to someone they can't see anything.

mandala1107 · November 2015

I'm an anywhere nurser, but do feel more comfortable nursing in the car just so I can really relax and recline the seat, lol. If you do choose to use a nursing cover, like others have said, practice at home. Also, practice with it frequently so baby gets used to having his/her face covered. I never covered at home and rarely left home when my DD was little, so when I ventured out and used a cover when she was older, she hated the cover and would try to rip if off. Get baby used to it now instead of later.

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