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October 2015 Moms
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anyone else think this is strange?

indylardelliindylardelli member
in October 2015 Moms
so tonight I'm staying at my mums house so I can get a full nights sleep. while here my mums partner of 2 years said something about showering him but I didn't take much notice then later on my mum said " oh scott wants to shower him tonight" I was so taken back by it I didn't know what to say and just said no because I wanted my mum to take a photo of me showering him. then later on he said he was going to shower him again in the morning instead! so I text my partner and told him he got angry aswel so I told my mum that he's not showering him because my baby's dad hadn't yet, I didn't want to sound mean and make things awkward but I'm so angry and so confused as to why he thinks he needs to shower MY baby?! like what the fuck how does no one else think this is strange?! myself and baby's dad are the only people who it's okay for him to shower with (he HATES baths and will scream the whole time so I shower him instead, I don't think that's weird?)

should I just leave it at that and make sure it never happens! or confront my mum about it but I also don't want any awkward tension
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Re: anyone else think this is strange?

  • LittlehummingbirdLittlehummingbird member
    That seems very strange and concerning. I would set very firm boundaries around him caring for your child. Follow your gut and address it if this type of thing continues.
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  • indylardelliindylardelli member
    Littlehummingbird said:

    That seems very strange and concerning. I would set very firm boundaries around him caring for your child. Follow your gut and address it if this type of thing continues.

    he definitely won't be caring for my baby now that's for sure
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  • BingjBingj member
    I was just want to say that you need to really trust your gut. Don't second guess yourself when something like that comes up. I agree with you and pp. It is definitely strange!
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  • tracij12tracij12 member
    Agree that's just odd.
    Married DH 08.28.10
    Pregnancy #1: BFP 04.10.11 EDD 12.23.11 DD1 Born 12.4.11
     Pregnancy #2: BFP 5.12.14 MC 5.20.14 @ 5wk4d
    Pregnancy #3: BFP 11.1.14 EDD 7.5.15 MC 11.13.14 @ 6wk4d
    Pregnancy #4: BFP 1.31.15 EDD 10.5.15 DD2 Born 9.23.15
     
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  • edavis926edavis926 member
    Very weird. Just trust yourself on this one. I can't even come up with a long shot reason to back him up with this one..
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  • LindseybubLindseybub member
    Definitely trust your gut instinct! I would feel the same as you!
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  • waltersmom83waltersmom83 member
    Weird. Creepy weird. Trust your gut. I wouldn't bring it up to mom unless she's going to watch baby with him there.
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  • MamaBear345MamaBear345 member
    Personally I don't think it's that weird. But I think I seem to be outvoted here. I mean...he's a baby...and people who aren't parents think giving bathes are fun. And he's been dating your mom for two whole years. As long as he doesn't have a history of being a pervert, doesn't seem weird. My dad gives my daughter bathes?
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  • midge519midge519 member
    I agree with @mamabear345 that people love to shower/bathe babies. But I do find it weird that he's so insistent that he do it. Maybe tell him that next time he could bathe him or once he's holding his head better he can shower him in the sink. Some compromise so you can be there when he does it.
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  • abkenyonabkenyon member
    Maybe I'm misunderstanding the definition but showering I'm thinking him and baby naked in the shower together. I would not allow anyone but me or hubs to do that with our child, even then I just think it's weird but we just bathe our child quickly when she cries.
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  • indylardelliindylardelli member
    MamaBear345 said:

    Personally I don't think it's that weird. But I think I seem to be outvoted here. I mean...he's a baby...and people who aren't parents think giving bathes are fun. And he's been dating your mom for two whole years. As long as he doesn't have a history of being a pervert, doesn't seem weird. My dad gives my daughter bathes?

    he's a baby that doesn't need to be showered naked by another man who would also be naked, giving baths is a whole lot different I think. and only TWO years is nothing, I've only known him for 2 years that's not a long time. I'd be okay with him giving baby a bath but a shower isn't needed
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  • MamaBear345MamaBear345 member
    @indylardelli OH. Okay I'm sorry, I was confused by the word shower. I thought you were foreign and meaning like a bath. I really didn't know people even showered with their babies. But yes, that would be very weird. Now that I understand what you're talking about, him being in the shower naked with him would be kinda inappropriate. A bath fine, a shower no. Sorry I misunderstood you.
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  • indylardelliindylardelli member
    MamaBear345 said:

    @indylardelli OH. Okay I'm sorry, I was confused by the word shower. I thought you were foreign and meaning like a bath. I really didn't know people even showered with their babies. But yes, that would be very weird. Now that I understand what you're talking about, him being in the shower naked with him would be kinda inappropriate. A bath fine, a shower no. Sorry I misunderstood you.

    yes very weird! and I don't think he would have been okay another man showering his daughter when she was a baby so I don't know why he thinks it'd be appropriate, I shower baby every night just because it's easierand he LOVES them and he really really hates baths
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  • Kanne0729Kanne0729 member
    Ugh yeah that is really weird. Giving the baby a bath in the sink, bathtub, or baby bath is one thing, but for a man that your mom has only been dating for two years, which isn't really that long, actually showering naked with him is just strange imo and I don't understand why he would want to do it so bad in the first place. I would not allow it and if they get mad then oh well, but there is no way that a man that is not my husband and the baby's father would be allowed to shower with my newborn baby. Follow your instincts and if you do not feel comfortable with it then don't feel bad putting your foot down and saying no.
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