Future children — The Bump
June 2015 Moms

Future children

My SO and I are deciding on a (loose) family planning timeline and I would like to know the pros and cons of having children close and far apart. Close being a year or two apart. Far being a maximum of about 4 years apart. Opinions? Experience? Our first is currently 4 months old and we would like to have a couple more.

Re: Future children

  • Mine are 5 years apart and so far it's great! we're not planing on having the other one that far apart but maybe in 2 years we will start trying. 5 year olds are in school so you have alone time with the baby and they also know how to listen
  • Mine are 19 months apart and it's crazy right now... But my daughter is so in love with her baby brother that it's worth the craziness. In two years, it will be easier. We would not change a thing. But we are not having any more!!!
    • Married 6/1/2012
    • BFP #1 - 11/17/2012 -  MC 12/10/2012
    • BFP #2 - 2/12/2013 - EDD 10/17/2013 - DD Born 10/10/2013
    • BFP #3 - 1/29/2014 - Ectopic pregnancy discovered 1/31/2014
    • BFP #4 - 9/28/2014 - EDD 6/4/2015 - DS Born 5/31/2015

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  • Our DD's are 11.5 months apart. It's nuts, but I wouldn't change it!
    Search "pregnant again" or another similar thread about pregnant/another baby, and that has some replies that would be helpful to you. :)
  • I don't have any experience with this but I too was thinking of going for #2 as soon as LO turns 1.....but I'm scared! On the upside my sister had a baby and is 2,months apart from my son, so now I think I might wait 2 years.
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    BFP #1 12/23/13 MMC 01/24/14 @ 9w5days

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  • Mine are 2.5 years apart and it's a little crazy. It would have been nice if DS was potty trained before LO came. Otherwise it's been great. Had you asked me a few months ago, and my answer would have been different. Two Littles are tough in the beginning but it gets better!
  • I would like to hear mom's that have twins and then decided to have more. I have twins now but cant even fathom having more children right now. DH and I want more but have no idea when.
  • ^^this. Mine are a little less than three years apart. He adores her and is helpful, but he's three. Good lord, I was not fully prepared for a "threeanger". So much drama and debating. Wouldn't change what I have for the world, but two was a much easier age for DS.
  • I don't but my daughter is in kindergarten with a set of twins. Well 1 of them is in her class and also was for pre-k last year. Their mom had a baby last year and she just turned 1. The twins are turning 6 in January. I think i would wait a few years if you want more than 2 kids! I would love love love twins but doesn't run in my family so I doubt it will happen
  • I don't but my daughter is in kindergarten with a set of twins. Well 1 of them is in her class and also was for pre-k last year. Their mom had a baby last year and she just turned 1. The twins are turning 6 in January. I think i would wait a few years if you want more than 2 kids! I would love love love twins but doesn't run in my family so I doubt it will happen

    Definitely until they are potty trained at least. My aunt has 2 sets of twin boys, and there is definitely some anxiety about having twins again too!
  • Oh god! At least she didn't have to go through being pregnant 4 times! Hah that's one good thing
  • I want another in 3 years. My brother and I were 3 years apart and we were best friends. I want my pup to have the same.
  • I'm pregnant again and am a bit terrified but excited to have a 13 month old and a newborn!
  • We started trying when ds was 18 months. We got pregnant about 2 weeks after his second birthday. I wouldn't change it for the world. Him and his twin sisters are 2 years and 9 months apart. He helps us get supplies for the girls and entertains them. We love the age gap! @jjvanwagner25 good luck! We're done now, but if I we were planning more kids after the twins, I'd wait about 2 years to start. Especially if you ended up with another set of twins!

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  • Ours are 3 years and 4 months apart. Both girls. So far it's been pretty easy, probably because our 3 year old is super independent.
  • I only have one LO, but my sister and I are 1yr11mo apart and my mom says it was planned that way - they started trying for me when my sister turned 1. I love being close with my sister and if things go my way I will try for #2 when LO turns 1. I know it will be a crazy start, but the close age gap appeals to me.
  • @jjvanwagner25 you can message @laurendutch - she has twin boys and just had a baby. She was pretty regular but dropped off just recently here.

    DH first cousin has 18 mo old twin boys and is due any day...... I pray for her soul lol she acts like it's no big deal and takes it all in stride.

  • @klkonwi 18 mo twins AND having a baby? I'm going to have a breakdown just thinking about it! She is a stronger woman than me.
  • I'm not sure if I will ever feel ready for another kid, so I will probably do what we did with LO - pick a time in the seemingly distant future to pull the goalie. If we hadn't said when we were 26 that we'd have a kid at 32, I'm not sure we would have LO now because we still would probably not "feel ready."

    I was originally thinking of trying again when LO is a year old, but now I'm thinking 18 months is probably better. I'd say once he starts STTN but I think that might never happen.
  • henrytviiihenrytviii
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited November 2015
    @virginiaunicorn11 @amccoy129 Don't lose hope. My 3 year old didn't sleep through the night until 14 months but since 14.5 months I've been up with him in the middle of the night less than a dozen times, and ALl of those times we related to puking (i.e. acceptable excuse for needing your mom). You might have amazing sleepers one day! . .
    says the woman trapped under a 5 month old at 10pm. I really need to brush my teeth but if I put him down . . .

    I love the planning on 2nd kids. Nothing seems to go as planned in my life. I'd actually love to have another spaced out by 4-5 years but I'd be over 40. Maybe if I am feeling young. And I'd need a willing partner ;)
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  • This thread is hilarious and horrifying all at once.

    Id really like my children to all be relatively close in age. I've always been really close with my brothers who are 4 years older and 2 years older than me. That said, I'm overjoyed to have 3 wedding in 2016 that i'd rather not be pregnant for. We said the earliest we'll try again is next September after DH's bestfriend's wedding. I wanna be able to go nuts too!
    Sammy Khenrytviiijesscmvalcrimmins
  • We want 3 total. So 1 down lol. We'll wait until baby girl is potty trained before trying for more.
  • When I was pregnant I disliked it so much (I really just didn't like not feeling like me) I was convinced I was 'one-and-done' but LO has convinced me otherwise! I'm thinking we'll go off BC on LO's second birthday :)
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