Beware: venting in progress — The Bump
Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

Beware: venting in progress

Hi,
This is my first post. 2 weeks ago US confirmed no heartbeat at 10W.
I am a 1st grade teacher and the day I announced to my class I was expecting ( one student knew and made it public by asking innocently), I had my doctors appt and got the most heartbreaking news ever . You can only imagine the asking wave that followed.

I have felt in a roller coaster ... At first I was hurt, weak, disappointed, sad, and everything in between. Then I just wanted to focus on work when everyone suggested otherwise. Now, I feel pain.

My husband has an 8 yr old... I love both of them so much. But now I just feel so guilty that I need me time. I feel scared , this was my first baby and it became my Angel Baby... My what ifs are haunting me. What if I can't carry a baby full term? I'm saddened, scared, disappointed, and jealous ...
I see pregnant women and I don't feel comfortable around them... I hear about them and I pretend I care but I am jealous.
There is so much going on with emotions and I just can't find the words to express them... Not everyone understands and I despise when I hear "everything happens for a reason" ... I just can't understand that reason....I am deeply sorry for everyone's loss, I send love to all of you.

Re: Beware: venting in progress

  • I am sorry for your loss. It's a very difficult journey for sure. All of your feelings are normal. Please feel and vent away, we are here to listen, support you and give advice (when requested).

    Just one last thought, there is no reason for this (small % of women/men have issues but that is the exception not the rule). You can obsess yourself asking: Why me? I am trying to stop doing it to myself (sometime I am unsuccessful). I am going through my second loss after 9w, which means I am in the 2%...so I am the statistic.

    I wish you the best of luck and take your time to heal. Focus on you and DH and embrace each other tighter every day. ((Hugs))
    ******TW******Siggy warning
    BFP1 04/24/2015 EDD Dec 2015 MMC 10W5d;
    BFP 2 09/25/2015 EDD June 2016 MMC 9wks; 
    BFP 3 03/22/2016 EDD Dec 6th 2016 

       Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


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